About This Course
What You Will Learn
- Tous les différents types d’orgasmes de la vulve
- Câlins sensuels pour taquiner et stimuler
- Techniques de massage érotique pour tout le corps
- Conseils pour la guérison et l'activation sexuelle
Take This Course and Hundreds More
Taught by the world’s top experts.
Quick results & easy-to-follow instructions.
For everyone. Singles, couples, all genders and orientations.
Your Instructor
Eyal Matsliah
Coach en Épanouissement Sexuel
Eyal Matsliah, Coach en Épanouissement Sexuel, t'accompagne pour canaliser ton énergie sexuelle afin de favoriser ton développement personnel. Ses enseignements pratiques du Tantra remettent en question les normes dépassées, offrant une nouvelle perspective sur le sexe et la sexualité.
More by This InstructorLessons and Classes
- 1. Bienvenue
- 2. Comment utiliser ce programme
- 3. Pour les femmes qui regardent ce programme
- 4. Qu'est-ce que l'orgasme féminin ?
- 5. Comment l'aider à imploser plutôt qu'exploser
- 6. Le continuum du plaisir
- 7. Orgasmes physiques
- 8. D'autres types d'orgasmes
- 9. Comment savoir ce qu'elle veut
- 10. Le jeu des trois minutes
- 11. Câlin sensuel
- 12. Faire des allusions et taquiner
- 13. Transfiguration
- 14. S'asseoir en Yub Yum
- 15. 5 Éléments - Introduction
- 16. Toucher de l'Air
- 17. Toucher d'Eau
- 18. Toucher de la Terre
- 19. Toucher de Feu
- 20. Toucher d'Éther
- 21. Tenir l'espace pour l'intégration
- 22. Conclusion
- 23. Massage des seins
- 24. Massage du corps entiers
- 25. Suggérer dans le massage corporel orgasmique
- 26. Massage Yoni Externe
- 27. Massage Yoni Interne
- 28. Guérison sexuelle et activation
Why Join Beducated?
Master New Techniques
Develop skills to become a better giver and an active receiver.
Reignite the Spark
Explore new ways to spice things up — with or without a partner.
Enjoy Sex More
Build confidence and give in to new depths of pleasure.
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Beducated is an online platform that offers 100+ courses on sex and relationships, led by the world’s top experts.
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Learn Great Sex with 5 Mins Per Day.
Surprise them with an erotic massage, spoil them with fresh oral techniques, or try out a new kink.
Try Beducated for 1 day for free and start learning how today.
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Transcripts
Welcome to Awakening Female Pleasure. My name is Eyal, and I'm so happy to share this program with you. This has literally changed my life and changed the life of the people that I've worked with. And finally, I'm able to present it, to share it in this form where you can reach it, where you can watch it from all over the world. Eyal: How to use this program. This is a short video about what you need to know, what you need to do, what you need to prepare in order to make the best use of Awakening Female Pleasure. A few things to say about me. Let's start with a little bit of me, me, me. And I'm only sharing this with you so you get some background if you haven't seen my story, or heard about my story already just so you know, a little bit who I am. So I've been exploring this for nearly 20 years and it really started with conscious sexuality and very amazing lovemaking from about the year 2000. And in some ways, even I'm looking back to my teenage years back in the eighties, I already started to have some very special experiences that kind of like set me apart from other teenagers and then put me on the path of becoming a lover and becoming a sexual healer. So yes, I've been doing it for quite a while. I've been professional, which means I've charged money since 2009 worked with many, many, many people. And really what is interesting is also that I like to say, I did a lot of research, which means I didn't just study this at some university, I actually made love with women. It wasn't just a numbers game. It wasn't just to put more notches in my black book or whatever, it was about really connecting and understanding women and pleasuring women. And, and yeah, it was a very beautiful path. And I've learned a lot. I learned so much from women, what they shared with me and I did a lot of mistakes. And even to this day, you know, I still experience and experiment with the things that they share with you in this program. And I'm not perfect, and I'm constantly learning. I've probably done 10,000 hours, if you know about the concept of 10,000 hours. Over 10,000 hours of study and practice of the things related to this program. So it comes quite natural for me now. And yes, there's been a lot of mistakes, so that's the best way to learn. And, you know, you can say it's not mistakes, it's just learning opportunities. I also published the book "Orgasm Unleashed" which is a female organism book that was endorsed by female sexuality leaders around the world. One of them called the book the best female orgasm book out there, women refer to it as their orgasm Bible. Yes, so again, I'm only saying this, so you understand I do know what I'm talking about. Also for the women watching this, either you're the woman. who's the partner of the guy who bought the program or you got it for yourself, yeah, you know, it's like, I'm a guy and I'm talking about female sexuality and it comes from literally a lifelong experiences. And yeah, more importantly, more importantly than what I've done is that I've taught this stuff to absolute beginners. So I'm holding workshops, in the workshops I see guys and women that don't have any experience with this stuff. And I teach them this in a very simple way, in a very straightforward way, no woo, woo no spiritual bullshit, very practical, very applicable. And they are able to work with, let's say women who are absolute beginners. And get them to orgasmic experiences, hold space for them, make them feel safe and comfortable and seen. And even if they work with a woman who's more orgasmic, she can share what you received from this guy or from this woman was new, was different, was very good. So yeah, this is something... If I'm proud at something, proud about something is not just what I've done myself but how I was able and I'm able to empower other people. And you're welcome to look at the client testimonial page on the website. There's literally, you know, dozens, dozens, maybe already hundreds of testimonials for the book for the coaching sessions, for the workshops and so on. So a few general things to know. The first thing to ask is, to look back again at why you got this program, what issues, what challenges you have that you wanna work on. It might be a good idea to pause this video for a moment and just write down. And the reason for this is really that it's not just you know, some nice to have program that teaches you something about biology or zoology or marketing on the internet or whatever. You know, what this is? This is important stuff. This is some of the core issues and core problems that we have in our life, boils down to sexuality and relationships. So write down, why did you get this