About This Course
What You Will Learn
- Découvre ce qu'est le sexe sacré
- Apprends les bienfaits de la pratique du sexe sacré
- Identifie les éléments qui composent le sexe sacré
- Développe un rituel pour faire l'amour
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For everyone. Singles, couples, all genders and orientations.
Your Instructor
Aida Lucie & Solar Bodhidharma
Spécialistes en Sexualité Sacrée
Aida et Solar sont Spécialistes en Sexualité Sacrée, le duo parfait pour enrichir ton intimité sexuelle grâce à des enseignements tantriques puissants. Ils te présentent les principes fondamentaux du sexe et des rituels sacrés pour une révolution dans ta relation.
More by This InstructorLessons and Classes
- 1. Bienvenue dans ce cours
- 2. Qu'est-ce que la sexualité sacrée
- 3. Les bienfaits du sexe sacré
- 4. Le pouvoir de l'énergie sexuelle
- 5. Intentionnalité
- 6. Présence
- 7. Activation de tout le corps
- 8. Les yeux du cœur
- 9. Abandon
- 10. Intimité avec soi-même
- 11. Le pouvoir du travail respiratoire
- 12. Respiration d'activation pour elle
- 13 .Respiration d'activation pour lui
- 14. Respiration expansive
- 15. Respiration orbitale
- 16. Circuit énergétique
- 17. Introduction aux éléments
- 18. L'élément Terre
- 19. L'élément Eau
- 20. L'élément Feu
- 21. L'élément Air
- 22. Pourquoi les rituels
- 23. Ingrédients du rituel
- 24. Éveil des sens
- 25. Vénération du yoni
- 26. Vénération du lingam
- 27. Rituels de plaisir solitaire pour elle et pour lui
- 28. Rituel d'amour
- 29. Playlist de musique pour rituels
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Transcripts
Hi, and welcome to this online course. My name is Aida Lucie. I'm a holistic sexuality educator and the founder of Bliss School. And my name is Solar Bodhidharma, and I'm an integral tantra teacher. And in this online course we're gonna be diving into the world of sacred sexuality. And this is the perfect course if you've been curious about sacred sexuality and kind of wanting to dive into this world but not exactly sure where to start. Now in this video we just wanna start off by giving you some practical tips on how to get the most out of this course. So this online course is a mix of both theory videos and practice videos. And we really want to encourage you to take the time and listen to the theory. There is sometimes for people with the tendency to just look for the exercise, jump into the practice and not pay attention to much of the instructions. The theory is there in order to give you context so you understand why are you doing this exercise and what you're supposed to get out of it and giving you all the instructions so you know how to do it right. On the other hand, you also wanna make sure to do the practices and exercises. Some people, I think myself included, have a tendency when we take an online course to kind of skip over the exercises or practices, or kind of half do them, and tell ourselves that at some point we'll go back and do them, but the truth of the matter is that usually we don't go back to actually practice them. So in order to get the most out of the course you really wanna do all the different exercises and rituals and practices because the theory is what orients your mind, but the practice is where all of that knowledge really becomes embodied. Because as much as we can tell you what an exercise is supposed to do or how it's supposed to open you up, the best way for you to really experience it is to do the practice and have an embodied experience of that. - As well the course is build intentionally in a certain sequence in certain development so you can really get the best out of it, just like you don't wanna skip any exercise or theory lecture. Also try to go in order as you go through the course. - And I also wanna make a little note on inclusivity and just preface by saying that this online course is open to all sexual orientations and all types of relationship dynamics, whether you have one partner or you are in an open relationship or polyamorous relationship with multiple partners or whether you're heterosexual or bisexual or gay, this course applies to everyone. So for the different exercises, you can apply it to whatever relationship structure you're in and just know that this course is inclusive of all different types of relationships. - And as well, whoever you decide to practice with, just making sure that everyone involves are consenting adults, so we can play safe and consensual. - So go ahead and dive right into the course. We hope you'll enjoy it, that you'll get a lot out of it, that you'll have amazing orgasms and deep and meaningful experiences with your partner or partners. And we wish that the force of orgasm may be with you. - So what is sacred sexuality or what does it even mean when something is sacred? When we experience something which is sacred for us or when we are in a sacred moment our perspective of the situation is shifting. And therefore also our experience, all of sudden there is a feeling of wonder and awe, and our hearts open and there is a flow of gratitude. We somehow remember that there is a magic in life that there is wonder, that there is things that inspires us and open us into a space which is beyond thoughts times and space. This space, this place of wonder is actually very natural for us but for whatever reason, we pushed aside, maybe because of cultural conditionings or other reasons. We pushed aside one of the main things that so naturally can bring us into that state of wonder and of course, I'm talking about our sexual energy and we have been conditioned to push aside this life force energy that makes us feel so alive. So connected, so invigorated and to see it as something which is dirty, sinful or in one way or another low in resonance and even wrong and the sexual energy is that life giving force energy. This thing that makes us feel so excited, connected and alive, but with all this way of seeing sexuality as something which is sinful, dirty, lower desires and in one way or another wrong we are cutting ourself away from that life force energy and from this super easy and natural way to enter into the sacred. But we can also reframe our perspective, shift our attitude towards sexuality and engage with this energy from a completely different place. And by that starting to recognize the divinity, which is again actually present in every moment of our lives. By doing this, we are allowing our mind to become free from all kind of old conditioning and start to allow those energies to move through us. We start to see things in a different light. Our hearts opens and we feel so much more connected to every moment. All of this might be a little bit challenging in the beginning but practicing sacred sexuality will allow you to realign with this life force giving energy within you or very much the essence of you. And by allowing, aligning with that, everything in life again starts to get transformed. You start to learn how to see the magic in every moment and feel this wonder and awe in everything that you engage with. Now according to where you coming from in the world and what's your culture is like you might have different ideas and opinion about sex but if there's one thing that I believe everybody can agree upon is that the sexual force is the life giving force. Is the one place that we all came from. We all were born and the energy that brought us into life is that sexual creative energy. So in that way, the sexual energy have that almost magical capacity to create life, to bring into being, to take from the transcendent and bring it into the imminence. In the same way, the sexual energy and specifically the orgasmic energy have the capacity to take us on the other direct, not so much back to the source but allowing us to bring our mind being rooted in the body, being very embodied connected back into spirit and that's for the very famous saying, "going from sex into spirit" but this time completely embodied. When we have what we, when we experience full body deep orgasms with ourselves or with our partners, we go deep into a different state of consciousness and as it's happening throughout the sexual interaction it's much more easy to stay aware as you transport yourself, as you move from one state of consciousness into another. And by that it's much more easy to recognize them and to become much more familiar with them. In many ways this is a very similar process to what people do when they practice meditation. Only to do this through meditative practice usually takes anywhere between three to five years to start stabilizing those states and in this way your love making, sacred sexuality becomes a form of spiritual practice. You make love with your partner. You engage with that sexual energy. You allow yourself to be transported into a vast expensive space where you connect with the sacredness and the force of life and you do all of this by being present. And hopefully as you enjoy the practice you do it more and more often and this transition into deeper states of consciousness become more natural to you. Putting it simply, sacred sexuality is seeing and recognizing the sexual energy as something sacred and divine. It's a practice in which we shift our mind and utilize different practices to recognize that divinity to see our physical body and also our genitals as a temple something which is divine by itself and help us to connect to the sacred. We try to clean our mind from all kind of conditionings and ideas that see sexuality as something dirty and wrong or sinful, and really connect to that essence and allow us, allow it to move through our body, to radiate through our eyes and our hearts and radiating to all directions. Shifting our attitude to an attitude that embraces life and creation. Bringing into the process, our minds, our hearts, our body and soul. Having a fully embodied spiritual life and experience. So with this new mind frame, we really want to include and embrace everything. So sacred sexuality is not about having just slow gentle and vanilla sex, when we just look each other in the eye and breathe together. I mean, we do do those things as well. Yes, those are some of the practices but sacred sexuality embraces all types of sexual expression. You can be slow or fast, soft or hard, you can be into kink, BDSM. Your orientation might be gay, straight, bi, whatever it is. It doesn't really matter as long as you bring your heart and this attitude of openness and sacredness into your sexual life. So hopefully by having those repeated experiences where you activate the sexual energy throughout your body and you feel the sense of sacredness and awe, we can come to bridge these two things. Sexuality and spirituality and become complete embodied beings. - So why sacred sexuality? Perhaps you already have a very nice and exciting sex life and you may be wondering what sacred sexuality has to offer. So in this video, I'll talk a little bit about the benefits of practicing sacred sexuality on a regular basis. So what are some of the benefits of sacred sexuality besides all of the amazing health benefits that we already know sex has to offer? The first one is more pleasure and aliveness, and who doesn't wanna feel more pleasure and who doesn't wanna feel more alive. The reason that sacred sexuality can amplify are pleasure in sex is because through the different techniques and practices that you'll learn in this course, sacred sexuality invites us to become more and more present to all the micro sensations that are happening in our body in every single moment. So many of us have become quite desensitized to pleasure, we're living in a society where we're constantly bombarded with a lot of stimulation, through porn, through movies, through magazines, through bright colors, through our phones, we're constantly bombarded with very high intense stimuli which over time can decrease our sensitivity, meaning that we need more and more and more stimulation or input in order to feel a little bit of pleasure. By practicing sacred sexuality, we start to rewire our brain and we start to become more and more present and aware of all the micro sensations that are happening in every single moment, meaning that you can tap into way more sensation and way more pleasure. Another reason that sacred sexuality can increase your pleasure potential is because through sacred sex, we can learn to elongate our central and sexual experiences. So often when we masturbate or have sex, we're kind of rushing to the finish line, but in sacred sexuality, the invitation is really to slow down and become really present without rushing to an end goal. And through the different breathing techniques which you'll learn later on to help you circulate your sexual energy, it can actually help you last longer in bed, have more elongated and full orgasms, and in turn experience a lot more pleasure and aliveness in your entire body, not just in your genitals. And that kind of leads me already into the next point I wanted to talk about, and that said it can activate our entire body. A lot of the times we engage in sex or self-pleasure just from the level of our genital. So we just localized all of our attention on this little little part of our body. But sexual energy is located throughout our body and we can learn to move and circulate it to amplify orgasmic experiences. So I'm not gonna go too much into that because you'll learn that more in-depth later on, but through sacred sexuality, we can learn to tap into full body orgasmic experiences. So it's taking our pleasure from just one part of our body to our entire energetic structure. Another beautiful benefit of practicing sacred sexuality which I most definitely have experienced myself is tapping into a deeper sense of sexual liberation and freedom. So many of us unconsciously sometimes hold a lot of negative or limiting beliefs around sex. Beliefs that sex is dirty, that it's sinful, that it's taboo, that our genitals are something which are lower than in an area of our body that we shouldn't be proud of. And what this can lead to over time is that we start to feel very disconnected from our bodies, from our sexual energy and we have a lot of shame around being sexual beings. And by cultivating a devoted, sacred sexual practice either by yourself, or with a partner, or with both, we slowly start to reprogram our minds. We start to connect to our sexuality as a sacred force. We start to see our genitals as divine temples. We start to see love making as a prayer, self pleasure as an act of self worship and self devotion. And the more we start to engage with sexuality from that place, with that attitude, what starts to happen very naturally is that we start to let go of shame around sexuality. We start to heal negative body image issues and we start to cultivate a very personal relationship with that sexual energy that moves at the core of our being. The more we can learn to free energy in the body, the more we can activate our sexual energy and amplify it the more fuel we have in our life. It's like think of yourself like a vessel and when we have all these limiting beliefs, or when we have shame around their sexuality, or we feel are around our bodies, or we try not to express our pleasure because we think that that means that we're a slut or whatnot. What this does is it contracts us. It limits us. And the more that we can engage in sacred sexual practices that help us release all of these limiting beliefs and blockages, the more we can become open vessels, the more energy can move through us. And that doesn't just impact the way we relate to sex but it also impacts the way we show up in life. We feel more confident, more radiant, more alive, more joyful. Another beautiful benefit of practicing sacred sexuality is that it can help you cultivate deeper intimacy and connection with yourself and with your partner. I truly believe that this is such a core human need that a lot of the times we mask with other needs. A lot of the times our needs for sex, or our needs for attention and approval are coming from that core need of wanting to be connected to another human being, of wanting to be really met in a deep level. And sometimes we go into sexual experiencing, kind of craving that, maybe we're aware of that need, maybe we're not, but usually what we're craving when we have sex with another person is to be deeply, deeply met. And sometimes when we engage in more just physical based sex without engaging all of our energy, our heart, our mind, our soul in the experience, it can leave us feeling a bit disappointed or like the experience was more superficial. Whereas when we tap into it with all the different practices and tools that you'll learn in this course that sacred sexuality has to offer, it becomes very easy to tap into deep states of openness, to really meet yourself on such a profound level, and from that place of self intimacy also being able to meet your partner on a deeper level. And this course will also will be teaching you some of our favorite rituals, and not gonna say too much about it yet, not to spoil it. But rituals are beautiful containers that make it so easy, so effortless for us to connect more deeply with our intimate partners. And they help us get out of habitual patterns, especially if you've been with a partner for a prolonged period of time, usually what tends to happen is we get into kind of sexual habits. So we make love a certain way. We always kiss a certain way, we foreplay a certain way, do this position, that position, orgasm, turn around, fall asleep, and move on with our day or our night. And what can happen over time is that it becomes kind of stagnant. It just becomes a routine that doesn't really spark anything new. And by cultivating these sacred sexual practices and doing rituals with your partner, it helps you break out of those habits and create new space for magic, for love, for connection to spring. And lastly, another really powerful benefit of practicing sacred sexuality is the spiritual benefits. Just like perhaps you may go to yoga classes or meditation classes because you're seeking for that inner peace, that inner remembrance, that feeling of coming back home into yourself and being deeply connected to everything and everyone in the universe at large. And usually what happens is that we think that sex is like separate from that, so maybe we have a practice in the morning on our yoga mat, and then we step out of our practice and into our normal life and into sexual experiences. And perhaps we don't feel as connected during sex as we do during yoga or during meditation. But sacred sexuality bridges those two worlds. It bridges sex and spirit. So our sexual life can be included in our spiritual practice and they're no longer separate. But through the force of the sexual energy we can actually reach deep meditative states of awakening, of remembrance, and of openings of the heart. - Before we dive into the principles of sacred sexuality and really dive into the how-to, I wanna talk a little bit about the power of sexual energy and orgasm. I really believe that our minds play a very big role in our experiences, and if we have a certain limited notion of what sex or orgasm can be, if our mind is limiting it through its definition, it can also limit our experiences. So, most of us, when we think about sex or sexual energy, think about the energies of horniness and lust and passion and what we see in the movies and in porn, and that's definitely a certain spectrum, a certain expression of sexual energy, but it's not the entire picture. When we go to the core of it, sexual energy is the life-creating energy. It's