Do you desire to claim your sexual freedom to fully embody and express yourself sexually? What is blocking you from the experience of full sexual empowerment and liberate your sexual energy?
Are past experiences, embarrassments about your body, tensions, the voices of “should’s” and “should not’s”, and feelings of guilt and shame holding you back?
Sexual fears that take root in the fertile mind often sprout into harmful thoughts that can inhibit us from exploring our sexual nature and expressing it. This self-censure-ship causes us to tense up, repress our flow of sexual energy, and exert control over our natural forms of sensual expressions, such as our: breath, physical movement, vocalizations, eye contact, urge to explore through touch, and the ability to let go and surrender to the wholeness of the moment.
The key to sexual liberation is to work through, heal and overcome sexual shame.
The mind is an aspect of our being that if not consciously harnessed and mastered, will sabotage us. When consciously trained, the mind can become a powerful tool for realizing and actualizing our true sexual essence, undiluted.
Learn how to redirect your focus from mental delusions and distractions, so you can experiment with new liberating mindsets and behaviors that will: decondition you from self-censure-ship, reprogram you with your authentic expression, and help you to evolve so you may fully step into the power of sexual energy. When we are sexual, sovereign, that is we “own” our sexuality, our whole reality transforms!
Here are 5 practices that will free the mind, heart, and body for liberating sexual energy:
1. Notice, Investigate and Challenge All Judgements Concerning Sexuality
The experience of freedom begins with a process of deep self-inquiry:
What are the external voices of society, culture, and religion saying about sex? What are the taboos surrounding sex- what is considered “right”/ “wrong”?
Am I internalizing these judgments subconsciously and are they louder than the voice of my own inner guidance system?
What do I think and feel about sex and about my personal sexuality? Do I have judgments about my past sexual experiences, your desires, and fantasies? Do feelings of guilt and/or shame arise when I reflect on these things?
Taking the time to reflect on these questions and honestly answer them for yourself is one of the most loving things you can do for yourself. Do not be paralyzed by “do’s” and “do not’s”. Decide what YOUR principals are concerning your personal sexuality and how you express it.
No one owns your sexual expression. Stand in the center of your own sexual power!
2. Give Yourself Permission to Fantasize
If you were free from judgments (external and internal), what would your full sexual expression look, sound, taste, smell and feel like?
What do you desire sexually? Give yourself permission to wildly fantasize!
Get as detailed as possible so you can utilize your imagination for the adventure of sexploration:
Where are you? Are you by yourself? Are you with one other or with multiple others or alone? What time of day/ night is it? Are you indoors or outdoors, surrounded by nature? Or are you in a public place? Are you in an elevator, in a store, on a public beach, in a sauna, at a museum, at the zoo, at work…?
What are you wearing / not wearing (same with other characters)? What sounds, smells, tastes, textures, and visuals surround you? How do you feel?
Remember, you can cultivate a space of safety in your own mind when you choose to ignore the voices of judgment. Therefore, if and whenever a voice arises saying “You can’t do THAT!” and the accompanying feeling of shame overwhelm you, face the judgment and challenge it by redirecting your focus and continuing on with your fantasy!
Be a rebel with a cause and claim your own mental freedom.
3. Sexploration Through Self-Intimacy
Know your own body!
Do you ever engage in solo sexual exploration? If not, what is holding you back from stimulating yourself by: touching, tracing, massaging, pinching, vibrating, scratching, tapping, slapping, caressing, squeezing, raking, feathering, blowing on, pulling, tickling, rubbing, sliding, pressing, licking…savoring?
Exploring your body sexually with various types of touch will allow you the freedom to fully enjoy the experience of creating a ritual of self-intimacy through touch and masturbation. Have you tried to and are you able to bring yourself to a state of orgasmic bliss?
Are you able to enjoy the sensations of self-touch without orgasm being an end-goal?
Exploring your own body is an expression of self-love.
You will never need to cling to and depend on another to give you sensual/ sexual pleasure and intimacy if you can give yourself this precious gift.