program? What issues and challenges you are facing. So pause if you need. So welcome back. And the next thing that I invite you to do is to write your intention for the program. Okay, so it's not to deal with the issues but it's, what are you hoping to gain? What are you hoping to get from this program? Which kind of person do you wanna be? What's the intention with this program? Which kind of person do you wanna be? Which kind of lover do you wanna be? What do you want to do or share or experience with your partner? And again, also for the for the women watching this, what's your intention with watching this program? So just pause this for a moment and write it down. The next is what is your commitment, which is a little bit different than intention. So commitment is, if this is important for you, if you have some issues and challenges that you're working with, if you have an intention, which is what's you're dreaming about, what you're hoping for, there needs to be some level of commitment, which means you need to spend the time needed to watch the program. I recommend to watch all the program, maybe not the bonus section about the correlation control, it's not there. You don't have to watch that but the main program, I really recommend watching that. And maybe you need to set aside half an hour a day or an hour a day or a few hours during the weekend. Okay, so really make sure that you watch it. And more importantly, that you don't just watch it, but you actually practice this with your partner. If you don't have a partner, that's okay. You can just watch it by yourself but it's very important that you start practicing. And in the beginning, it might feel a bit awkward but the practice is what really gets you to embody this and to really learn on a deeper level. What about expectations? So in the years that I've been working with people, I see that people have a lot of expectations expectations of themselves, expectations of their partner. And also somebody would... A woman would come and she expects her partner to get it, while men would come to a couple of sessions and he expects himself to get it and expects his his woman to react like the women in the videos. It's really important to take it easy to understand this is a process. I'm sure that you would already get something after the first time that you watched the program but some things might take weeks. Some things might take months to experience, to be able to facilitate for another person. So yeah, really, really have patience and have compassion with yourself. Don't expect too much and really cultivate an attitude of discovery, of contentment and just see what happens. And having said that there is a lot to look forward to, okay, so this program, these principles, these techniques have worked for me, have worked for people. So yes, you can look forward to becoming a better lover, to connecting deeper with your partner, to experience orgasmic states together and energetic states together and deep, beautiful emotional states. And maybe even spiritual states to be able to, you know, give a beautiful massage, to make a woman feel safe, to be able to communicate better. And although this program is not directly about sex, also it will improve your sex life and also might improve your relationship, okay? So yeah, like I say, don't have expectations but be open and really look forward for all of the beautiful things that might unfold. It's really really recommended, and you will hear me say this a few times to join our online community. So we have a Facebook group. You can find the link lower in the section the link is called "Join Our Online Community Group." And this is a Facebook group where you can connect with other people who are doing the program. You can share your insight. It's really important to share your insights from the lectures, from the videos. And then by sharing them, you basically understand better what you got from the video. You see what other people got from the video. And also some people would share their challenges, you know, so maybe something, they didn't get it, they didn't understand, it's not working for them and I would support them in their program. And you would have a chance to see those answers. I provide free support on the group. Okay, so this is really beautiful resource. And also you would see people's success stories. You know, the first time that maybe you shared, the first time that you were able to give a whole body massage to your partner, and maybe your partner had her first orgasm or her first orgasmic state or orgasmic state that she didn't have before. Okay, maybe you already explored some of these in sex and it's improved your sex life. So really join the online community group. And this is really can make a difference in your experience of the program. Again, you don't have to, it's just a recommendation How to use this program. I recommend to watch the program in the order that I created it. And I created it with intention to start from more general things and the general things and the basic things actually very important. Sometimes people skip over the basics. They feel like, oh, I've been making love for 20 years, I don't need the basics, but the basics are actually advanced, the basics are profound. In one the first sections, which is the sensual hug, I actually share some of the most important principles that we are to work with throughout the program. So I really recommend you to watch each video. It's true that some of the videos are a bit long, so see how you can watch it or put it maybe in the background when you're doing something, maybe even watch it a few times. We recommend to do this because if you just jump to the end of the program, like I used to do with some programs that I bought in the past, it doesn't work because you miss some of the basics. Don't try to remember everything. And don't put this expectation on yourself, don't put this expectation on your partner. And I keep saying this throughout the program, you don't have to be perfect. It's about having the attitude, it's about having the principles and you don't have to memorize, elaborate routines or pressure points or whatever, okay? And it's totally okay also to take notes while you are watching a video. Recommended to take notes while you're watching, to refer to those notes while you having a sexual experience or a touch experience with your partner and yeah, don't try to remember everything. It's important that you start practicing with your partner. I said this already, so you can start practicing while you are watching this program. You can start practicing after you first watched the program both are good. But really this program is not a theory program. There's so many practices. There's so many beautiful thing for you to explore. Many of them are very, very simple, very basic. Some of them, maybe would be surprising for you and how basic they are. Some of them might feel maybe a little bit weird or strange in the beginning, but really trust me and trust my teachers and trust all