the energy through which all of us came into the universe. It's to create a force that gave birth to stars and galaxies and planets. And that same energy is the energy that lies at the root of our pelvis. When we feel that tingling, that heat, that pressure when we start to feel aroused or when we see something that turns us on, that's the same energy that birthed our universe and that power, that force, is right here in our very own bodies. And now most of us, maybe the the biggest thing that we managed to do with it was to build it up a little bit and then explode it out in a short three second genital sneeze, AKA a very short orgasm, but there's so much more untapped potential there. And what happens when we don't open up into the vastness of our sexual energy, when we suppress it, when we try to cage it down, when we try to keep it down there because maybe we've been told that it's taboo or dirty or shameful, or maybe we have all kinds of inhibitions, what happens is that we dim our light, we dim our vibrancy. We dim our radiance. Whereas when we listen to the ancient wisdom traditions of the East, and we learn to master this energy, to amplify, to circulate it throughout our entire body, we become more alive, more connected. We become open vessels for life to move through us. So, I just want you to open your mind that sexual energy does not just equate lust or horniness. That can be one expression it takes, but it's the very essence of life itself. It's an energy that moves you to wake up in the morning. It's the energy that gives you inspiration, creativity, drive, sexual desire. So I really invite you to open up your definition and your mind, so when you think of sexual energy, don't just think of lust or horniness, but really think of it as it's the very essence of the universe moving through your body. And in this course, that's exactly what we'll be focusing on is how to master this core energy of life, not only to give you deeper pleasure and more profound orgasms, but also to awaken your heart and to expand your consciousness, so you can show up more fully in the world. And I'd also like to talk a little bit about orgasms because some of us also may have a more limited definition of what orgasm is. Like a short little explosion at the level of the genitals, or a quick peak of pleasure. But if we go deeper into it, if you think for a moment about what an orgasm feels like in your body, most people when I ask them in my work to describe what an orgasm feels like, like how they would describe an orgasm if an alien came to earth and asked, what is an orgasm, how would you describe it to an alien? Most people describe it as a moment of utter and complete bliss. A feeling where all times stops. A feeling of merging either with your partner or with the universe. A feeling of complete disillusion, your ego melting, a complete openness and surrender. And when we start to list down all these characteristics, we start to see something very interesting. All of these different ways that people describe an orgasmic experience is the exact same way that people, meditators and yogis describe states of awakening. And this is where we can start to see that orgasms are glimpses of awakening. It's a moment of complete stillness in the solution where we can really remember our true nature. And that's why some of the ancient spiritual traditions of the East gave us different practices to learn to elongate our orgasmic experience. So we can really meditate into our orgasms, and our orgasms itself can become a spiritual practice. So, orgasms at the deepest levels are glimpses of awakening. Osho called enlightenment the cosmic orgasm. So the notion that an enlightened being is a person who is in a constant orgasmic state, where you're fully connected, fully surrendered, fully opened to your true nature. So, I just invite you to open up to the possibility that besides just genital pleasure, orgasms can really open you up to the depths of love and the fullness of life. - So the first principle or pillar of sacred sexuality is intentionality or being more intentional as to why we are engaging with the sexual energy. So often we engage with different things in life, whether it's sex or anything else really, without really being aware of our underlying motive or intention for engaging with it. One of my favorite questions to ask my clients and students is why do you have sex? And usually the first like response is kind of like startling. Like that's such a random question but then when I ask them to sit with it more and to journal and to really be honest with themselves why they have sex, what comes up is usually pretty interesting. Usually the first reaction of our mind is that we wanna give the right answer. I have sex to connect for intimacy, for pleasure, for bliss, for love, whatever it may be. So usually that's what our mind wants to think is our main motive for having sex. But usually when I got my clients to keep on journaling and just writing down, whatever comes up, a lot of very other interesting things start to come up. For example, one very common motive for sex, an underlying motive that maybe we're not aware of, is as a currency exchange. So maybe we exchange sex for love or sex for approval. We think that is if we are amazing in bed, then our partner won't leave us or they'll love us more. Or maybe we use sexuality as a way even to slightly manipulate. A lot of the times I've heard clients say that they've used sex when they felt like their relationship was in a breaking point. And they felt like that's what would keep the relationship together. Maybe some of your motives for sex is for power, for control, for approval, for your sense of worthiness. And it's not to say that any of those make you a bad person because in our subconscious we all have different motives for why we engage with different things in life. But being more aware of why we engage with something can drastically change the results we get out of the experience. So if we want to start to tap into the sacredness of sexuality and to expand our sexual experiences, to feel more deep and meaningful, it's helpful to anchor in a clear intention before engaging. So instead of just letting the lust or horniness or maybe some of your insecurities come in and start the pattern of having sex for these different motives, instead, really anchoring in a clear intention that for example you would like to have a deep, meaningful experience with your partner or that you would like to heal sexual blockages or that you would like to have a full body spiritual orgasmic experience. Because what happens when we set an intention is that it guides our attention. And I just want to again say that sometimes we just wanna have sex because we're horny and we wanna release some of the tension in our genitals or sometimes we just wanna have make-up sex after we had an argument with our partner. So it's not to say that, you know, you always need to have a super spiritual intention, but especially when you're doing a ritual with your partner with yourself, or when you really are dedicating some time for intimacy and love making, anchoring in an intention is really going to help you up into deeper places. Now you don't have to state an intention out loud. You don't have to start, if things get kind of juicy and hot and then you don't need to stop everything and be like, one second, let's set our intentions. You could do that. But depending on the situation that might kill the mood or depending on whether or not you're partner is into this, maybe they think you're really woo, and they're not really into it, you don't have to say that out loud. This can be an internal process. So just anchoring within yourself, like, I would really like to move past some sexual blockages that I've been experiencing. Or, today I would really like to expand my orgasmic capacities. I would like to experience a different type of orgasm or today I would really like to have a profound spiritual experience together with my partner during love making. And of course, it's not to say that because you set the intention, therefore it's 100% going to happen but it's gonna lead the energy in that direction. It's gonna be more likely that you're going to experience that because you're anchored in and your awareness is tapped into that intention, and intentions could be something you would like to call in or it could be something you would like to let go of. Maybe you would like to let go of some inhibitions that you've been feeling and you're gonna anchor in that intention and consciously allow yourself to express yourself more during love making, to make more sounds to be more primal, to express yourself through movement. And maybe when you notice some inhibition come up, you can remind yourself of the intention you set prior and then break through that because you know that that's why you're engaging with this practice today. It allows us to become like conscious creators where we're creating magic with the force of sexual energy, and where we are no longer kind of run by it. Where when the feeling comes up, maybe we feel kind of overtaken by it but we can become the masters of sexual energy. We can choose how to play with it and where we want it to guide us. So this is a core, core pillar and principle of sacred sexuality is about being intentional and really anchoring a clear and simple intention each time we self-pleasure or each time we make love. Again, it doesn't need to be, I wanna have an amazing spiritual experience. It could just be that I wanna feel more sensitivity in my body or today, I wanna be more present with my breath as I make love. So you can make small intentions but this will slowly help you to drop in deeper and deeper and to have more secret sexual experiences. - The first principle that we would like to introduce is Presence. And that's because being presence will carry us throughout all the different things that we are about to do. So, what do we mean by presence? Here, it's very much in its most obvious or simple way, is bringing all of your awareness to what it is that you're doing right now. A lot of the times we might be engaging in an activity or even listening to a friend but a certain percentage of our awareness is somewhere else. We might be, like I said, listening to a friend, we're hearing what they're saying but they might say to us that they feel that we are with them, that we are not really present. We might be able to reflect to them, what they just said a second ago but we know that some of our awareness were somewhere else. Maybe we were already thinking about what we're gonna say in response. Maybe we were at the house and there was something cooking in the kitchen. And 30% of our awareness was on that timeframe of something going on somewhere else so we were not completely in this moment with our friend. Because our mind is such a magnificent tool and it's able to project to the future and reflect on the past, we tend to get stuck in the is habitual pattern and not to be fully present and aware with what is in front of us. That's while we are doing something by ourself, when we are in a conversation with a friend and even when we make love with our partner. And just like when somebody is talking to you and they can feel that you are not 100% with them, for sure when you're making love with your partner, if there is a part of you which is thinking about something that happened before in the day or some worries about the future, that will take away from your presence with them and really affect the feeling of connection. One very simple way to start to bring more presence and that's not necessarily in the love making, just like a simple practice to do in day to day, to start to become more attuned to the sense of heightened awareness, when you are just in this present moment, is to bring attention to your breath. So, even right now, if you're not driving or doing something like this, take a second, sit down and close your eyes. Bring your attention to your breathing cycle. And you wanna practice just witnessing, just observing whatever is happening. You're not trying to change anything. We're not doing any complex breathing exercise. You're just noticing your breathing cycle. If it's shallow, it's shallow. If it's deep, it's deep. If the breath goes fills the lungs, it fills the lungs. If it goes to the stomach, it goes to the stomach. You're just witnessing. You're becoming very aware with your breath. Then you can even bring your attention to the physical sensation of the air passing in your nostrils or even caressing your upper lip. And just notice it. Breathing in. Breathing out. And as much as you bring your awareness to those sensation to the breathing pattern, you notice that most of the other things in your mind tends to disappear. You stop thinking about other things and you are just very present with yourself. Now, that might be a little bit tricky to implement into a love making session but if you catch yourself getting caught in thought, even in the middle of making love with your partner, try to bring your attention for a second to the breath. That usually also have the element of bringing down the sexual energy a little bit more, which also helped to control and regulate it. But just pay attention, I'm breathing in, breathing out. I'm feeling certain sensations and that will help you to anchor, again, into this present moment and to shift your awareness. After we become present in this moment and shift our awareness from the past, the future or anything which is not here and now. We also want to bring our awareness into our physical body, to be present with ourself, with our sensation, with our physical body. Because when we are getting stuck in our head and we are not really embodying, we're not present with our sensations, we are also cutting off the sexual energy and the flow of energy in our body. And that could bring to all kind of other difficulties and challenges. Things like dryness in the vagina or erection problem with the penis. But when we start to become more embodied when we are present with ourself, we start to feel all of those amazing sensations in our body and the sexual energy can flow to wherever we direct it. And we get a lot of more of this sexual energy in our sexual centers. And we will give you a few more specific exercises of how to do that later on. And you will see that as simple as those exercises are, just by shifting your awareness a little bit, becoming present and attuning to your sensations, there is so much more pleasure to discover. There is so much orgasmic capacity and bliss. And this presence of the sacredness of the space, will reveal itself quite naturally. Another thing which is very common, is that throughout the sexual interaction, a lot of people tends to think about the end goal. They're trying to rush and get into their orgasm. We're doing all of those different things. Whether from the courting, to being with our partners, to the whole sexual interaction, just to get to this one moment there in the end when we have our short moment of orgasm and then it's over. And by doing that, again, we are losing a sense of presence from what is already here, what is already occurring. We are constantly projecting our mind in trying to achieve something instead of being present with ourself and our partner. But just like when you're listening to music or dancing a dance, the point of listening to your favorite song is to get to the end of the song. The best part is not the last note of the composition and then you did it. You read that last note, it's done, it's over. Or when you're dancing, you're not trying to get to a specific place on the dance floor and to finish the dance. It's about this moment of flow, of freedom beyond time and space in this present moment, being with yourself, with your partner, with all the different sensations and this specific, very special and ordinary in the same time, state of mind of just being present. And if you're able to tap into this attitude that we already have naturally, like I said, with music or dance or art, to bring it into our love life, to the way that we make love. We don't care anymore if there's an orgasm in the end or not and, of course, if it's there, it's great. But every moment becomes so fulfilling, so full of joy and connection that you come to see more and more the beauty of the connection, the sacredness of the sexual act. A very simple technique in order to start in bringing more awareness and embodying your physical body, feeling all these different sensations that are actually very much alive and present in every single moment, is start practicing shifting your awareness to different points in your physical body that you're normally not really aware of. So, starting just by yourself when you're, I don't know out and about or when you are sitting alone at your room. Bring your awareness for a second just to the tip of your nose. And you will notice that in a split of a second, all of a sudden you are aware of so many sensations just there. You really need to not think about anything else and just attune your awareness to the tip of your nose. And you will see that there are sensations there. It might be itchy. It might be hot. It might be cold. You might be feeling the path of the breath over there but there are some sensations. And then shift your awareness to the top of your upper lip. And again, you will discover that there are sensations there. And as you do that, it takes a little bit of a practice to sharpen the awareness. You are actually able to scan your entire body. And as you go through your body, you will discover that there's all kind of sensations, everywhere, all along the body. As you continue with this practice, it'll increase your capacity to perceive sensations all along your body. And become much more present with all of those sensations. As well, it will dramatically increase your capacity to experience pleasure, both with your partner and by yourself. When you're making love and you want to become more present with the physical sensations in your body, start to bring your awareness to the point of contact between you and your partner. So, don't necessarily bring your awareness to the tip of your nose, unless you are doing something with it. But try to find the sensations in the contact between you two. If it's in the tip of the fingers, that should be relatively easy. Or, anywhere else where you feel sensation and arousal that are coming out of the interaction. That would usually make the sensations much stronger, much deeper and will also take you and transport you into this sacred space. So, after you became present in this very moment, letting go from the past, from the future, from anything else and the become completely present here. And you're also bringing your awareness and your present with the physical sensation that are rising in your body moment to moment. You also wanna make sure that you are present with your partner. We want to make sure that we are not just present with our own sensations and whatever it is that we wanting to do but we're actually present with them, with their needs, with their sensation, with the flow of what is coming up for them moment to moment and that we're able to co-create together, our love making, our interaction. A very simple way to do that, to make sure that you're attuned with your partner, is simply looking into their eyes. I'm gonna talk a little bit more about ways to do that in one of the next videos but for now, you just want to be able to look softly into their eyes. You're not staring in very seriously or