Do you last as long as you want in bed? Are you confused with all the advice on ejaculation control out there?
Most men ejaculate within 5 minutes of penetration. Some finish even faster. And women are not happy about this. That right there is called premature ejaculation!
When men try to look for solutions for this problem, they get all sorts of confusing advice, like, squeeze this, breathe there, etc.
This is why they get inconsistent and unsatisfying results, at best.
To be able to master anything, you need to have an understanding of it and a method that gives you constant feedback and makes you better over time.
The five-step model to last longer in bed
After practicing this for over 15 years, I’ve developed this five-step model to guide you:
Let’s dig deeper into each of them:
1. Understand your why
First, reflect on why coming too fast doesn’t serve you and how it’s affecting your relationship, confidence, wellbeing and even career. Realize how controlling your ejaculation can transform your life. This will give you the reason, the ‘Big Why’ to commit.
You will see life-changing results when you commit to controlling your ejaculation and when you put in the time and the effort to master it. You can do a short ritual to symbolize your commitment. For example, light a candle and set an intention to dedicate this practice to your relationship, mission, or spiritual realization.
Reflect and commit again every time you have sex.
Then, when you have sex, there are three things you need to do: Feel, Stop, and Move
Be aware of how aroused you are.
If your orgasm is %100 of your pleasure, your ‘point of no return’ (PNR) is at around %80. If you reach this point, it’s already too late, and you will fall into the ejaculatory response.
So, during masturbation or sex, keep feeling into how aroused you are, and make sure you stay at around %40-60 of your pleasure.
You cum when you are too aroused.
So, how do you last longer?
Before you get too aroused, before it’s too late, simply STOP – either pause or actually pull out. Sometimes you will need to move away from her or even leave the bed.
This is where most men fail, so make sure you slow down or stop well ahead of the PNR.
So you’re feeling you are too aroused, and you stop.
And then what?
Think of your pleasure, arousal and sexual energy as a heavy liquid, a heavy load (yep…) that you are carrying in your genital area.
As long as you are carrying this heavy load, you remain too aroused, too close to the PNR, and you can’t keep having sex.
You need to MOVE this load, move the sexual energy, away from your genitals, into the rest of your body and specifically up your spine.
This is the part that is missing from most courses about ejaculation control. They all teach you about the point of no return but no one tells you how to move your friggin energy! and then it gets too much and you come!
There are many techniques and practices to move the energy, for example, exhale fully and hold your breath for as long as you can, or visualize the energy going up your spine.
The core of my method to control ejaculation is Feel, Stop, and Move. Remember that the next time you have sex.
But there’s more to ejaculation control than just mind-blowing sex.
Ejaculation control isn’t just about lasting longer but about transforming your life with the power of your sexual energy.
It will transform your relationship, creativity, confidence, career, friendships with other men, spiritual practice, social interactions, and other aspects of your life.
So, if this practice can transform your life,
transform your life to support this practice.
There are daily practices and exercises outside the bedroom that will help you with this practice, as well as lifestyle changes, hobbies, and habits that will take you even further.
And there’s even deeper transformation possible, if you are serious.
Some men choose to cum after an hour or two of love-making, but if you want to experience the life-changing effects of this practice, minimize or avoid ejaculation all together, and make sure you keep moving your energy after sex. Soon you will experience whole-body orgasms without ejaculation and never look back.