of the people who's experiences resulted in this program and just give it a try. You can watch some of the videos together with your partner. It's a really beautiful experience as well. Some people watch porn together, I think it's much better to watch instructional sexual education like this program together. You can watch it together without doing anything. And you can also watch it together while you're practicing some of the practices and techniques from this program. And I really, again, recommend to watch it again, so after you watch it fully, after a few weeks, after a few months, watch it again. Like literally you would see that there's some things you didn't... It's like you didn't see them the first time. You didn't understand them, You didn't notice them, sorry not understand. You didn't notice them the first time that you watched a program. Okay, so sometimes you would watch it for the third time and the fourth time, and you would still find new information, new insights, new principles, new not exactly details, but let's say a more refined way, more subtle levels of the program, you would find in the second or the third viewing. What about what you need? You don't need much in order to go through this program. I recommend to journal. So you can use a physical journal, like papers, old school, right on your smartphone or write on your computer. It's really important that you write your experience that you're having, the insights that you got, what worked, what didn't work, ask your partner for feedback and yeah. Keep journaling and again, I promise you that if you look back at it after a few days, after a few weeks, after a few months, you would, first of all, see how much you progressed. In the beginning, maybe something didn't work. And after a few weeks you just became natural in that. Okay, so it's important to share in your journal. You can prepare a semi-hard mattress or just use your regular bed. It's good if the bed is not too soft, okay? This is why it's good to have a semi-hard mattress. Otherwise if you can put folded blankets on the ground, or over your carpet as well, that that works very well. And as I keep saying, don't worry about these details. It works. I've done sessions and obviously made love in a variety of situations, so it's all good. I recommend comfy clothes. Sometimes you would want to be naked. Sometimes you would want to have really comfy clothes. Don't do this in jeans. In regards to oil, we have a few massage practices that you would need oil for so I recommend always cold pressed on oils oils that preferably are okay even to eat. So they are edible oils, not refined oils. It can be something that has a nice smell and if possible, have a nice taste as well. So a few options are coconut oil, avocado oil, rapeseed oil. Coconut gets quite thick if it's not hot I'm recording this from Thailand. You can hear the tropical birds in the background. So in warm climates, coconut oil becomes a liquid but what you can do if you're in a cold climate is just put it... Don't put it in the microwave or anything. But if you put it in a double cup, so you put a little bit of hot water underneath it, underneath the cup, underneath the container where you have the oil this would heat up the oil and then you can use the coconut oil as well. Medical disclaimer, okay? This is something that we need to go over over quickly. So the program is not a substitute for medical or psychological or professional treatment. If there are any such a big issues, please seek the appropriate professionals. It's important to know that you are responsible for yourself, whatever advice and whatever technique and whatever it is that I'm sharing with you, ultimately, you are responsible. You and your partner are responsible for making the decision if you want to try something or not. If something comes up, if something serious, if there's pain, if there's alarm, if there's, I don't know, anything like that, seek professional help. Optional, you can also ask in the group, okay? Again, in the Facebook group, that's another thing, another resource that you can have. And, having said that there's no crazy things in the program. Okay so I don't assume that anything major would come up. So yeah, having said that you can enjoy the program, experiment, play, really have this attitude of play, attitude of exploration, okay? And see what comes up. And I would also say that without promising any healing transformations, I can say that I have seen healing transformations in my work as a professional. (birds chirping) Heres another one of those tropical birds. So I've seen that beautiful transformation, beautiful healing in my work and I also heard it from people. Okay, I also heard it from women who have read my articles online and then practice it by themselves. Okay, so this is possible. So next, introduce yourself in the Facebook group. Again, you can find the link in the next lecture the link to the Facebook group, and yeah, this is our online community. So once again, welcome to Awakening Female Pleasure. I can't wait to introduce the next videos to you and to hear how this is all working for you. So, see you in the next video. For the women watching this program. Welcome sisters, I'm happy to have you here. And this is a program for men, and there's also some women that might be watching this program. So you might be the partner of the men who bought this and it's really good for you, for your relationship, for your sex life that you're watching this now. You might be a woman who bought this for your current partner or for your future partner and in this case, you will be maybe doing a little bit more of the learning, and then you would share some of this with your partner. We'll go to this later. And you might be making love with women. And indeed, in this case, first of all, I need to say that my language is very heteronormative that's because my experience has been hetero. My work has been natural so please excuse me for that and I hope you make the best out of the program, just make the translations as you need. There's quite a few possible benefits that you can have from this program. You can experience a deeper connection to your body, your sexuality, and your femininity. You can be improving your sex life and your relationship. You can becoming more aroused, more sensitive and more orgasmic, which are slightly different things. So more aroused, more easily, more sensitive to touch and different kinds of touch and more orgasmic, more able to experience orgasms and also experiencing new kinds, different kinds of orgasms and orgasmic states. We'll get to what that is later in the program. Other benefits are self-love, self-worth and self-acceptance. So from receiving all of this beautiful attention and touch from your partners, maybe something inside would believe the fact that you're worthy of love and you would love and accept yourself on a deeper level. You might be healing from abuse and trauma. I say that most people have something to heal from. And obviously there's