anything like this. You're trying to be as relaxed as possible, connected to your heart and connecting to them, softly gazing into their eyes and still being aware of your physical body, of what is happening in the room between you right now and allowing this sense of presence to carry you together. Even more than that, you can start to pay attention to the breathing cycle of yourself and of your partner. If it doesn't take too much effort and take you out, actually, off the feeling of connection, you can even try to adjust your breathing pattern a little bit to match your partner. And that will create a sense of synchronicity between you two. And you will start to breathe as one. Again, you see all these practices, looking into each other eyes, breathing together, should be done very gently. You don't wanna force. You don't wanna do anything that is feeling too weird or complicated that takes you away, actually, from being present with them. But if you do these practices on a daily basis for a little while, then when you make love, it will come very naturally and effortlessly. And you will just look into each other, breathe together and melt and be present with each other. Putting the effort and doing these little practices of becoming more present with yourself and your partner will allow both of you to come and meet together and create that sense of sacredness. Very much like when two accomplish musicians are coming to improvise and to play together. Each one of them know how to play their own instrument, however, in the same time, they're also very attuned to the other person. There is a certain tempo. There is certain rhythm. There are certain melody that they're playing with. They might go in one direction or another but they're constantly staying attuned to the energy of the room and to their heart desires to co-create something unique and spontaneous that comes together. And in the same way, your love making, this coming together of you and your partner becomes a dance, becomes an artful expression of your love and a celebration of the divine. - Now you may have heard some stories of some people, some Tantrics or some Taoist masters, or practitioners that can orgasm for hours and hours on end. And you may be comparing that to some of the orgasms you've experienced, which for most people last anywhere from three to seven seconds, and wondering how the hell they are doing that. And in this video, I wanna demystify that a little bit, because the key to tapping into longer orgasms is activating our entire body and learning to circulate sexual and orgasmic energy throughout our entire being. So a pillar of sacred sexuality is full body activation versus just localized pleasure. So what happens when most of us either self-pleasure or make love is that we're kind of engaging in the experience from our head up. So we might be a lot in our thinking mind, we might be wondering how our partner's perceiving us or thinking about what we need to do next. And if we're not in our heads, then usually we're only in our genitals. So either we're in our heads or we're just focusing on the intensity in our genitals and just building up energy, building up energy, and then allowing it to explode out. And what happens when we engage with sex from either just our heads or just our heads and our genitals, we're missing out on a whole lot of untapped energy in our body, because we can engage with sex not just from our mind or just from our genitals. We can engage with it from our entire body, from our entire being. So in the ancient wisdom traditions of the East, there is a concept called chakras, which perhaps you have heard about because today in the West it's becoming more and more of a theme in yoga classes or in the conscious communities, there's a lot more workshops or articles where they speak about chakras. But the origin of the chakra system is actually from the Tantric tradition of ancient India. And the chakras are energetic centers on our energetic body. So we have our physical body, but we also have an energetic body. And these centers of energy, each energy governs a certain realm of existence, a certain realm of the universe, a spectrum, or a frequency. And our second chakra, the sacral chakra is related with the sexual energy and with all things that we associate with sex. So magnetism, radiance, emotions, sensuality, sexuality, all of these different aspects are related to the second chakra. And what happens energetically. When we start to get aroused, when we're self-pleasuring or making love is that we can imagine this second chakra like a balloon that has a maximum capacity of energy it can hold. And as we start to get more aroused and we start to build more and more sexual passion in our bodies, this balloon starts to fill up with air. It starts to fill up with energy. And all of the sudden what tends to happen is the balloon has a max capacity and it hits its limit. And what happens in most of us when that happens is that the balloon explodes down and out. So we kind of (imitates balloon deflating). Allow it to explode at the level of our genitals. We have a short peak of pleasure in our genitals. And then usually we feel more depleted afterwards. We will wanna go to sleep or we feel like we're done. And there's just a general kind of peak. And then a drop right after that. Now, the ancient traditions of the East taught us a different way to work with the sexual energy. Instead of building up all this vital life force energy and then allowing it to just expel out and feel drained and depleted, through different practices of breath, visualization, and movement we can actually learn to build up this energy in our second chakra, and then implode it, move it up our entire body and then create more space to be able to build more energy, and then breathe it up and move it up again, and then build up more and breathe it up again. And this is the key to tap into full body orgasms because every time we push this energy up our body, we start to enter into this orgasmic wave. And this is when we start to tap into multiple orgasms where we don't just have a long buildup and then a quick peak and drop. But we start to enter into an orgasmic wave where there's waves of orgasmic energy moving up our being, and we don't deplete our energy. We don't feel tired or done. And that's why you may have heard of stories of people who can keep on orgasming for hours and hours and hours. And a way I like to think about this, like energetically, internally, what an impulsive orgasm. So that would be when we move the energy up, versus an explosive orgasm, when we just build it up and then allow it to release out, the difference energetically in how that feels in our bodies, like saying yes to life or opening ourselves up to life versus saying no. So, when we're building up all this sexual energy and we're full of this life-giving energy, and in the moment of orgasm we kind of push it out and expel it out. It's almost like we're saying no to this energy. We're denying this part of ourselves. Whereas when we tap into these impulses of orgasms, it's like, we're saying, "Yes, yes, and more please!" We're opening ourselves up to become vessels for this energy of life to radiate up our entire being. So this is a core energetic difference in how we relate to sexuality in a sacred sexual practice. We don't just build up energy and then explode it out and go to sleep or feel drained, but we build it up. And we radiate it up our entire being. We allow it to really rise up our spine and create a full body activation, a full body orgasm where we don't just feel pleasure at the level of our genitals, but our entire being is vibrating with our orgasmic energy, every cell of our being vibrating with that sexual energy. And that's when we start to tap into full body orgasms. Now, how do you practically do that? There's many different ways to start circulating energy in order to activate your entire body. The first one is through movement. So if we're standing still like a board or we're just like generically stimulating our vagina or our penis in a very like mechanical way and only focusing there and not moving the rest of our body, usually what happens is the energy stays localized. Whereas when we start to move the rest of our body and when we start to activate all of the different parts of our body through movement, naturally, you'll notice that the energy will start to spread and you won't just feel pleasure in the level of your genitals but you'll start to feel it in your entire body. Sexual energy moves in fluid ways. Sometimes in some ancient traditions it's represented like a snake. So try to think about the movements that a snake would make. So more undulating movements or circular motions. These are all really good ways to help the sexual energy move throughout your body. Another great way to move sexual energy is through your mind and visualization. So sometimes there's like a misconception that the mind is like the enemy. And like, we need to stop being in our minds and we just need to be in our bodies, but our minds can help us with our embodiment practices. So it's not that we need to completely like, shut down the mind and just be in the body. Our mind can become our ally, because through our mind, wherever our attention goes, wherever our mind goes, energy flows. So if in a sexual experience, we're fully focusing on our genitals, the energy will stay in our genitals. And that's what most of us naturally do when we get aroused or horny. All of our attention is just on the sensation and the genitals. Whereas when we start to visualize that the energy's moving up into our heart, into our third eye or into our crown chakra, what naturally happens is that the energy starts to move as well. And you can try this very practically next time you're self-pleasuring or making love. Just shift your awareness from your genitals to your heart. So just bring your mind into your heart and visualize all of your awareness in the center of your heart. And you'll notice that the energy will start to shift. It will move away from just lust and horniness and will tap into a more open sense of love or devotion or compassion. So you can play with that in your own body. And during love making, just playing with moving your mind and visualizing the energy, moving to different centers of your body to help you move the energy to different centers. Another great way to move sexual energy is through touch. So instead of just touching your genitals or your main erogenous zones during lovemaking, also touching the rest of your body. So touching up your belly, your breast, your neck, your hair, you can do this to yourself, or it's even more beautiful when you can do it with your partner and you can help each other. So when you notice your partner is getting really aroused and the energy is really centered in his genitals or her genitals, you can help them move it by touching the rest of their body. So maybe stroking up the center of their chest, or pulling their hair a little bit, or touching their hands or their arms to help them spread the energy. And lastly, one of the most effective, and most powerful, and most tangible ways to move sexual energy is through breath work. And I'm not gonna go into this much now because we actually have an entire module dedicated just to different breathwork techniques to help you both build sexual energy and then also help you circulate it in different ways. So in the next module you'll learn all about breathwork and you'll learn very specific breathwork techniques that you can call upon during lovemaking or self-pleasuring to help you tap into full-body orgasmic experiences. - The next principle that you want to incorporate into your sacred sexuality, attitude and love making is learning to or better said trying to remember how to see with the eyes of the heart. So, in our day to day habitual behavior, in our relationships with people, we tend to see them for their personality, the way that they act, they behave, what they do for us, their job, their function. And in some way we reduce them to know more than the sum of their parts. We don't really do that mentally, we don't think about it, but when we look at the way that we relate to people, there is something very functional about it. And we become very habituated, oh, it's just mom there, or Joe, or Mario, whoever. And we forget that there is a sense of magic, there is a spark in each heart which shines the light of the divine consciousness and the same spark also shines in our hearts. We tend to judge and condemn and just forget to look for and see this inherent beauty which is in every single person in every moment of creation. But there is a different way we can look deeper, we can remember how to see with the eyes of the heart, with a soft and open heart, looking for the essence of that being, looking at the soul level if you want, not in any cheesy way, but really looking for the sense of that being in the same way that you can feel your own essence and trying to connect on that level. When you do that, when you are reaching somewhere deeper inside of you and looking for something deeper in the other person, everything in your experience tend to shift. The way that you see them is no more as this person or that person, but you see this divine essence which is reflecting your own inner being. There is a sense of beauty, of joy, you are immediately are completely present in that moment, you are in a state of flow. There is a sense of admiration, beauty, and bliss. You definitely don't care anymore about all kind of like pity fights that you might had throughout the day or something that you didn't like that they did before, or something aesthetically about them that you might not necessarily appreciate. And instead of that, there is a flowing of gratitude of being in the presence of that divine being, and again, in a way which is not differentiated from your own true essence. All right, so you might say that all sounds great but how do I do this? I don't really find this moment of complete magic between me and my partner, or maybe it used to be like that but we somehow lost it throughout the years. Well, I think that there's still some places in your life that you are naturally inclined to do that to see with the eyes of the heart, to think about life in a more poetic and open way. One place that most of us tend to naturally do that is in our relationship with nature. So if you are able go out to nature a little bit, walk in the forest, sit on the beach, try to find a flower and just look at it moment, open yourself up. You cannot reduce the flower, its beauty to the number of the pedals or how exactly it's arranged. I mean, there is an element to that as well but the flower is so much more. There is an essence, a fragrance which can touch you in ways that we cannot reduce into words. As well when you watch a sunset or a sunrise, there could be a sense of, oh, a magnificent of colors. And there's a sense of openness and you're going into a state of flow. In the same way when you are with your partner, when you're looking at them, when you're looking into their eyes, try to bring that attitude, the same attitude that you had when you looked at this beautiful flower and seeing as the flower opening, also your heart tends to open, as the sunrise, so does your heart. And in the same way, looking at your partner, seeing that divine essence, this magnificent beauty, which goes beyond any kind of characteristic that has to do with the essence of their heart will transform you, your place, your complete experience, and in that way, this energy, that sense of presence and the openness of the heart will also transform your partner. Even if your partner is not in that space in that moment, just by tapping into that resonance of the heart, seeing them in a way which is even more than what they see themselves in this moment will help them to transform and to drop into that place and start radiating and being that thing that you are seeing in that moment. And as you and your partner are going deeper and deeper into that space of the heart, seeing each other in your true essence, you might feel a sense of nostalgia in that moment, a feeling of romanticism, there is so much beauty and gratitude that is just flowing through you and space and time is completely being altered. I mean, there are no words that can really encapsulate or capture that state of being that state of mind that you can drop into when you connect on that level. But as more as you'll do it, the more apparent it'll become to you. And that sense of sacredness will impermeate and transform every aspect of your life. - The next pillar of sacred sexuality is surrender. And this is really the magical ingredient, the magical last key to drop into deep experiences. Because even if we're doing all the other things right, we're fully present, and our whole body's activated, and we're breathing deeply, and we're doing all the things, but mentally we're afraid to surrender, mentally we're trying to stay in control or to control how the sexual energy is moving in our body, we won't tap into a deeper orgasmic experience because surrender is the gateway. And a lot of the times when we have sex or self-pleasure, there's this idea that orgasm is something to get at the end of the finish line. So it's kind of like we're racing, we're like quickly doing everything to get more and more aroused, so hopefully we can have that orgasm at the end of the finish line. But orgasm is not something to get at the end of a sexual experience. Orgasm is a state. It's a frequency that we can tap into at every given moment. And the portal, the key, to tap into orgasm at any given point is utter and complete surrender. So asking yourself during love making or self-pleasure when you feel like there's a lot of energy but you're not really tapping into an orgasmic experience, asking yourself, how could I let go more in this moment? How could I surrender more? How could I open more? Maybe it's breathing in a certain way, maybe it's moving your body in a certain way, but really invoking that internal state of surrender. It's like you're letting go of the limited notion of who you think you are and opening yourself up to the vastness of who you truly are at your core. And surrender is a tricky one because it's not one that I can give you a one, two, three technique for or do this for five seconds and this for 10 seconds, and then there you have it, this is surrender. Because surrender is an internal attitude. It's an internal shift. It's about letting go of our need to stay in control and really trusting, opening, surrendering, allowing life to ravish you. And sometimes it's easier in the beginning to feel like we're surrendering to our partner or to the love that we feel for our partner, but the invitation here is to go even deeper than that and really to surrender to the fullness of life itself. So don't just surrender to the pleasure or to the sensation. You can do this in the beginning if it helps you but try to tap into a deeper surrender, really a surrender where you feel like you're opening yourself up for the flow of the universe to move through your being. And once you can master this inner attitude, once you can really surrender on such a profound level, you'll start to tap into orgasmic experiences that simply cannot compare with just superficial physical orgasms because this is where we start to tap into spiritual experiences where we really feel like we come back home to ourselves through the essence of who we truly are, where we let go of this sense of separation between