And if you do have the magical experience of connecting with others on a sexual level, then you will be empowered to lovingly direct them with ideas about what pleases you and stimulates your sexual energy and desire. A bonus is that you will have ideas to try out on them too!
4. Let Go of Control
Whether you are by yourself or with others, practice the art of softening to resistances as they arise.
Learn to compassionately notice when you are holding your breath, breathing shallow, tensing your muscles, with-holding your sounds and vocalizations, holding your tongue and not speaking, and stopping yourself from moving freely.
Next, learn to forgive yourself for feeling fearfulness about expressing yourself. Give yourself an internal hug and encourage yourself to work through the fear by doing the exact opposite- be courageously vulnerable and face the fear! Take a risk and express instead of freezing or running from the fears!
Begin practicing “softening” when you are alone. Each time you become aware of the sensations of anxiety in your mind, heart and/ or body, stop and consciously let go of your reaction of control.
Examples of sensations of control are:
Hardening, blocking, tightening, clinging and gripping. These are accompanied by the holding of the breath. These sensations, if not invoked intentionally, are unconscious reactions to fear. Lovingly shine the awareness of consciousness on these reactions and relax the tension by breathing deeply and slowly into the areas of tension. Open the body and experience the sensation of expansion.
Ideas of actions you can do to gently open the body include:
Stretching with intentional breathing, rocking, swaying, shaking out the body and head, rotating the hips and shoulders, spinning, dancing, self-massaging areas of tension, tapping or gently massaging the chakra energy centers, exhaling forcefully, moaning, etc. These methods of release will bring calmness.
Once you have developed a consistent practice of “softening resistance” by letting go of control, in the comfort of your own company, then you will be ready to apply the practice when you are in social situations
For example, if you desire to dance but feel embarrassed about doing so, especially when others are not dancing, redirect your focus from the perception that “all eyes are on you” in a judgmental way and focus inwardly instead. Tune into your breath, close your eyes, start with the feet and allow the beat of the music to animate them. Next, bring your awareness slowly up into the body through the knees, hips, belly, chest, shoulders, arms, hands and neck, allowing each area of the body to respond to the music as it flows through you. I guarantee something magical will happen! Your dance will come from within- from your space of authenticity…and being authentic inspires others to do the same; it is contagious!
5. Embody the Goddess / God
Reprogram yourself with the “I AM” Consciousness.
To ultimately liberate your sexual energy and fully step into your sexual power, you must BE the God/ Goddess! Maybe you’ll find an article about raising your erotic consciousness helpful on the path there.
Claim sexual energy and intimacy through the powerful techniques of creative visualization and the repetition of empowering affirmations.
Try this experiment:
The next time you are engaged in solo self-intimacy or are with a lover, internally or externally speak the affirmation: “I AM a Goddess / God.”
If inspired to, add any words which describe your Divine state of being, such as: graceful, powerful, light, beauty, confidence, gentle, brave, compassionate, wise, healing, effulgent…
Visualize yourself, with as much detail as possible, as a Goddess or God. Allow what you visualize to inform the actions of your body and the resulting sensations.
For example, imagine yourself adorned in the finest jewels and fabrics. Behold, in the clarity of your mind’s eye, your radiance, poise, divine smile, clear wide eyes, succulent lips, supple physique; your state of calm-passion. If you are with a lover, imagine that they too are a Divine Being and that you are lovingly honoring and worshipping them. You see the highest qualities in them, and in yourself.
Maintain awareness of your breath, allowing the flow of inhalation-exhalation to permeate your entire being with kundalini life-force; this is your anchor.
Slow your movements down, take your time indulging in love-play. Embrace an attitude of deliberate, erotic sensuousness.
As a Goddess / God, you will naturally embody the divine qualities of Primal- Source-Energy, which IS your natural state.
Liberating your sexual energy is inextricably tied to a practice of self-love.
Self- love is free from the judgments, distortions, deceptions, and delusions of a mind that have become conditioned by guilt and shame. Harness the mind with compassionate discipline by employing the above five practices to break the bonds of control, liberate your spirit from judgments, and to claim your sexual freedom.