more extreme cases and rape and serious sexual abuse, but also you might have had an ex partner who penetrated you before you were ready. Not consensually or anything, just both of you maybe were not aware of that. Things around society and culture and so on also creates some sexual trauma. So this program is really good for this. Improving conditions like low libido, vaginal dryness, pain during sex or menstrual cramps. And even more, this is, this program and going through the practices is a very empowering practice because you'll learn to receive and you also learn to ask for what you want, to understand what you want and actually be able to ask for it. It improves the creativity because sexual energy is creative energy. So, in my work, everything in the private is also related in affecting the public and what you do in your life and your mission and your creativity and you will definitely start to see this. And higher states of consciousness. So tantra originally, one of the main goals of tantra was to use sex in order to go beyond sex, beyond the body into higher states of consciousness, into enlightenment. So I hear you say, okay, okay. So what do I do? What I need to do in order to experience some of these benefits? First of all, watch the welcome video, either by yourself or with your partner. The welcome video you would see that you need to look at your why. Why are you watching this program? What are some issues and challenges that you are dealing with? What's your intention in watching this program? What do you commit to? And it's very important to have some kind of commitment a few days, sorry, a few minutes a day an hour every weekend, something like that for the program and for the practices. And also, and be aware of your expectations and don't have too many expectations. I specifically recommend that you watch the following sections. So the section about female orgasm, and you might have heard that I'm the author of the book "Orgasm Unleashed: Your Guide To Pleasure, Healing And Power." And this book was endorsed by female sexuality educators around the world. And I really recommend you to do, to watch that section and also to consider reading the book "Orgasm Unleashed." There's a free digital copy included in this program. Watch the section about communications. So how to know what you really, really want so that is you. And it's a really beautiful, a really simple practice there. And I obviously recommend to watch the section and if you were with a partner to also practice it. There's also the three minute game which includes teaching on the wheel of consent that I really recommend watching. I recommend watching the sensual hug which is not just about the hug, but it's actually about a lot of principles that we using in the program. Okay, stuff like presence and connection and whole body awareness, and the fact that women and men get aroused in different ways. So it starts from a hug and it's something that you can use in sex. You can use it in very essential interactions. So that's recommended. And obviously I recommend everything else. So if you can, I really recommend to take the time, the whole program is around eight or nine hours, and yes, it might take, you know watching this over a few days, maybe even over a few weeks but there is so much amazing information both theory and practices in the program. So if looking at your wife, there's some issues and challenges in your sex life, in your relationship, I really recommend watching all of this. And it's true that it's meant to teach the man or let's say the person who's touching the woman what to do, but by you watching this you would get a lot out of this program as well. And you will be able to connect to your body deeper and to explain to your partner how to touch you, what to do and also importantly, what not to do. I recommend you watching the program by yourself. As I mentioned, you can watch it totally alone. You can watch it together with your partner. You can watch it with your girlfriends. This is something really beautiful to share it with sisters. And I think about, you know, sometimes maybe guys watch porn. I don't know if women watch porn together and this is not porn, this is sexual education. There's no sex in the program. There is some nudity obviously, and this is something really beautiful to share with your girlfriends. So instead of just chit chatting, instead of just talking about insignificant things, which I'm sure you don't, but some people may. So really this is a program that can be a conversation starter, okay. So let's watch this video together. And, and what did this guy do? And well, how did this woman react? And, have I been in similar situations? Do I have similar experiences? So this is something that I really recommend you to share with your girlfriends. I also recommend you watch the program again, soon. Soon can be in a few weeks or a few months, and again in the future, in a year or so. And you would see that you understand new things. You pay attention, you notice new things that may be in the first time that you watched it you didn't understand, or didn't notice. And suddenly you're like, Oh, wow, I didn't believe I don't believe this was already in the program, okay. How to make the best out of this program? I really recommend patience and you would hear me saying this again and again. So have patience with yourself, have patience with your partner. Okay, it doesn't matter if you've been together for two weeks or for 20 years. It doesn't matter, whatever the issues are and there might be some issues, you know, in sex life, in a relationship, your issues, his issues, global issues, whatever. Really important that you develop patience. And patience by itself is both a practice and it's a goal. So yeah, really, really, really important. And especially in those moments when you go like, fuck it, I'm not experiencing anything or you're not doing it right or whatever, you know? So, just develop patience. No comparisons. So don't compare yourself to the model or models in the program. The models are not professional models, it's a name for a person who's demoing something. So yeah, in some of the demos the woman might be really orgasmic and really sensitive to the touch. It's good if, you know, don't compare yourself to her. Don't compare yourself also to yourself yesterday or to your girlfriend, that's if you watching this with girlfriends, okay. Everybody has their own experience which also is related to patience. So yeah, you might be similar to the woman that you see on the screen, you might be different and you also might be changing. No expectations, very important. Don't expect yourself to orgasm. Don't expect yourself to have any of the experiences that I talk about in the program. Don't expect your partner to suddenly know and to do what I do. So I'm a professional, I've been doing it for many years. And don't, you know it's really important to not have expectations. And if you don't have expectations, you can only be surprised for the best. Other things