you and me or us and the world, but we really experience the underlying oneness of everything. And a gentle suggestion, if you notice that it's difficult for you to surrender, if you notice that when you feel a lot of intensity in your body, you kind of just wanna stay in control and you have a fear of really allowing yourself to let go and to open, you can actually use the heat, the fire of the sexual energy to help you melt through that resistance. So if you feel some resistance coming up or you feel a little bit stuck, visualize all the heat, the fire of the sexual energy, moving into those stuck places and kind of melting them open. If you want you could even visualize the sexual energy moving to those stuck places and just allowing you to kind of melt, like lava melting open more deeply. So if you feel resistance, that's very normal, and it's not something that's easy. Sometimes we think surrendering is like the easiest thing ever. It just means like, oof, here I am, I'm surrendered. But it's not. Surrender is an act of choice, and it's an act of practice. It's not something passive. It's something that we have a choice to tap into an every single a moment. So if resistance comes up, just meet it, notice it, and then see if you can breathe more deeply into that resistance. If you can dance and move with the resistance. If you can allow the heat of the sexual energy to slowly start to melt the resistance until you can fully open and let go. - In this video, I'll be talking about a concept called self intimacy and the word self intimacy sometimes is a little bit surprising to people because usually we associate intimacy with another person, being intimate with another person. But we cannot truly deeply be intimate with another person until we've been deeply intimate with ourself. And especially when it comes to sexual intimacy, we can't fully meet another sexually if we haven't met ourselves. And unfortunately, that's how a lot of us are engaging with sex because we haven't been taught to really explore our bodies, to discover our sexual blueprint, to spend time to self-pleasure and learn how to play this magical instrument of our bodies. Most of us haven't been taught that or haven't been told that that's important. So we go into sexual experiences without having that deep connection to ourselves first. And what happens when two people don't have a full cup, when we're not fully connected to ourself and have this profound sense of self intimacy, is that we go into sexual experiences needing something from the other person or putting a lot of expectations on the other person. Perhaps we're putting the pressure on our intimate partners that they should figure out how to make us orgasm or that they are responsible for our sexual experiences. And if we don't have its sexual experiences, then it means that they didn't do a good job. And of course, there's no black and white and there's always a co-creation at play. But the idea in sacred sexuality is that two or more because why not more if you want, but let's say two people come together from a full cup so that their cup is over flowing and they can share their essence with each other during love making. So it's not two people who are coming from an empty cup needing something from each other but it's two beings that have cultivated such a sense of self intimacy and fullness that they're overflowing. And from that place of overflowing, they can connect without any expectation, without needing anything from the other, but just from the pure joy of sharing their sexual essence with one another. Now, how do you cultivate self intimacy when it comes to sexuality? One of the best ways is to dedicate time to get to know your body, to discover how your body works, what turns you on, what helps you open, what doesn't work so well for you, so you can really learn to play the instrument of your body. Just like a musician, having a violin for 10 years doesn't mean you'll know how to play it. You actually have to actively practice with it in order to know how to play it well. And the same thing applies to our body and to our sexual being. We are born with it but unless we take the time to learn how to play it, we don't necessarily know how to make music with it. And if we don't know how can we expect our partners to know for us? Once we become deeply intimate with our own body and our own sexual blueprint, we can come into sexual experiences from a much more empowered place where we can actually guide our partners as to how to play our instruments. So then we are not just living at the mercy of like hoping we'll find that magical person who will unlock the keys to our bodies and open a sub to profound spiritual experiences but we can do so ourselves and then from that place of self knowing, we can guide our partners as to how to play our instrument. And when two people come together from that deep place of connection to their sexual power and their sexual energy, the sexual experience becomes so much more powerful. And another element to cultivating self intimacy besides just first of all discovering and learning how to play your body is also doing practices to fill your own sexual cup. So not relying just on sexual experiences with others to fill our sexual cup but learning to do so ourselves. So doing practices like working with a yoni egg or pussy breathing or lingam breathing or dancing or any kind of embodiment practices that get you into your body, that get your juices flowing so every time you meet your partner, you're doing so from a full place. So I already mentioned a few good sexual solo practices like working with a yoni egg, doing different types of sexual breathing techniques that you'll learn in the next module, lingam massage, yoni massage, embodiment practices, dance, shaking, chingong, any kind of energy based practices. But the most, in my opinion, effective one is cultivating a devoted self-pleasure practice. And a lot of the times we self-pleasure or masturbate when we're not in a relationship but the second we get in a relationship, usually we forget about it or we don't prioritize it because we have a partner to have sex with. But I'm a strong believer that especially when we in a relationship, we should prioritize our self-pleasuring practice because that is the only way to ensure that we are filling our own cup, that we are learning to self source pleasure so we can really come into our sexual experience with so much more power to give each other. So we're not like scraping for orgasm or pleasure for them to give us something but we're both showing up fully, meeting each other on such a deep place and really sharing and overflowing our sexual essence with one another. So the next audio meditation is here as a little ritual and I invite you to do it after this video now that you've heard about self intimacy and it's here as a first step. A first step to start to connect to yourself, to your genitals, to your sex center. And this is kind of the initiation and from there I invite you to really make a commitment to cultivate a self-pleasure practice or to work with a yoni egg or to give a lingam massage or yoni massage to yourself, and to really prioritize cultivating solo sexual experiences in order to enhance your partnered experiences. ♪ Let's talk about breath, baby ♪ ♪ Let's talk about you and me ♪ - Ow! - Our breath is a carrier of life force energy. The first thing we do when we enter into the world, when we are born, is we take a breath of life in. And the last thing we do at the end of our journey, when we die, is take a breath out. So our breath is literally the carrier of life force energy. And our breath is also deeply connected to our sexual energy. So in this module you'll be learning different breathwork techniques both to build and activate more sexual energy so you have more fuel to work with. And then also some breathwork techniques to move, to circulate sexual energy throughout your being. As you learned earlier, a very important aspect if we want to learn to tap into deeper, implosive, more mystical orgasms, is to learn to move our sexual energy throughout our body. So it doesn't just stay localized in the level of the genitals, but we can actually tap into full body ecstatic states. And breathwork is one of the easiest and most tangible ways to do that. - Alright, so let's make a short experiment, so try to be as spontaneous as you can. And for the next three seconds, for a whole three seconds, try to stop thinking. Alright, that will do. Now, try to notice what happened. What did you actually do in order to stop thinking? Did, by any chance, you find that you held your breath? - I did. (laughs) - Well, there is a very strong correlation between our mind, the way that we direct our thoughts, our intention, our awareness, our breath, and sexual energy. By modulating one of them, we usually can shift or influence very dramatically the two others. Try to think for a second. How do you breathe when you're just on the verge of an explosive orgasm? You start to breathe fast, you start to breathe more. (Aida breathing heavily) Yeah, something like that, right? And you see that the breath becomes a bit more shallow and rapid, and there is intensity. And also in the moment before orgasm, there is a moment of void. (Aida gasping and sighing) - Yeah, you usually hold your breath for a second and then it comes. So again, this is just to show that there is a very clear correlation between the way that you breathe, how you're breathing, and the way that the sexual energy moves through you. So, by regulating your breath, by breathing slower and deeper or faster and more shallow, by holding your breath in a full retention or in a void retention, you can really shift the way that the sexual energy moves. You can actually delay the orgasm if you wish to or try to bring it faster. You can go deeper, you can go faster. And each way that you're gonna shift your breath will give you a different result. - And just to reiterate what Solar just said, it's not about only breathing in one particular way, 'cause again, a common misconception when we think sacred sexuality is we think that it's only very slow and deep breaths. And that's definitely one breathwork technique and that can actually help us relax into intensity, relax into peaks of pleasure so we can go into orgasmic waves instead of just having a short explosion. But we actually want to learn to work with all different types of breathwork rhythms. So as you'll learn in the breathwork techniques, some of the techniques specifically to build and activate more sexual fire are a bit more intense, a bit more rapid, a bit more shallow, even. Whereas some of the techniques to circulate the energy are more full breaths that go along with visualization to help you circulate the energy. So in this module you'll learn a range of different breathwork techniques and the idea is that you play between the different ones. So if you start to feel a bit dull or you start to feel like your arousal is going down, you wanna do some activating breath to get more sexual energy generated in your body. Whereas when you feel like you're tensing and you're starting to build a lot of sexual energy just in the level of the genitals and you feel like you're on the verge of an explosive orgasm, in that moment you actually wanna breathe more fully, more deeply and do some of the other breathwork techniques you'll learn to circulate the energy. - So, beside building energy or stopping the energy from building up, you can also start to move the energy with the breath from your genitals to the rest of the body. And then instead of having a localized orgasm, that can bring you into a full body expansive orgasm. And finally, and maybe the most profound, at least in my opinion, is that through the breath work and working with the sexual energy and directing your mind, you can reach into very deep and profound and mystical states of consciousness together with your partner. - And this module is something that you can start to implement right away in your self-pleasuring or in your love-making. So even if you don't have the time to do all of the different rituals or maybe your partner is not really interested to do the rituals with you, I hope that that's not the case but sometimes one partner is more drawn to this type of work and these type of practices than the other. So if that's the case, just implementing these breathwork techniques by yourself during self-pleasuring or love-making is already gonna create profound shifts and transformations in the way that you move your sexual energy and the way that you experience orgasm. So that's just to say that you can do this together with your partner during love-making but even if one partner is not interested in doing these different breathwork techniques, if you do them, the interesting thing you'll notice because you're in resonance and harmony with your partner, especially when you're making love, is that by you internally moving and circulating your own energy you'll be helping your partner to do the same. And practically for this module, I suggest that you do each breathwork technique with us, its follow-along practices in just an un-aroused state, just so you can get the hang of it and that it comes clear how to do the breathwork technique. So then when you're in a more aroused or erotic situation, either self-pleasuring or making love, you can easily call on the different techniques because you've already practiced them once before. (gentle music) - [Narrator] Begin by sitting in a comfortable cross-legged or kneeling position. Elongate your spine, root your sitting bones. Take of few deep breaths here, becoming fully present. Letting go of anything that may have happened up until this point, and fully arriving in the here and now. Now place your hands in a downward triangle on your lower belly and visualize your sexual organs, either physically or energetically, underneath your hands. And gently start to deepen your breath. Starting to breathe in through your mouth and out through your mouth. Allowing the breath to come all the way down into your lower belly, pushing your hands outwards as you're breathing life force energy into your genitals, and then exhaling fully, releasing, letting go. Inhaling in through the mouth. Following the breath all the way down into your belly, into your genitals, visualizing your genitals filling up with vibrant life force energy, and exhaling fully through the mouth. (sighing) And repeating this a few more times, following the rhythm of your own breath, breathing in and out through the mouth as you visualize the life force energy of your breath filling every little crevice of your genitals. And now I'll invite you to add in some hip movements to generate even more sexual energy. So with each in breath and out breath, rocking your hips forward and backwards and starting to can your breath, generating more heat, more intensity, more sexual fire. (sighing) And feel free to make any sounds, any primal sounds, any moans. Anything that wants to express through your voice in this moment. Keep breathing in and out of your mouth quickly, visualizing the sexual energy building in the level of your genitals with each inhale, more life force energy coming into your sex center, with each exhale, feeling yourself becoming more free, more wild, more liberated. (panting) And then gently starting to slow down the breath. In through the mouth and out through the mouth. Slowly finding your way back to inner and outer stillness. And taking a few moments to do a body scan and noticing how you are feeling after this practice. Noticing the heat and energy at the level of your genitals, the activation of the sexual primal energy. And concluding with one more deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth. (gentle music) - [Narrator] Begin by sitting on the edge of a chair with your testicles hanging freely. Take a few moments just to make sure that you're really comfortable and also ensure that your spine is upright and straight. Feel the connection to the ground underneath your feet. And the connection with your spine and your crown and the infinite sky above you. And bring your awareness down into your testicles. And visualize them vibrating with life force energy. Gently begin to deepen your breath, breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth fully. And as you breathe in, visualize the breath of life filling up your testicles with vibrating energy. And as you exhale, fully let go. Inhale, follow the breath into your chest, your belly, all the way down into your testicles, filling them with energy and exhaling out through the mouth fully. Inhaling from the nose, into your testicles. If you want, you can pause here for a second, just to feel that fullness. And exhaling fully from the mouth. And slowly starting to intensify this breathing pattern. So inhaling through the nose and exhaling through the mouth more fiercely, with more power, really feeling yourself, feeling your testicles with power, with energy, with life force. Keep on following the rhythm of your own breath in through the nose, out through the mouth, in through the nose, out through the mouth. And if you want, you can add some big arm movements to help you tap into this breath. We're really focusing on building sexual energy here, filling your testicles with vibrating sexual energy. So inhale, open the chest, exhale, contract your chest, inhale, open the chest, exhale, contract the chest, and keep going, following the rhythm of your own breath. (breathing) Feel free to make any sounds. Any primal sounds, any screams, whatever wants to express through you. Each inhale building more sexual energy. Each exhale liberating yourself one step deeper. And gently slowing down the breath, coming back to inner and outer stillness. Taking a few moments to notice how you feel after this practice, bringing your awareness down into your genitals, feeling all this heat, this energy, this power that you just generated. Knowing that this power is always available to you right here through the power of your breath and intention. And concluding with one last deep inhale through the nose and deep exhale through the mouth. (ethereal music) - [Narrator] Begin by sitting in a comfortable, cross-legged position. Take a deep breath in through your nose and out through your mouth, feeling the connection with your sitting bone, with the ground beneath you, then elongating your spine towards the heavens above you. And gently bring your awareness down to your genitals and visualize a vibrant ball of light radiating in your sex center, representing your sexual energy. And with your next inhale, inhale fully into your genitals, amplifying the energy and visualizing this ball expanding, and as you exhale, squeeze your pelvic floor muscles as you visualize the energy moving up the back of your spine all the way up your crown into the infinite sky above you. So inhale, breathe deeply into your genitals, expanding this ball of light, this ball of sexual energy, and as you exhale, squeeze your pelvic floor muscles as you lift this energy all the way up the back of your spine, all the way out the center of your head into the sky above you. Inhale, breathe into your genitals, expand your sexual energy, create more fuel. Exhale, squeeze and lift all of this energy up your body all the way up the crown of your head. And repeat this a few more times, following the rhythm of your own breath. So with each inhale, it's like you're generating more sexual energy in the level of your genitals, and with each exhale, you're pushing that energy up your energetic structure all the way up to the crown of your head, feeling this energy become less and less localized and more and more expansive, radiating up your entire body. Repeating this a few more times. Then, gently coming to stillness, breathing normally, and noticing how you feel. Perhaps more expanded, more open, more light. And remembering that this is a practice you could call on at any point during your self-pleasuring or love-making experiences. When you start to notice that the sexual energy is stuck at the level of your genitals, you can do a few of these expanding breaths to help you move this energy up your spine and expand it into a full-body experience. (chime ringing) - [Narrator] Begin by sitting in a comfortable seating position, ensuring that your back is upright and straight, and place your tongue at the top of your palette. Next, bring your awareness down to your genitals and begin to visualize your sexual energy. If you are in an aroused state, this may be slightly easier, but even if not, just visualize the potential sexual energy at the level of your genitals. (gentle meditative music) And with your next inhale, visualize yourself breathing this energy down towards your perineum and back up to back of your spine, all the way to the top of your head, your forehead, your nose, and ending at the top of your palette. And as you exhale, visualize the energy circling back down the front of your body from your palette down into your chest, your belly, and back down to where you started at the level of your genitals. Again, inhaling down towards the perineum and up the back of your spine, all the way to the back of the head, the top of the head, your forehead, until you've reached your pallet. And then exhaling down the front of your body until you are, again, where you started. And repeating this a few more times, following the rhythm of your own breath and really visualizing that you're generating this orbit throughout your entire body, circulating the energy all the way down into your perineum, up the back of your spine, and all the way down the front of your body. (gentle meditative music) And slowly coming to a stop. And doing a short body scan for a moment, scanning your body all the way from your toes up to the crown of your head. And noticing how you feel. Perhaps you feel more activated, more expanded, more alive. This is the key to activating and accessing full body orgasms, taking the sexual energy out of the genitals and circulating them throughout your entire being. This is another breath technique that you can call upon during self-pleasuring or love making when you want to move the energy through your body. And it's a beautiful practice to also do together with your partner doing love making so you're both circulating the sexual energy throughout your bodies. And now to conclude, visualizing all of the energy you generated, anchoring back in the center of your navel, your center of power, knowing that it's always available for you, right here, in your very own body. - So for this next breath work technique there's a few different ways that you can practice it. The first one is just to sit in front of your partner and hold each other's hands. Another way is to sit in a position called yab-yum. In which one partner sits in a cross-legged position. And then the other partner sits on top of them and hooks their legs around their partner's like this. Just taking a few moments to make sure you're comfortable, so this is the second way. And the third way is to do the breathing technique during penetrative love making. So you could be in any position or you could even be in yab-yum but with penetration. Now this breath work technique in the beginning can be a little bit more tricky to get into because both partners have a different breathing pattern. So it takes a little bit more awareness to attune yourself to your partner's breath to ensure that you're doing the technique correctly. - So in this case, I'm the partner penetrating and Ida is the receiving partner. So I'm gonna inhale, focusing on the area of my chest. So as if receiving the energy from her heart, into my heart, then inhaling, following the breath and the energy down my body to the area of my sex. And then from my sex to hers. Then Ida will be inhaling from her sex, receiving the energy, breathing up her body and then exhaling through her heart, in which I will be receiving the energy, inhaling again from my heart and down to my sex. - So in this way, we're creating an orbit where we're giving each other our breath. It's like with my exhale, I'm giving my breath into his heart and with his exhale, he's giving his sex into my sex. So the easiest way to tap into this is if the penetrative partner starts by breathing and the receptive partner just becomes aware of their breath. And once you notice the pattern of their breath and you feel like you are synchronized with them, then you can start to add in your breathing pattern because if you do it at the same time sometimes you're both inhaling or both exhaling. And as a receptive partner you wanna inhale when your partner is exhaling. So now a I'll let do the breathing technique by himself for a few moments. (gentle music) (breathing) And now with his next exhale, I will inhale through my sex. And that's the energy circuit breath. And as you'll notice when you start to practice it with your partner, it's really beautiful because you're not only moving your own energies in your own body, but you're actually creating an orbit where you're really synchronizing both of your bodies and both of your sexual energies together. - One of the most common misconceptions around sacred sexuality is that it must look a certain way. A lot of the times when people think of the word sacred sexuality, right away there's kind of this like cliche image that comes in our minds of two people gazing into each other's eyes and making love very, very slowly and gently. And that's definitely one expression that sacred sexuality can take, but sacred sexuality embraces the totality, the fullness of different sexual expressions. So it's not to say that like slow, gentle sex is sacred and then passionate, wild sex is not sacred, but actually seeing all the different sexual expressions as coming from that same divine force. And we all have our own unique preferences, just like with food. There's usually certain foods that we really, really like, and then some foods that we're kind of neutral about, and then some foods that we really don't like. The same thing applies to different sexual expressions. Most of us naturally have a certain type of expression that we're very drawn to, that comes very naturally to us. And then perhaps we have the other ones that we can tap into, but they feel more neutral and maybe even other ones that we don't like so much. But the thing is that when it comes to sexuality, we oftentimes get stuck in one expression. So maybe it's the way that we kind of learned to make love or how we made love with some of our first partners, and it kind of became just a pattern, a blueprint that we're operating from. So maybe, let's say, if you like very passionate sex, maybe that's the only type of sexual experiences that you've had. And that's not to say that there's anything wrong with that specific type of sexual expression, but the invitation in this module is to start to expand your sexual repertoire. So being able to tap into different sexual expressions at will so you're like a painter that has access to more colors to paint a beautiful painting with. Now there's so many different categories that we could use to kind of box in different sexual expressions, and it's not like one of them is the one and the other ones are false. There's just many different ways to categorize those things. But for the sake of simplicity and to make it very accessible, in this course we'll be categorizing the different sexual expressions according to the elements of nature. And that's because it's naturally something that we can very easily relate to as will become very clear to you in the next videos. Each element of nature has a certain quality, and that quality can be expressed through our sexuality. And by diving deeply into all of these different frequencies, these different spectrums of sexual expression, we can start to expand the way that we can express our sexual energy and share it with another. Now, it's not to say that after this module you're gonna love all of them equally and combine them all in your love making in the same percentage. There's definitely still gonna be probably your dominant sexual expression. But the invitation here is just to expand your sexual repertoire and to open to the possibility that perhaps you may discover a certain sexual expression that you hadn't played around with before and discover that it really works for you and your partner. It's also great if you feel a little bit stuck. I have a lot of clients and students who say that they enjoy love making, they enjoy sex, but they kind of want to explore something different, but they feel a little bit shy. They feel a little bit inhibited to go there, especially if they've had a long-term partner. Let's say they have a very like slow and romantic and loving way to make love, and one partner has the desire to experiment with something a little bit more wild and primal. Sometimes, especially if we're with long-term partners, we can feel a little bit shy to like initiate that change, especially if we're used to making love in a certain pattern. So this module will be great for you to do with your partner in that case because each video is gonna be zooming in on one expression. And the invitation is after each video to dedicate an entire self-pleasuring or lovemaking session with your partner to really dive into the expression of that element. So in that way, you can see it like homework. So after each video, you implement what you learned as the qualities of that element, and you bring it into your self-pleasuring or your love making. And knowing beforehand that maybe you're gonna love it, maybe you're gonna feel really silly, maybe both of you and your partner are really gonna be into it and get surprised by it, but just see it as homework and see it as something playful you're experimenting. So in order to get the most out of this module, you wanna watch each element, and after watching the element, you wanna dedicate an entire self-pleasuring or making session to diving just into that expression. And then at the very end of the module, we'll be sharing a ritual with you where you'll be combining those different expressions, those different elements of nature through your sexual expression because the idea is not that we only wanna be operating on one. It's just helpful in the beginning so you really get the resonance, the feel of that element in your body. But in the long run, you want to be like a painter that can paint with different colors. So you can play between wild, passionate, soft, airy, romantic, and you could really make like a dance out of your love making, where there's different parts and different nuances. And it just helps you become a better lover and helps you tap into a more vast range of energy. So with that, let's jump into the elements, and we'll be starting with the earth element. - [Lecturer] To begin our journey with the elements, we'll start with our first element, which will be the earth element. The earth represent everything which is heavy, solid, dense, dry, and it's have that capacity of cohesion, of bringing things together. When it comes to expressing the qualities of the earth element through touch, the first thing that we see is a type of touch which is more slow, is more gradual, it's steady. There's something very grounding about working with earth element in the way that we touch. This more heavy way of touching, this more slow and grounding tends to bring a feeling of safety, and this is why it's really nice to start the interaction with this more slow and earthy touch because in this very beginning properties of the earth element, we can see that the quality of touch tends to resemble more, something like a massage, something that is not necessarily very sexual yet, at least. And that brings a feeling of safety and connection. - [Lecturer] Now the main qualities of the earth element when it comes to sexuality are primal, animalistic, raw, and wild. So these are all words that most of us would associate with the quality of earth, and a good way to picture what sexuality on the earth element looks like, is to imagine how tribal people make love or how cavemen used to make love, or even how animals make love, this very primal, very animalistic, very raw, very wild way of expressing our sexual desire. Now, what can activate this feeling, this energy in your love making, is things like hunter and prey role-play. So where one of you plays kind of like the hunter and the other, the prey, and it's like you are ravishing your partner like animals would be making love. There's this element of raw fucking associated with the earth element, also things like sniffing your partner, sniffing their armpit, and that's because the sense of smell in ancient traditions is related with our root chakra, which is related to the element of earth. So sniffing your partner and getting turned on by the smell of your partner is also a very earthy expression of sexuality. Another fun way to activate this element is through biting. So again, invoking this element of a bit more like animals making love, so biting each other's back or each other's neck and really activating that more animalistic quality. Another one is growling. So when we express our pleasure, adding more animal sounds like the sound of a tiger or a lion. Those are all different things that will activate this quality of earth within your sexual expression. - [Lecturer] When it comes to coming into resonance and expressing our sexuality with the idea of the elements, we can also use sexual positions to help us get more into the mood. Now, it's important to remember it very much like the way that we touch also here with the body position, with the sexual position. It's not necessarily that one position is specifically activating this element and another position, another element, but it's much more about the inner attitude, the subtle qualities in our attitude when we interact, but there are still some sexual positions that tend to get us more into one mood or another. When it comes to this more primal, animalistic, earthy expression of sexuality, every position that will allow this attitude of more hard fucking when there is big movement, when we feel the bodies almost slamming into each other, when we can hear the movement almost like we're trying to break the bed. And maybe one of the most obvious positions that will allow us to do that, that's doggy style. - [Lecturer] Doggy style naturally tends to bring out a more primal aspect of sexuality. It also allows for a biting of the back or grabbing of the hair in an animalistic way, and it's a very fun position to play with this hunter and prey role-play as well. Another great position for the earth element, is missionary where the person on the bottom has their legs up usually around the neck of their partner. This allows for deeper penetration and can also start to activate a more primal energy. And lastly, cowgirl while squatting where the person on top being penetrated is sitting in a squatting position and kind of squatting up and down on their partner's genitals. This again, creates more of this like slamming feeling and feels very intense, feels very primal, and feels very raw. Now, another type of sexuality, which is associated with the element of earth, which is not just a position so to say, 'cause you could do it in many positions, but that is anal sex, and that's because anal sex is also associated with our root center, which is associated with the element of earth, and anal sex, generally activates a more earthy, primal energy in our being, anal orgasms also tend to feel very, very wild and primal. So that is another fun thing to experiment with if you want to get a flavor of what this earth element feels like in sexuality. - [Lecturer] Now, after hearing the descriptions of the expression of sexuality related to the earth element, you might already have a bit of an idea if this is something that you like or not. Did you felt horny when you heard the descriptions of the sexuality with earth element? Or maybe not at all. Either way, we really recommend that you'll take a minute to contemplate it a little bit deeper, and if you can also go and explore, try to see how this expression comes out through you and if you enjoy it or not, and after you play and explore it, then move to the next element. - [Narrator 1] The next element in our journey is the water element. And when we're in resonance with the water element or sexuality expressed with this element, tends to be very much what we perceive in the mainstream as sexuality in general or what we see in Hollywood movies. The main qualities of sexuality resonating with the water element, is first of all of something which is very sensual. We activate all of our senses, there is a lot of sensual pleasure. All the senses are being activated, the site, the smell, the touch, but maybe more than all of them together, we have the activation of the sense of taste. There is something very juicy about the interaction. You can even close your eyes for a second and visualize or imagine very yummy, delicious fruit being squeezed, and you can feel the juices running and see how it activates you sexually. Obviously there's something very wet about the sexual interaction. Rather we're making love in the shower, maybe it's the French kissing and the saliva, or maybe it's the body fluids, rather the genital fluids or just a lot of sweat as we're sliding on top of each other, there is this sense of fluidity in the movement. If with the earth element we felt that the bodies are a little bit slamming against each other, here we're flowing together like two rivers going together into the sea. And you can see that there is this general sense of romanticism. So, the general atmosphere is very romantic, we enjoy candle lights, soft music, nice bedsheets, and maybe some yummy fruits, a little bit of chocolate, strawberry, grapes, and all the good romantic things that we would associate from a Hollywood sex scene. - [Narrator 2] Now when it comes to the type of touch on the water element, it's quite different than the type of touch on the earthy element. So on the earthy element the touch was more grounding, more heavy, more primal, whereas in the water element the touch is a lot more sensual. And one of the best ways to get a more sensual type of touch or sensual massage is by using a lot of oil. So, any type of massage or touch where there's a lot of oil or a lot of lubrication between your hands and the partner's body, is something which will naturally elicit the quality of water. Now, one really fun way to play with this is through body sliding. So, this is where one partner covers themselves in oil and then slide sensually over their partner. This is a great way to activate the water element because not only is there obviously a very wet quality to it because you're drenched in oil, but it also activates a lot of fluidity and sensuality. And one type of body sliding in particular, which is because from quite popular over the years is Nuru massage. So this is very similar to body sliding but in Nuru massage usually there's a type of seaweed gel that's used that creates a very slippery