to make the best out of this program, remember that he's not the only one learning. So this program is teaching him some stuff but it's really important that you also do your own work. Self-pleasure, healing, empowerment, this is why I recommend the, reading the book, "Orgasm Unleashed," and also there's a private Facebook group for women only in that case that I support women going through the book and going through their practices. So it's really important to understand that both of you need to be doing your work, work is a funny word ey? It's your personal exploration, your personal discoveries, your personal journeys. So, yeah, it's important to remember. It is a journey. Some things take time, it's a process. You might experience something amazing one day and then not be able to have it, to experience it again for a few weeks. So yeah, just keep going. It's important to celebrate the experiences, whatever you experience, you know, even if it's just a small orgasm or just a few orgasms in a row, or just emotional release in a massage session, really celebrate that. Celebrate it with your partner, celebrate it by yourself. Celebrate it with your girlfriends and obviously attend to any hurdles, any resistance, anything that is challenging you. It's important not just to run away from that but to look at that and to practice that. And we have also a Facebook group for the people, both men and women who are watching this program where you can share your questions. You can share both your celebrations and also your challenges and ask for support there. And I'll be visiting that group weekly and supporting you and other people there. How to help your partner? There are a few things that you can do to help your partner as he, or as they are going through the program. Again, patience really important. Clear and gentle communications. And this is something that when I work with couples that come to see me for a private couple session or for Skype session, sometimes the woman is quite intense, quite sometimes even not aggressive but she's expresses herself in the way that doesn't make the man feel good. So it's good to be honest, you know, with each other but really focus on the positive and see how compassionate here you can be. And yeah, focusing on the positives for example is whenever he's doing something or they're doing something that you enjoy, something that, it's not even enjoy, it's not just pleasure, it just feels right. Just say yes, right there. And the word yes is one of the sexiest word in the English language, in any language. Okay, it's so simple. If you don't need to think about the right words to say, just say yes, yes and then you can add right there. Don't change anything, keep doing that. Because honestly, men sometimes they try to make something even better and then they will change what they're doing and when I say men I also mean myself. And it's very important that you're clear with your partner and you say that and so he doesn't try to do anything else, he doesn't change. And that's, by the way the same thing with you. Ask your partner, don't teach your partner, okay. So don't tell him, "Ah, this is how you do this. And this was taught in the program Awakening Female Pleasure." No, you just, you can just say, would you. Would you do this for me? Would you do this with me? Would you touch me in this way? Would you hold me in this way? And would you slow down? This is why the section on how to know what you really, really want and the three minute game are really important. So again, refer to those sections for a very easy exercise that would, very simple exercise that would help you understand what you want, express what you want and communicate if what you want, is what you're getting is not exactly what you asked for. Other things to help your partner, if something doesn't work, go back to what does work. So don't stay stuck on something just go back a stage or just go to something else and just make a note to go back to that technique, to that aspect in another day. And again, you don't have to get everything in this program, okay. You're not getting, there's not tests and you don't not getting graded by the end of this program. It's important to give your partner positive feedback after every experience, okay. And this isn't really how you integrate, how you ground that the learnings and the experiences every time. Specifically, you can say I really loved it when you did this and that. But you can also include some constructive feedback and you can also, it's really important to take responsibility as well. So you can say, Oh, it's like you are doing it really amazing and then I felt, you know too much pleasure and I stopped you. And you know, maybe next time we'll try to, we'll try it again. Do some of the practices for him. So although the program is Awakening Female Pleasure, it's generally we can call it awakening pleasure and you can definitely do a lot of what you see in this program for him, or again, for her, for your partner, whoever they are. And also give what you want to receive, okay. So if you want to receive something and it's really important that you give it and this is also how you show your partner how you like to be touched. Or you just serve them, you just touch them according to how they like to be touched. A few things might come up and it's really important to acknowledge that. It's not just, you know, beautiful orgasms and so on. You might have, you know triggers. Triggers is a very triggering word by itself. And if you're together with a partner for a while and the triggers might be about something that is totally unrelated and it would just come up, okay. He didn't, you know, the fucking toilet seat as an example, okay. He didn't do something, he didn't pick up the children last week, whatever that was. And in the middle of the session you will suddenly be consumed by anger about that. Or obviously he might say something, do something which doesn't work for you in the session itself. Session is anything, you know, hugging, eye gazing, breathing together, breast massage, sensual massage, Yoni massage, sex, foreplay, whatever that is, okay. So you might have some triggers coming up. It's important that you own those triggers, you are aware that if you're triggered, there's, you might have a trigger. And yes, he or they might be doing something which is not working, not harmonious. but still if something is triggering look at your trigger as well and find the language to express that. If you need to pause you can pause. Pausing by itself is a really good thing to do anyway. Strong emotions might come up. Joy is really great, but they can be fear, sadness and anger. Allow yourself to express that. Not, don't express that towards your partner just generally express that and you can say to your partner "It's not about you, that I'm angry. I'm just having some anger come up. And it's really beautiful that the anger is coming up and is expressed." Some memories might come up from either negative experiences or just unrelated