and slimy texture that you can pour all over each other's bodies and slide over each other over a plastic sheet. So if you really wanna have fun in experimenting with the element of water in your sexuality, I definitely recommend trying this out at least once. Now some things that activate this water element in love making is things that most of us naturally associate with sexuality because it's things that most of us see in Hollywood sex scenes. So things like French kissing, so kissing with a lot of tongue, with a lot of saliva, where there's a lot of fluid exchange is naturally going to activate the element of water. Not only because it's juicy and wet, but also because it activates the sense of taste which is also related with the watery element. Things like licking, whether it's licking each other's lips or licking each other's nipples, or of course also licking each other's genitals which takes me to the next point which is oral sex. Oral sex naturally activates a lot of the water element because generally it's something which is very wet and juicy. Now, oral sex could also be more fiery because we would have oral sex in a more dry and friction like manner, but if oral sex is done with a lot of saliva, then that's definitely something that's going to activate the water element. Things like squirting are also associated with the water element, I think it's quite self explanatory why, that's a lot of watery, bodily fluids being expelled. In general stimulation of the G-spot or stimulation of the prostate are both things that tend to activate the water element as well. And lastly, water sports. So, these are different kinds of kinks and fetishes that usually involve a lot of liquids. If you're interested in that you can research that, that is a whole category in and of itself, but again, that will also usually use a lot of fluids and bodily fluids and liquids which will also activate the water element. - [Narrator 1] When it comes to the sexual positions that help us to come into resonance and express the water element, just like this type of sexuality is a bit more common or a bit more mainstream. We also find positions which are a bit more familiar and comfortable. The first position that we see is the missionary position. And this is because that in the missionary position, we can feel relatively comfortable. We can have a sense of romantic atmosphere as we look into our partner's eyes. If we are using oil or even if we are just sweating, we can slide over our partner's body and we can feel how we're both flowing together like two rivers into the sea. - [Narrator 2] Another position which activates the water element is 69. And that's because when we're both giving and receiving oral sex, we both have our sense of taste which is wildly activated, and there's also a lot of watery quality to our mouth and we're receiving a lot of lubrication through our genitals. So that's a classic position that will activate the watery element. Another great position is cowgirl where one partner is sitting on top. And the reason that this position can be great is because it allows for a lot of central hip movements for the partner on top. So it allows for a lot of circular undulating movements in the hips which are more sensual in nature and which activate the element of water. And lastly, the scissor position. This is a bit more acrobatic where both of your heads are on opposite sides of the bed and your legs are coming towards each other and are crisscrossing in a scissor like position. These can be done, actually this is a very fun position for same sex female partners because there can be a lot of fun stimulation of your genitals in this way. Or also with penetration it's a great position because again, it allows for a lot of sensuality, you can both kind of be sliding and flowing into each other with undulating movements. - [Narrator 1] And now just take a moment and scan your body, try to get in touch with your emotions, with your sensations, and see if all this talk about this watery fluid sexuality is something that turns you on, is something that arouses you. If you like this sense of romanticism, or maybe this is not necessarily something that really rocks your boat, either way we really encourage you to take a moment, try to come into resonance with this element, try to with this hints that we gave you to find ways to express it, and play it rather with yourself or with your partner. After that when you feel ready and embodying this water qualities within you, we'll move to the next element. - [Man] Our next element is fire. Fire is an element, which is related with everything, which is obviously hot, but also with movement and dynamism. The main elements, which are related with the lovemaking or with the sexuality expressed with the fire element is that the fiery lovemaking is very passionate. There is a lot of subtle tension between the lovers. It's almost kind of like a Latin dance if you wish. There is subtle place of power, like domination and submission, and you can take it to different extent. It could be very expressive or very subtle. There is a sense of intensity throughout the interaction, and it's about pushing things to the edge. And generally, obviously, as the water is soft and cooling, the fire is hot and blazing. - [Woman] Now the touch on the fiery element, if you remember, the earth element was very grounding and heavy. The water element was very oily and sensual. And of course, the fiery element is very, very passionate. So just like this image here. A type of fiery touch would be scratching or any type of touch, which is very heating. So usually, that's any touch where there's a lot of friction where we really heat our partner's body through our hands. Generally, also the pace of the fiery touch is little bit more quick. So there's a lot of passion and friction and heat, and it's all a bit more rapid and building more intensity. Now, on the other hand, the touch actually could also be slow. But when the touch is slow in a fiery way, it's not slow and steady in the same way as the earth element, but it's slow in a very deep and intense way. Now, some things that can activate the element of fire in our sexuality are, as Solar has mentioned, power play and BDSM. Again, this can be done in any type of intensity. So for some people, this will take on very more extreme power play where one person is completely submissive, and the other person is completely dominating, but this could also be more subtle where it's just this little glimpse in your partner's eye, the way you look at your partner that is directing their movement or what you want them to do. That's a more subtle way of activating the fire element within you. Then a little bit more practical, for example, biting. Biting, scratching, slapping, hair pulling. And you might notice that these are quite similar to some of the things that can activate the earth element. So here, the difference is really your inner energy and attitude because we can bite, scratch, slap and pull hair from a very raw and animalistic way, but we can also do it from a more refined place of subtle power. So here, we don't need to be too extravagant with the biting and scratching. It can be more subtle because the power comes from our inner fire. - [Man] Another way to see the different in those expression between the earthy expression to the fiery expression is that here, the biting, the slapping, the grabbing is been done with much more precision with a higher level of refinement and control. So that could be a good way to feel the different between them, that while we activated the earthy element, the general movement, like we said, it's much more primal, animalistic, the touch is may be a little bit more taking as you're just going for something. And here with the fiery element, we are directing our partner or being directed by them. When it comes to the sexual positions that you take in order to help to activate this fiery energy within you, you can take any body position that will allow you to go into a more passionate interaction, maybe pushing your partner against the wall or bending them over the table, or vice versa. And generally speaking here, we're trying to find positions which will allow for deep penetration. So if in the more earthy type of lovemaking, we have our bodies slamming into each other like big animals having sex. You can literally hear the pounding of the bodies. And with the water element, we are gently sliding with each other. Here with the fiery element, we are really enjoying this deep, deep penetration. Whether we are penetrating or being penetrated, we're constantly looking for greater and greater depth. - [Woman] So as buddy said, there is against the wall or over a table or over a chair. This is what we see sometimes in movies, like this very passionate moment when you see your partner and right away, you wanna ravish them and take their clothes off and push them against the wall. This is a very passionate, fiery type of lovemaking, - [Man] Or as well, the typical power play fantasy, having sex with your boss in the office, in a place that it's also forbidden to do that. - [Woman] Another position is cowgirl. Now, cowgirl, if you remember, that was one of the positions also that could activate the water element. If the person on top is doing more sensual movements like hip circles or undulations or figure eights. Now, cowgirl, to activate the fiery element is a little bit different. It could either be the person on top riding their partner could be the one playing with more control. So really, taking control of how fast or how slow they're moving and kind of guiding their partner. Or the other way around would be that the person on the bottom could hold the hips of the partner riding them, and with their hands, pull them closer to them and make the penetration go deeper or less deep or faster or slower. So either way with this position, one of the two partners is more so dominating and one is more submissive, and this is what can activate a more fiery quality to this specific position. And lastly, again, we have doggy style here, which can activate the earth element if we do it in this hunter and prey style. But if we do it in this more directed, fiery way like what Solar described earlier, it can also activate the fiery element because, again, this is a really great position to play more with subtle power play. - [Man] So by now, listening to that, I'm guessing that you already have a little bit of a flavor and you see if all these passionate talk about having sex in the office, being pushed against the wall, scratching, biting, role play, domination and submission turns you on, really flames your fire, or actually, maybe puts you down a little bit. Either way, try to come into resonance with this element. Try to invoke it within you. Go play and experiment, and when you're ready, we'll move to the next element. - [Man] The last element that we're gonna be working with in our journey is the air element. The air element is related with everything which is light, subtle and refined. The main qualities which are related with the air element when it comes to our sexual expression is that the sexual expression turns to become much more light, much more soft and gentle. There is a loving atmosphere, a sense of sweet connection and you can really feel that sweetness over pouring from your heart. - [Woman] And now the touch. Whereas, in the previous elements, it was a bit more physical, right? And the earth element, it was more heavy and grounding. The water element was more oily and fluid. And then the fire element was a little bit more intense with more friction. The touch on the air element, however, is very, very soft and gentle. So just like the image you can see here, even using feathery touch, whether that's a feathery touch with your fingertips where you're barely touching your partner's body, just slightly caressing your fingertips across theirs, or actually using an object that evokes a quality of air, like a feather. Another fun way to play with this is actually to touch more energetically. So touching right above your partner's body. This is great for when we want to start to move the energy throughout the body. You can actually caress the air right on top of your partner's body to gently allow the energy to circulate. And another fun way to play is to mix between feathery touch while you also blow on your partner's skin. So either blowing hot air or cool air, again will also activate the sense of lightness. Now, what are some things that can activate this quality of air in your sexuality is gentle caressing. So caressing, especially of the face while you're gazing into your partner's eyes, like you can see in this picture. And that takes me to the next point, which is eye gazing. Eye gazing tends to elicit a very sweet quality in the heart, which is associated with the quality of air. Also blowing air on your partner, or even blowing air on your partner's genitals. This can be a very playful way to play with the air element in a more sexy way. And lastly, there is breathwork. So all the breathwork techniques you learn in this course are working to some degree or another with the air element. They're not only working with the element of air, 'cause they're also working with the sexual energy which is associated oftentimes also with earth, water and fire, especially if it's a more activating breath, but all of them use the quality of air as a vehicle. So using breathwork during your love making is also a great way to start to play with the element of air. - [Man] When it comes to the sexual positions that can help you invoke the presence and the qualities of the air element, we find that the general interaction tend to be much more slow and softer. There might be a little bit of a sweet playful energy to it, which you can see is very different, let's say, from the fiery passion and intense interaction. And there is a greater sense of contentment. It seems that time and space completely dissolve and you are just melting in presence with your partner. - [Woman] Now, some positions that just make it easier to access that inner state, first of all is missionary. There is a reason that it's one of the most classic positions and that, in one way or another, we can activate almost any element through that position, depending on our inner attitude. But when it comes to the air element, missionary is great because it allows us to be really close to our partner. In the missionary position there's a lot of skin to skin contact and there's also the opportunity to gaze into your partner's eyes as you are making love. You can also caress your partner's face. You can whisper sweet things in their ear. So it's a very, very intimate and beautiful position. And another great position for the air element is yab-yum, and that's the position you see illustrated here in this picture, so where one partner is sitting up and the other partner is sitting on top of them. This is a beautiful, beautiful position because it allows for a greater connection of the sex and the heart center. Again, you can also hug each other, like you see in this image, which is very sweet and very loving. Or you could also lean back a little bit and gaze into your partner's eyes as you're penetrating each other in this very intimate position. - [Man] And now, after hearing the qualities of expressing sexuality with the air element, you'll probably already notice if that's some things that opens you up, that turns you on sexually, or maybe not so much, but either or, try to find ways to invoke these elements, coming to resonance with it, and express it sexually right there with yourself or with your partner. And after you did that, and you did that to each one of the elements individually, then try to go and combine all of them, flowing from one element to another, shifting between them, finding the ones that you enjoy working with the most and expanding the range of your sexual expression. - In this module, we'll be sharing some of our all-time favorite sexual rituals with you. But I wanted to start off by talking a little bit about why rituals and why I believe that rituals are such a cornerstone practice if we want to tap into the depths of our sexual potential. Sometimes when we hear words like ritual, some people get a little bit like weirded out. Like, is it something strange? Is it like we think we're creating something out of nothing? Is it religious? Is it dogmatic? And I just wanna clear all of that up and say that rituals are just containers that we create that help us tap into the sacredness of the moment. So it's not to say that by doing a ritual, by doing certain steps, we are like creating magic out of thin air. We're creating sacredness where there was no sacredness before. But it's just creating a container that helps our mind become aware and present and attune to the divinity that is always right here. Now, ideally, we didn't even need to do any elaborate steps to tap into that. But most of us don't live with this constant awareness in our hearts of the sacredness of life. Sometimes we may have a certain experience. Maybe you did a cacao ceremony or you went to ecstatic dance or you had just an experience in your life that really opened you and in that moment you had such a deep state of inner knowing, but then in the next moment, you have a fight with your partner or you're thinking about what you need to make for dinner or you're stressed about paying the bills. And most of the time in those moments, we're completely tapped out and were not able to remember that sacredness. And with sexuality, the same thing applies. When we go into habitual ways of masturbating or making love, maybe you masturbate after a really stressful day at work just to let go of everything that happened. And as a stress release, and just to give you something to be able to go to sleep. Or maybe you have sex with your partner just because you think that that's what you're supposed to do as a good partner, you need to have sex. So therefore you're having sex, but maybe you're not being really intentional about it. And you're not really tuned into the sacredness of the act. So by doing rituals, it's helping your mind to really tap into the sacredness. And it's creating a container where it's more likely that you'll have a deep and meaningful experience. And specifically in sexual rituals, we start to tap into the whole sensuality of sex. So instead of just going straight for penetration or rubbing the genitals and trying to rush to the finish line, in rituals, we really take our time. There's many different steps. We awaken all of our senses and we really luxuriate in the experience. So not only does that help us tap in more and become more present, but it also opens up a deeper level of pleasure and orgasmic potential. So these rituals that we'll be sharing with you are here for you to really implement in your sex life. So pick a ritual that really resonates with you, either a solo ritual or a partnered ritual, and put it in your calendar, say on Friday night I'm gonna do this ritual and then press the video and dedicate some time to actually being intentional around your sexual energy and carving out devoted time for your rituals so it's not something that you do at the end of the day when you barely have any energy left. And it's just like the last thing that you need to get off of your to-do list, but actually carving out time and prioritizing it. Knowing that, okay, on Friday night from six to 7 p.m., we're doing this ritual together. And just by prioritizing your sex life, by prioritizing pleasure, by taking the time to go through all the different steps of the ritual, that alone is already gonna create such deep shifts and transformations in the way that you experience sex, pleasure, and orgasm. So enough talking about why rituals are so freaking amazing. In the next video, Solar is gonna talk a little bit about the ritual ingredients, so all the different steps that come together to create a ritual. And after that, you'll learn very specific both solo and partnered rituals that you can take into your sacred sexual practice. - When it comes to rituals there are several ingredients that you want to include in most if not all of the rituals that you do. The first thing that you wanna pay attention to is time. When you wanna do a ritual, it's really recommended to plan for it. So not to be super spontaneous and just do it on the go. You want to have a certain time that you set in order to do the ritual and that will allow you to align yourself and do all the things that you need in order to prepare for the ritual to be there. Now, as you do get a bit more experienced, you can be a little bit more spontaneous about it but the rule of thumb over here is that the more energy, the more time, the more preparation and effort that you put in preparing your ritual, the deeper and better the results of the ritual usually are. So, let's say that for the bare minimum for now you might decide that you wanna do a ritual tonight. But it's even stronger if you decide a week in advance or some people even plan months in advance for more big and complex rituals. And there's all kind of small things that you can do to go into that resonance, to remind yourself during the day that you're aligning everything in your being towards that ritual that you're going to do. So, on a practical note, you might decide that on Friday at 7:00 p.m. you want to do a ritual. So you already know how to plan the rest of your day towards that moment to get all the ingredients that you need for that specific ritual and also to be in the right mood, in the right physical energy. So you also don't get to the ritual completely exhausted, that you're not stressed, that there are certain things after the ritual that you immediately need to attend and that you can completely be present with whatever it is that you're doing. So, after you set the time for the ritual you also want to prepare the space and yourself, your body and mind to the event. Starting with, very straightforward, you want to clean the space. It is very important that you're not just coming into your room or to whatever space you're gonna do the ritual in and start doing things. You want to take the time to really clean energetically and physically the floor, the cupboard, if you have an altar, cleaning the altar, and if you're gonna do a ritual on your bed, definitely cleaning and changing the bedsheets. Refreshing the place, putting an effort into the cleaning and again, not doing it mindlessly, but really knowing that in every piece of dust that you remove, you are preparing the altar, you are preparing the temple for the ceremony that you're going to do in that space. All this energy that you're putting in the preparation, you will fill it later on when you're actually doing the ceremony. In the same way that you prepare the physical space where the ceremony is about to occur, you also want to take time to prepare your mind, your emotion, and your physical body. So very simply before doing a ceremony, take a time to take a shower. And when you wash yourself, do it consciously, do it with awareness. Think about how you are preparing your body as a vessel for the divine to come through. Even more than that, before the ceremony, before the shower, throughout the day, as much attention that you can bring to it with what kind of thoughts are you thinking about? What your emotional state is, and to align it towards the intention of the ceremony will help a lot. You also wanna pay attention to what you eat throughout the day before coming to the ceremony. You definitely don't wanna have a heavy meal just before ceremony, as that will take all the oxygen from your body to your digestive system and will make you more heavy and not so present. But you also, of course, don't wanna be starving. A lot of people do like to fast before a ceremony, maybe several hours, maybe the whole day, but this is more up to you. You will need to try and see how does it affect you. And also, it will make different effects according to the type of the ceremony that you wanna do. But generally, as a rule of thumb, you want to have a light meal several hours before the ceremony so when you come to it, you can be present, you're not hungry, but you're definitely not heavy or digesting throughout it. And another note regarding eating, also try to pay attention to what you're eating during the day. So if you're gonna eat things which are considered more as junk food, or just very heavy and greasy or meaty, you will probably also feel those things throughout the ceremony. If you will eat things which are more light and clean and make you have an elevated feeling in your body, those of course will also elevate your experience throughout the ceremony. Each little thing like this that you do throughout the day, every decision of what to eat, what not to eat, which conversation to engage with, which not, which emotions to dive into and which to put to the side, are small things that you are doing in order to prepare yourself through the ceremony. And you can think about those things. I'm having a ceremony today in the evening, do I want to engage in this or that thing? And each one of those decisions that you're taking throughout the day, whether to eat this thing or not, to engage in that conversation or not, take that activity or that activity, and really aligning yourself with the intention of the ritual that you are about to do in that day, will create an accumulation of energies, of more effort, of more clarity of intention that will become fruitful in your ritual. After you decided what time you're going to do the ritual and made sure that you don't have anything just before that and just after it so you can transition harmoniously. And after you prepared the space and also prepared yourself towards the ritual, there could be different things that you need in order to do the ritual. You might need a singing bowl, you might need some flowers, maybe chocolate. There's different things for different rituals. So it really depends which ritual are you doing. But generally speaking, there's a few things which are really supportive to have in whatever ritual you are about to do. For example, in order to help you to transform the energy and the vibe in the room, to make it more easier for you to tap into that feeling of sacredness, it's usually nice if you can dim the light in the room just a little bit and light some candles. As well, you wanna make sure that the room smells nice. So maybe lighting some incense, maybe using some essential oils. Again, that all depends on what ritual are you actually doing at that time, but also having some flowers in the room helps to bring much more of an elevated and sacred energy. Now, if you're into that, I would also highly recommend to have an altar in the room. The altar could be any kind of elevated surface which on top of it, you have some symbols, some things that helps you to remember and to connect to the divine. It could be pictures or images that reminds you or symbolize for you something sacred, could be a small statue, and also could be something as simple as a flower, as a rose, maybe a bowl of water. The place where you put maybe some crystals or the incense that you light, the candles. Anything like this that help to bring the energy together and helps you to feel more grounded and connected can really help you with whatever ritual you are about to do. After you did all the preparation for your ritual, when you want to begin the ritual it is nice to take a few moments and to create a little bit of an opening ceremony. You want to get clear about your intention, feel them, say them internally. And then if you can also saying it out loud. This will really help the performance or the effect of the ritual to go much deeper. So in that sense, when you are ready to begin, sit down and if you have an altar, it's really nice to do it in front of it, or in a different ceremony you might be sitting already on the bed or wherever you are. Close your eyes, make sure that your spine is straight, and just take a few breaths to settle down. Allow yourself to inhale through the nose and exhale through the mouth. Maybe with a little bit of a sigh. And really coming to be very present in this moment. Then with the next breath, bring your attention to the center of the chest and focus on your heart. Feel that tenderness, feel your intention. Ask the divine consciousness to come through you, to help you to navigate whatever you are about to do. Invoke the presence of the divine in the room and in the ceremony and offer first of all, the fruits, the benefits of whatever you are about to do to the divine consciousness and ask, truly ask, that it will only come to fruition if this will be in alignment with your highest purpose and for the benefit of all beings at all places. You will see that just doing this, this simple opening ceremony, aligning your intention, focusing on your heart, calling for the divine consciousness to come through you and into the space and offering the gifts, offering the fruits of the ritual that you're about to do to the divine consciousness could already be a transformative and a very, very deep experience. Now, although different spiritual traditions have very specific ways how to do this opening ceremony, which is also of course, related to their tradition, you really don't need to overthink it. There is an intuitive knowledge in your heart. So just sit down, focus in the center of the chest, try to connect, and work with whatever words, whatever images, whatever spontaneously comes up to you, in order to invoke the presence, in order to invoke the grace in whatever you are about to do. And you will see that if you are genuine and true, something miraculous will happen. Still in this moment of opening the space for the ritual, don't rush up, don't hurry. So after you did this first beginning ceremony allow yourself to stay seated for a little bit longer. Allow the energies to simmer into you and maybe take another few moments to meditate. Now, of course, this, you will need to adjust according to whatever ritual you are about to do, but really try to pace things that you are not rushing anywhere and you are staying connected with your heart. When you are ready, then start whatever ritual you are about to do today. Going through the different steps of this ritual, all the different nuances. And then when you're ready to conclude, after everything is set and done, it's also very important that you're not just, I don't know, standing up and going or transitioning into something else mindlessly. You want to take a moment to really conclude the ritual properly. So again, as a rule of thumb, it is really recommended to take another at least five minutes of meditation, to sit and to allow the energies to settle. You want to allow the effects of the ritual that you did to come into your resonance, into your energetic body, into your mind, into your emotions. So you're sitting there just for a few more moments connecting with your heart and reflecting on the experience that you just had. After you've sat and meditate in the end of the ritual for five minutes or an hour, that's really up to you, you also want to officially conclude the ritual. And a very simple, straightforward and easy way to do that is to say or to announce that the ritual is concluded. You can clap your hands, maybe three times to make a strong audible sound. And then declare that this ritual is concluded. You will probably see that immediately after doing this, the energy in the room shifts a little bit. Still if you feel inspired, I would recommend to stay very interiorized. So whether you are with yourself or with your partner, whatever the setting is, still taking things very slow and easy. And allowing the energies, the residues from the ritual that you just did to keep on lingering for as long as you can. - So this next ritual is one of my all time favorites, and it's called, Awakening of the Senses. And it's a beautiful ritual to offer to your partner as a way to help them activate all of their different senses. We're all constantly bombarded by different stimuli to our senses, which can actually desensitize us over time. So this is a beautiful practice to start to bring back sensitivity in all the different senses, which in turn, will allow your partner to receive much more pleasure. There's a few different ways to do this ritual. The first one is just stand alone, so just doing the steps that I'm about to share with you. Or another beautiful way to do it is as an introduction into a longer lovemaking ritual. It's really beautiful to start with this, because once your senses are fully activated, the lovemaking experience can go even deeper. Now, I personally really like to do this ritual as a surprise, that's something that I like to do. Because it's really beautiful if your partner doesn't know what's happening, and you just tell them that you have a special date night planned for them. And then they come into the room and you blindfold them, and all of the sudden, they're having all these sensory explosions. It's a really, really fun surprise. So if you can do it as a surprise, I recommend it. But of course, if you're watching this video right now with them, so maybe that's not so possible anymore. Now as the giver of the ritual, ideally you wanna both give and receive this ritual. You wanna pick separate days, so you can both be a giver one day and then be a receiver the other day. And as a giver, you wanna start by setting up the space before your partner comes in. So cleaning the room, creating a nice ambiance, and you also wanna take some time to prepare a sensory buffet. Now here is where you can get creative, because you can get really, really elaborate with a lot of different items to awaken the senses, or you can also keep it simple. But in a moment, I'll share what I have here to spark some of your inspiration. So the first item that you need is a blindfold. You can either buy a blindfold, or you can also just have a piece of fabric. And I recommend blindfolding your partner from the first moment that they walk into the room, before they could really see all the different items that you have prepared. Another important item to have is some tissues, because this will come in handy. Because there is nothing more uncomfortable than being in the middle of this sensory experience, and all of the sudden your hands are dripping with juices of fruits and you don't have anything to clean your hands with. So this is just gonna help keep things very, very clean. And then for the different sensory awakening items. For the sense of taste, ideally, you wanna try to think about some of the foods that your partner loves. Obviously, if any of the fruits here your partner hates, you don't wanna add that, because that's not gonna be a pleasant experience. So here I have some chocolate. Chocolate is always usually a good call. It's also an aphrodisiac, so it's really nice to include that in. In general, you wanna try to have chocolate which is more soft. Because if your partner is blindfolded, feeding them anything which they really need to chew on or which is hard, can take them a little bit out of the experience. So if the chocolate is hard, let it sit at room temperature for a little bit so it softens. Then I also have some dragon fruit here, I have some strawberries, I have fruit that I always forget the name of but it's a tropical Thai fruit, and then I also have some papaya here. The great thing about foods and fruits if they're aromatic, is that you can use them both for the sense of taste, but also for the sense of smell. So as you'll see in a moment when I'll demonstrate, you can also tease your partner with smell of a fruit before actually feeding it to them. Next, I have some roses here, which again, work on two different senses. One, the sense of smell, because these roses are very, very fragrant. And the second way is for the sense of touch, because they have a very, very interesting texture to them. Then moving on to touch, I have some interesting textures here. I have some rope that I caress along my partner's body. I also have a chain, which again, brings a very different sensation. And it also stays quite cold, so it also brings a cooling sensation as you run it across their body. And then here, I have a little nipple clamp on one side and leather fringe on the other side. So I could use both the nipple clamp to pinch the nipples for a lot of fiery sensations, or I could also to use this leathery fringe, because it also has a very interesting texture. And here you don't really need to go out and spend a lot of money on buying things to activate the sense of touch. Because most of us in our house, we have different items that have an interesting texture to them. So you can use a necklace, you can use a feather earring, and of course, you also have your own body. So you could use your touch, you could scratch, you could kiss, you could blow. So the sense of touch is probably one of the easiest ones to check off. And next we have the sense of smell. So I already spoke about the fruits actually have a smell to them. The rose also has a smell to them. But then I also have some fragrant oil, some essential oils, I have roses and lavender. And here I have an arousal oil, an organic arousal oil that has a lot of ginger in it. And this can be used both for the sense of smell, but it's also a heating oil. So it's also interesting for the sense of touch. Because if I were to put some of that on his body, it will also start to heat his skin which is also very interesting. And another item that I really love that I don't have here today, is to have a cup with an ice cube, and a cup with a little bit of hot water or hot tea. Because what you can do with that, is you can feed yourself. Suck on the ice cube a little bit and then kiss your partner. And then take a sip of the hot water and then kiss your partner, and that also elicits a very, very interesting sensation. So now, I'll demonstrate how you can play with these different items in a very sensual way. You don't wanna be too like robotic around it and just start with taste, and then move to smell, and then to sound. You wanna play around with the different ones. So you wanna really attune yourself to your partner and constantly tease them, and allow them to really go deep in the sensory experience. And one more sense that I didn't mention, is the sense of sound. So there's a few ways to play with that. One is to have really nice music playing in the background. And on top of that, you can also whisper erotic things in your partner's ear, which is also a very, very fun thing to play with. So once you have the room set up, and you've collected your own little sensory buffet and you're ready to invite your partner in, you wanna start off by blindfolding them. (bed sheets rustling) And the key in this ritual is to be really aware as the giver. So you wanna make everything very gentle and very mindful, asking them if, "You're comfortable?" - Yeah. - Okay. If not, allowing them to readjust. 