memories. And I really recommend to stay in the body, to stay in the experience right now not to start analyzing things that might or might not have happened years ago. Okay, so just stay in the body, in the present moment. There might be shame, guilt or remorse. So shame and guilt specifically about sexuality and sexual expressions. Guilt about things that you've done or things that you want to do, desires, fantasies that you judge yourself about, okay. So just be aware of those. And once you recognize that it's shame, once you recognize that it's guilt it's not controlling you anymore and this is something to really journal about, share with your partner and if you feel to also share in the group or contact me personally if you need some support with this. Other things that might come up is strange sensations. So, this happened a lot in many sessions, in many bodywork sessions that have held. And even when I do, I hold the orgasmic activation for women, over phone, on Skype. So women all over the world and I just talk to them and I guide them and they start to have some great sensations and beautiful sensations. And some of them are strange. (clears throat) Specifically in, specifically in a Yoni massage for example, when somebody's touching your G-spot, you might have some strange sensations and allow it. If it feels bad, you know, it feels wrong, if it's really painful and you tried it for awhile you can ask your partner to stop or to change to do something else. I recommend to allow that for a while as long as it's not painful. Again, so don't go against your body, but just have an attitude of exploration and see what happens because strange sensations might actually turn into pleasure. It's sometimes a new kind of pleasure that you don't, you're not used to. And then once you get used to it, once you accept it as pleasure, you can start enjoying it. You might actually have pain and the body remembers the body holds a lot of pain. And with the pain, don't go, don't push too much against the pain, but also don't run away from the pain. And it's similar to receiving a whole body massage. If you receive a whole body massage and you have some pain in your back, you don't tell the massage person, "Ah, don't massage me there." You tell them yes, yes. I have a sore spot there. Please work on that, okay. So this might be very, very well might be in the body as well. And even I worked with women who were, you know quite sexually expressive and orgasmic and so on. And they had some pains lurking in the body. You might have a feeling of numbness which is something between pain and strange sensation. Feeling like, yeah it's very like, I'm clear what you're feeling there. So numbness is a kind of sensation. So again, just allow that and be with that for awhile. And you might have nothing in, nothing in parenthesis, knowing in quotations. So yeah, maybe for a while, nothing happens. You're not feeling anything special. Okay, you're not feeling anything in the session. You're not feeling anything after the session. That's okay. That happens sometimes. So again, don't have expectations. Don't have expectations to have a half an hour orgasm on the first time that you are, that you do this, not even ever. Okay, so just accept the nothing when nothing happens. And just keep going. Just explore the same technique, just try a different practice. And again, go to the Facebook group, share your experience, ask for advice. Other people and myself going to support you. And I always, I saw this so many times that somebody didn't feel anything and then after a few weeks or a few days, sometimes after a few hours even after a few minutes, she, she felt a lot. And yeah that's the next thing that might happen might come. You might have a lot of pleasure, different kinds of pleasure, pleasure from different kinds of your body and obviously orgasm. Different kinds of orgasm, different strength and length and intensities and kinds and feelings of orgasm. Watch the female orgasm presentation section to know more about that. So yes, keep calm and keep going. I sometimes say also keep calm and keep cumming and just accept everything is part of the journey, is part of the process. And it's important that you journal, it's important that you share with your partner. If possible, share in the group and keep at it, really keep at it. Don't lose the, your dedication and your commitment to this program. This stuff works. It has worked for so many people and I'm sure it would work for you as well. So, introduce yourself in the group. If you may share your three takeaways in the group as well. Okay, what you got out of this video. And I hope, I really hope that you would watch as much of the program as you can. And I'm looking forward to hear how this is working for you specifically as a woman, okay. So most of my work has been with women and I created this program for men in order to help them, to help them to touch, pleasure, connect with women on a deeper level. And thus indirectly I'm helping women with this program. So thank you for allowing me to share this. Instructor: Female orgasm, what you need to know. So this is all starting with some really important theory. It's important to know some theory before we actually get our fingers wet. This presentation is based on my book "Organism Unleashed Your Guide to Pleasure, Healing and Power" which was endorsed by many, many female sexuality educators. So it's a book for women helping them how to become orgasmic by themselves. And it's also a book for wise men who understand that if they read some books for women, they would actually get really amazing insights. So this presentation just sums some of the information in the book. The book itself is quite long and there is a digital version of the book included in the program. You're welcome to find it in the resources section as well. So the most important thing to remember before we starting talking about orgasm is debt. It's important to pleasure her, but not to pressure her. So pleasure her, but don't pressure her to orgasm because this is something that I hear from some women. They're with a guy and the guy is pleasuring them and they are happy that the guy is pleasuring them, but in the same time, they feel a little bit of pressure or stress debt. They need to orgasm. Sometimes they just imagining it, the guy is not actually pressuring them, but sometimes there's like an expectation, because for men it's so easy to orgasm, at least to have some kind of orgasm. And sometimes it's like you see porn and they fake a lot in porn and you start expecting that women would orgasm. So really important that you focus on pleasure, you focus on connection, you focus on exploration and orgasm might happen. And if it happens, it's great, if it doesn't happen, it's okay. Not all orgasms were created equal. So in society we talk about orgasm basically as one thing. It can be maybe a strong orgasm or long orgasm, but it's just one thing. And one of the main thing that we're gonna see now is that there's actually many, many different kinds of orgasms. And generally speaking, there are two important kind of orgasms that we need to talk about. So these are explosive versus implosive orgasms. And explosive orgasm sounds good. It's not as good as it sounds. And let's see why. Let's talk about first explosive orgasms. I'm gonna ask you a question that might seem unrelated at first, but that's exactly the thing that's gonna help you understand more about female orgasms. So the question is, how do you feel after you ejaculate? So when you ejaculate, that might be fun for a few seconds, but most men shared that they lose erection, they lose focus, they become tired. They might even go to sleep. And many men also say that they lose a little bit of the connection with their partner. So before you ejaculate, you're totally in love with her, you think she's the most beautiful and attractive woman in the world. And after you ejaculate, you still love her and you still care for her, but you're less interested in being with her and maybe you wanna check your phone or your Facebook feed or whatever. So this is really similar to how women feel after they have a clit orgasm. So clit orgasms, which are also called explosive orgasms are explosive, which means the woman loses the energy, loses the sexual energy and this is why she has a few side effects. Okay? You can see the clitoris here in this diagram at the top of the vagina. So explosive orgasms are short, sharp and intense, which means that women who are able to have orgasms, to have at least these kind of orgasms, it doesn't take too long to have them. If a woman uses a vibrator, many times you can have that in a few minutes. So when the orgasm happens, it's quite short. So the orgasm itself takes I know, five seconds, 10 seconds, 15 seconds. It feels very sharp and very intense, okay, compared to the other kinds of orgasms that we're gonna discuss in a moment. Usually this orgasm is felt in the genital area, which means it's not a whole body orgasm, but mostly the pleasure is in the genital area. And the next thing is very important and this is one of the things that you can see when a woman had explosive orgasm, which is her clit becomes hypersensitive and she might push you away. This is something that I found very, very interesting and weird and that was before I heard about this explosive orgasm thing. So I was going down on a woman and she was really enjoying it and then she was orgasming, she would push me away. And I wouldn't understand why a second earlier, you were you enjoying it so much and when you orgasming, you're pushing me away. So the reason is that because she loses her sexual energy, everything becomes hypersensitive and it really feels uncomfortable and even painful if you keep giving her clitoral stimulation or if she keeps using the vibrator directly on her clit during or straight after a clitoral orgasm. The woman might feel that she came, she feels done, but she's not deeply satisfied. Okay? So it's kind of like, oh, I had your orgasm, did you have your orgasm? Okay, onto the next thing. Her libido and interest in sex might drop. It doesn't happen for everyone but what they suggest to women is that if they avoid this kind of orgasms, they would have even more libido. There will be more wet. The body would be more ready for sex. There will be more interested in sex. So another thing, another side effect that they might feel is feeling disconnected and even sad. And women tell me the same thing that I shared about what men sometimes share, this connection. So one of the reasons to have sex and relationship is for connection and that's a very sad feeling to have this disconnection. So a woman might feel disconnected from herself, from her body, from her partner. Some women feel sad and even a bit frustrated, angry, depressed, various things. One thing that I heard from women, a few things that I heard from women. For example, I agree that external clitoral-only orgasms do leave me feeling depleted. Another woman said I have only had explosive clitoral orgasms and I was always left feeling like I was missing something, okay? Because as I said, there's a very shallow level of satisfaction. It's not a deep satisfaction. And let's talk about implosive orgasm. So this was explosive orgasms and again, they sound really good. I had an explosive orgasm, but actually an explosion means that you lose the energy. So let's talk about implosive orgasms and how they feel like. One of the things that I say in the book is that orgasm is the accumulation of pleasure, not the release of pleasure, which means when you come, it doesn't finish. When you start coming, when you start orgasming and when a woman starts orgasming, it's actually building pleasure. So a few characteristics of implosive orgasms. First of all, they take longer to build, but they're much longer than explosive orgasms. So sometimes it takes 20 minutes, half an hour or sometimes even an hour of foreplay and stimulation and sex and (indistinct) massage and whatever to have implosive orgasms. And as we can see later in the program also, you can have different kinds of orgasms even with less time, but for very deep orgasms, very strong orgasms, sometimes yes, it takes some time. So you need patience and she needs patience. But then when the woman actually orgasms, the orgasm lasts much, much longer than explosive orgasm. So it can last for half a minute to one minute or a few minutes, or as we can see later, even more than that. While explosive or clitoral orgasms are kind of like one-dimensional, implosive orgasms, all of the other kinds of orgasms have different kinds of sensations, different kinds of pleasure, different kind of orgasm and different kind of experiences. It's a whole body experience rather than a genital experience. And it can easily become multiple orgasms. So once a woman has implosive orgasms and by the way, you as well, 'cause for men, it's very similar as well. When you start avoiding delaying ejaculation and sometimes avoiding ejaculation, you start having whole body orgasms, not ejaculatory orgasms as well. So same thing for women. The orgasm can become multiple orgasms and she keeps the energy so she keeps being aroused and she's ready for more. So if you wanna have sex longer with a woman, if you wanted to orgasm many times and if you wanted to stay aroused and to stay connected with you, keep giving her this kind of orgasm and avoid explosive orgasms. This orgasm is deeply satisfying, deeply nourishing, deeply empowering. It's kind of like she's ready for more, but she's so satisfied on a very, very deep level. And some women say it's like it keeps them going for days and sometimes for weeks, once they have really good sexual experience with one of these kind of orgasms. Here's a nice graph. I really like to show things in graphs 'cause you kind of like for me as a geek, I really like to show this on the graph. So you can see with the explosive orgasm that it takes a shorter time to build and then it drops off very, very fast after the peak of the orgasm