'Cause if they're not comfortable, it's constantly gonna be on their mind, and they're not really gonna be able to go into the experience. And then you can just allow them to take a few deep breaths, and you can touch them a little bit just to anchor them in their body. You could whisper in their ear that they can just relax and receive. And a fun way to play with foods, is not to feed your partner right away, but to start just by allowing them to smell the food. Then you can run it across their lips without letting them eat it quite yet. So just allowing them to feel the texture of the fruit on their lips. And then you could bring it in and tease them, and take it away. Being really slow here. Also kiss them. (lips kissing) A fun way to play with taste is to take a little bite or suck on a fruit, and then kiss your partner, so they get the taste through your mouth. And with fruits, either you have a bigger fruit like this strawberry that they can easily bite on, or you wanna cut it very small so they don't need to chew too much. And the key is, especially when you feed them, you don't wanna feed them one thing after another, because you really wanna allow them to savor the taste. So after feeding them something, you could go to touch, and just allowing them to really receive the taste of what you just fed them. Now, when it comes to smell, something to be really, really aware of, is not to put essential oils or perfumes on your fingertips. Because then the next time that you take a fruit, it will have some of that flavor on the fruit. And there's nothing more unpleasant as a receiver than like receiving in fruit or chocolate, and then having an after taste of perfume. So what I like to do for the sense of smell, is take a little bit of the oil of my choice and put it on my forearm. Just put one drop and then rub my forearms together like so, and then just allow my partner to smell it. - [Solar] Hmm. - I could also blow, to bring the aroma closer to their nose. But the key here is you don't want to put the oil directly on their nose, because then the smell will constantly stay there. So by putting it on your body and then bringing it closer, and moving it away, you have more control over how much or how little you want to activate this sense. - [Solar] Hmm. - Then for the sense of touch, there's many different ways to play with this. You can start off by being really, really gentle. And you constantly wanna be attuned to your partner, so noticing what they like. If they relax more, if they open in a sensation or if they contract, that's something good to be aware of so you can really attune yourself to make sure that it's a pleasant experience for them. And you can also play between different sensations. So let's say on... (chain rattling) On one side, I could have a sensation of the rope and I could follow it by scratching. And whispering something. Bite. And the hands are extremely sensitive, so it's always nice to run different sensation across the hands and the fingertips, because that's usually where we feel the most sensation. Another fun way to work with the sense of taste, is to grab whatever you want to feed them in your mouth, and to feed it through a kiss. (lips kissing) Another fun sensation to play with, is blowing hot or cold air. So a general rule of thumb, is if you blow with your mouth open like this, (Aida exhaling slowly) this sensation will feel hot. Whereas if you blow with your lips together, it will feel more cool, like this. So you can play between those two different types of breath. And of course you can also feel free to add in oil, so you can get more and more sensual. And I always like to start really mild and then intensify it. So for the sake of the camera, I'm not gonna show everything that I usually would do. But you could also invite your partner to lay down and you can really give them a full body massage, play with more fruits, and you can also start to activate their genitals in a very sensual way. So you don't need to keep it PG. You can make it more and more erotic, and that's how it can also be a beautiful ritual that leads into lovemaking. So as I said, this oil is really nice because it has a heating quality. So not only does it feel really nice and sensual when I apply it, but it will also start to heat his chest and make it tingle as it starts to settle in. And then I could play with that heating sensation and add a cooling sensation. And you can also play around with coming from different angles. So you could sit behind your partner. Make them feel really held. You can rock their bodies, allowing them to really let go and surrender. (Aida exhaling slowly) And you can even play with the foods, running it along their body. (Aida exhaling slowly) Smell. (Solar exhales) So this was a short little demonstration, just to show you how you could play with these different items. I could keep on going for a very long time, 'cause there's many different variations to do here. But I just wanted to mention the important points of not mixing oils on the hand with food on the hand, and also the different ways to tease. So you don't just wanna like stuff your partner's face, that's not the intention behind it. Ideally they already ate, so this is just like the little cherry on top of the pie. And you really want to allow them to savor the experience. So always think, "How can I activate their senses more? How can I make this more of a full experience for them?" And ideally you'd do this for at least 15 to 20 minutes, and you could even make it go longer if you want. And yeah, I hope you enjoy this ritual. Set up everything beforehand. Really think about all the items, be very intentional about it. The more intentional you are and the nicer your buffet is, the nicer the experience is going to be. And yeah, I hope you have fun trying. And I will unblind Solar now, and I think we are gonna continue off camera. (chuckles) - [Instructor] So to begin this ritual, you wanna start by setting up this space and taking a shower. If you want, you can pause this video right now and then once you're all set up and ready to go, you can press play again. So once you're ready to start the ritual, I'll invite you to sit in front of your partner on the bed and close your eyes. We'll start with a short opening meditation just to ground and to fully arrive in the present moment. So taking a deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth, relaxing fully releasing any tension, anything that may have happened up until this point. And keep on breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth. Feeling that each exhale is anchoring you deeper and deeper into this present moment. Allowing your mind to become still, your body to become relaxed. And now gently flutter your eyes open to meet the gaze of your partner in front of you. Gaze into your partner's eyes, focusing on seeing through the eyes of the heart, seeing the essence of this beautiful human being in front of you. Looking beyond just a physical flesh and piercing through to allow your heart to meet, your souls to meet through your gaze. Keep breathing fully as you gaze into your partner's eyes. Make sure you're not holding any tension in your jaw. Really taking in the fullness of this beautiful being in front of you. And now we'll transition into the conscious undressing part of the ritual. So the person was receiving the worship will very mindfully start by taking off every single layer of their clothing. And as you do so, with each layer of clothing that you remove, out loud you'll state something that you would like to let go of during this ritual. So not rushing through this process, but really taking your time to be very intentional as you remove each layer of clothing and state out loud what you would like to release and let go of. The person offering the worship just looking at your partner as they're undressing and being really present with their process. Now, partner receiving the worship repositioning yourself in a way that feels comfortable perhaps lying down or in a reclining position is making sure that your pussy is visible to your partner. Partner giving the worship reposition yourself so you can fully see your partners pussy, and bringing your gaze down at their genitals and gazing at their pussy with love, with devotion, with worship, with admiration, respect. Taking in the beauty of this pussy in front of you, uniquely perfect, like a beautiful flower. It's its unique shape and fragrance and essence. Really taking a moment to appreciate all the pleasure the bliss, the ecstasy that this part of your body is able to give you and your partner. And now if you want, you can also offer flower pedals to her pussy, or doing any other movement whether it's a bowel or any symbolic gesture to express your devotion, your gratitude, your admiration. And now if you want, you can continue your devotional pussy worship with oral sex or by fingering your partner, doing so in a very devotional worshiping way allowing your partner to fully receive pleasure and really giving from your heart. - [Narrator] So to begin this ritual, you wanna start by setting up this space and taking a shower. If you want, you can pause this video right now. And then once you're all set up and ready to go, you can press play again. So once you're ready to start the ritual, I'll invite you to sit in front of your partner on the bed and close your eyes. We'll start with a short opening meditation just to ground and to fully arrive in the present moment. So, taking a deep breath in through the nose and out through the mouth. Relaxing fully. Releasing any tension, anything that may have happened up until this point. And keep on breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth. Feeling that each exhale is anchoring you deeper and deeper into this present moment. Allowing your mind to become still, your body to become relaxed. And now, gently flutter your eyes open to meet the gaze of your partner in front of you. Gaze into your partner's eyes. Focusing on seeing through the eyes of the heart. Seeing the essence of this beautiful human being in front of you. Looking beyond just a physical flesh and piercing through to allow your hearts to meet, your souls to meet through your gaze. Keep breathing fully as you gaze into your partner's eyes. Make sure you're not holding any tension in your jaw. Really taking in the fullness of this beautiful being in front of you. Now, we'll transition into the conscious undressing part of the ritual. So, the person receiving the worship will very mindfully start by taking off every single layer of their clothing. And as you do so with each layer of clothing that you remove, out loud, you'll state something that you would like to let go of during this ritual. So, not rushing through this process but really taking your time to be very intentional as you remove each layer of clothing and state out loud what you would like to release and let go of. The person offering the worship, just looking at your partner as they're undressing and being present with their process. And now, partner receiving the worship, taking a few moments to find a comfortable position. It could be lying down or sitting back in a reclined position. And just making sure that the position allows for your cock to be visible. Then partner offering the worship, you can reposition yourself to sit in front of your partner's cock. And slowly bring your gaze down onto their genitals. And start a practice of cock gazing. So, gazing at your partner's cock with love, with devotion, with worship. Gazing at it as a sacred temple that it is. This beautiful part of your partner's body that can give them and you so much pleasure, so much depth. Really pouring your love, your devotion, your heart, into your partner's genitals. Gazing through the eyes of the heart. Now, if you want, you can also offer some symbolic offerings to represent your inner love, and devotion, and admiration. You could offer some flower petals. You could bow down. Whatever feels authentic to you in this moment. And now, if you want, I invite you to continue your cock worship with a devotional blow job or hand job. So, being very intuitive with the way you pleasure your partner but allowing them to fully receive without needing to do anything and really focusing on giving from your heart. So, I'll now leave you to it. You can keep on worshiping with a sacred blow job or hand job. Fully giving, allowing your partner to receive this gift of utter and complete presence, and love, and devotion. - So for the lovemaking ritual, you wanna start with all the different opening steps of a ritual. So to start off, you wanna make sure to clean your bedroom or wherever you'll be doing the ritual and add in some elements to bring a sense of sacredness. So light some candles, maybe buy some flowers, have some incense burning or some essential oils so when you enter the room, you're really kind of transported into this sacred temple atmosphere. It's also very helpful for this ritual if you and your partner don't see each other for a few hours before coming together. So it's not recommended to spend the whole day together and then at the end of the day, do the ritual together, but it's more beneficial to kind of spend the day apart and then come together just to do the ritual. This is because it's gonna create polarity. It's gonna create that magnetic pull between the two of you where you both really came back into your own center, and from that full place, there's gonna be more attraction, more energy for the lovemaking to go really deep. So once you're ready to start the ritual and both you and your partner are feeling clean and relaxed and centered, you can come into the space and start with a short grounding meditation. So sitting in front of one another and just closing your eyes and taking a few deep breaths really allowing the breath to fill your belly and really taking a moment to anchor yourself into this present moment. Perhaps one of you came from work or perhaps you were just doing something with the kids, so you just wanna create that moment of transition to let go of anything that may have happened and fully arrive in the present moment. Next, you wanna open your eyes and start a short eye gazing practice with your partner, so invoking all of these elements that Soler talked about in the "Eyes of the Heart" video, so really looking beyond the physical flesh and seeing their hearts, their soul, their essence and taking a moment to connect on that level. This is really powerful to start your lovemaking ritual with this because it kind of shifts the way we relate to the other person. It's not anymore two personalities with a history and perhaps with an argument that we had this morning and with all the different stories that we've been through together, meeting each other, but it's two souls meeting each other. It's really being able to pierce through and connect on the level of the heart. The next part of the ritual is to do a short breathwork practice together to activate sexual energy. So for this, I suggest using the breathwork technique that you learned in the breathwork module for building sexual energy, and it's really nice if you do this sitting in front of each other and looking into each other's eyes, if you want, as you do it because it can intensify the sexual energy to you see your partner really get into it and activate their sexual energy. After doing this for a few moments, you can slowly transition into foreplay. Here, there's no set rules, but I invite you to call upon what you learned in the previous module with the different expressions, according to the elements, so really playing around with different expressions and allowing yourself to be really intuitive and free as you start to amplify the sexual energy. The key here is not to rush to penetrative sex if you are planning to have penetrative sex, but to really give your body time to fully warm up, and this is also what's gonna help the energy spread because when we just focus right away on the genitals and right away we go for penetration, we didn't give the body time yet to become fully activated. So spend time to massage each other, to kiss each other, to scratch each other, to do oral sex, fingering, handjob, whatever you know really works for your partner, and really luxuriate in this foreplay. Don't rush anywhere. Don't feel like you need to get somewhere, but just be super present to each and every moment, to each and every sensation without rushing to the end line. Then if you want, you can move on penetrative lovemaking, if that's something you're in the mood for, and a key element to tune into here is to focus on circulating the sexual energy as you're having penetrative lovemaking, so not just focusing on the genitals but internally you can do the different breathing techniques to move the energy up. You could do the energy circuit with your partner as you're making love or you could individually move the energy. This is great if your partner thinks this is all a bit woowoo and a bit strange, but you are really into sacred sexuality. You could be doing the expanding breath or the orbit breath by yourself, and just by you moving the energy in your own body, naturally you will help your partner tap into that as well. So again, here, there's no hard rule on how you should be making love and like, how many minutes in each position. Again, you wanna allow yourself to play with the different expressions of the different elements, and whenever you notice the energy get really intense and really localized, you wanna take some time to move the energy up through breath, through touch, or through movement, and you can do this to yourself or you can also do it to each other, so helping each other move the energy by touching your partner's back or by reminding them to breathe upwards or by gazing into each other's eyes. That can be a really powerful way also to lift the energy up higher and really co-creating this expansive sexual experience together. So you can move the energy up your partner's back by touching their back, you could touch their forehead or the crown of their head or their hearts. You can breathe together. You can visualize the energy moving up both of your bodies, and you also wanna make sure that you're moving a lot so you're not just staying stiff but that you're really moving and breathing together, and if it's comfortable and available to you, I invite you also at some point in the love making to sit in a Yab Yum position, and while you're penetrating one another, if you choose to do so, doing the energy circuit breath to really synchronize your energies with your partner. This is a really nice thing to do when you're already in a medium to high state of arousal, so when there's already a lot of energy in your bodies, then moving to Yab Yum and doing this energy circuit breath connecting your sex and your heart is a really powerful way to go into full body orgasms together, and then when you're ready to conclude the ritual, just coming back to stillness, and you could sit in a Yab Yum position, or you can sit in front of each other or you could even cuddle and just taking a few moments in silence and just noticing how you're feeling in your body, feeling the expansiveness, feeling your heart opening, your consciousness expanding, and taking a few moments here to really integrate, so not rushing from the love making to the next part of your day, but really taking a few moments in silence here, and then when you're ready to conclude, you can do whatever gesture you want. You can blow out a candle or you can clap three times to signify the end of the ritual, and with that, you'll conclude the lovemaking ritual.