and then it's game over. Implosive orgasm takes much longer, but the peak is kind of like very, very wide. Okay? And after the peak, it takes a very long time until the sexual energy and the pleasure dissipates. And actually the woman might keep a certain level of pleasure in her body for hours afterwards. In the book I say orgasm is the beginning of sex, not the end of sex. Another woman said, "I have been practicing implosive orgasms and I'm surprised at how easy it is. I always thought that they wouldn't manage so I just put up with clitoral orgasms, but I have to say implosive orgasms are much more satisfying and now I feel like having sex every day." So if you want your lover, your partner, your woman to feel like having sex every day, it's very important that you avoid the clitoral explosive ones and you focus on the implosive. I just wanna say there's no problem with the clitoris, the clitoris is beautiful. And even the explosive organisms are beautiful. It's just, we know that there's more. So there's no problem with the clit itself. The question is what is serving and what is not serving. Okay? So we will see in a moment how to actually enjoy clitoral stimulation, how can you can give clitoral stimulation for the woman and she can still enjoy it without exploding. So this will be our next video, how to help her implode. Instructor: How to help her implode. In the previous video we saw why implosive orgasms are the new black, why explosive orgasms actually deplete your woman from her orgasmic capacity, from her pleasure, and why implosive orgasms are so much better for her, and also for you too, for your sex, for also supporting you in your pleasure. It's much better to experience implosive orgasms. So how to have them, how to help her implode. So first of all, when. When can you practice this? When can you actually help her implode? The first thing is in an awakening session. So awakening female pleasure, this program, teaching you many ways how to hold an awakening session, clothes on, clothes off, with or without genital touch. Obviously you can have a Yoni or vaginal massage, specifically more focused on the vagina. We're going to get there later in the program. You can do this in foreplay or even in making out. Okay? So sometimes I hug a woman, you know, clothes on, in a public place, and she starts orgasming in my hands, and this is because my attention and intention is not about giving her some, giving, it's not really giving her, but facilitating some big orgasm, but the focus is on connection. The focus is on feeling, and pleasure, and expression. So that's why this happens. And when you're making out, when you're having foreplay, even with a bit of genital or whole body touch, it's very important to help her to implode so she doesn't lose her energy. Later in your foreplay, when you are having oral sex and also using your fingers, this is a really good opportunity to help her implode. Most guys in this case would actually either don't know what they're doing, or they're gonna apply too much stimulation and might result in a explosive orgasm. So you have to be careful there. You have to be really gentle throughout this program. And I keep repeating the idea that always go slower than what you think, softer than what you think. Wait a bit before you get anywhere, pause when you get there, all really important principles and reminders. And obviously when you're having sex, it's important that you recognize if she's building towards an explosive orgasm, if her body tenses up, if she, if her breath kind of becomes sharp and shallow. If there's kind of like a feeling of urgency. If you are in missionary position, this is something that has effect because it rubs the clitoris, so straight missionary position, when you're just on top of her, many times actually results in a clitoral orgasm, or if she's riding you and leaning forward, that's also something that might result in, you know, an explosive orgasm. So bringing awareness to that, and instead in the sex, you can build the pleasure in a way that doesn't make it explode, but keeps keeps her on the edge. Keeps building it, as we'll see in a moment. So how? How to help her implode. The first thing, and again, I'm saying it now, I'm repeating it throughout the program. The more you relax, the more she relaxes. Okay? The problem with many couples that I see is that usually the man's body is tired, the man's body is tensed, and he's doing things, and this is something that is stressing out the woman. And it's really important that both of you are relaxed. Your ejaculation control is easier, whatever you learn in this program will be easier if your body is relaxed, and if your mind is relaxed. And this is obviously something which is much bigger than just this program. It's about, you know, meditation every day. It's about doing some gentle yoga, or stretching, or whatever it is to be in your body. It's about dance. And generally it's about embodiment, and also it's about a life skill on how you can stay relaxed, whatever happens in life. The next thing, really important, and again, kind of like not just a technique, but a core principle in my work is that you have pause, which means whenever you go somewhere, whenever you go to a new place in her body, whenever you do something new, pause, and also every few minutes, you can take a moment and pause. Literally, you can put a timer, you know every five minutes or so, that it rings, and then for 30 seconds, or even for one minute, you just pause, you just breathe together. You just look in each other's eyes. I know it sounds simplistic, but seriously, this is one of the things that transformed my, first of all my sex life, transformed my healing sessions, transformed my life generally. I literally have timers in my clock that go off multiple times a day and just remind me to pause. So this is something that you can definitely explore. In order to help her implode, you need to avoid explosive or clitoral orgasms. And again, there's no problem with the clit. We love the clit. It's great, it's beautiful. But we need to avoid giving it too much stimulation, especially if the woman is prone to having explosive orgasms. And she might get frustrated, you know? She might ask you to rub her clit, or she might rub her clit herself, and, you know, it's okay if she does. Don't shame her for this, don't judge her for this. But it's important if you share this information with her. Share this program with her. Share the book, Orgasm Unleashed, because literally there is a whole chapter there focused on showing women, giving them insight into this kind of orgasms, giving them testimonials and sharing from other women, and also teaching them how to do that. So it's important that you do this. And it's also important that you delay or avoid your own ejaculation. And again, this is a little bit outside of the scope of this program. You can find in the resources section some really important information about ejaculation control, and the idea that you can have, you can enjoy beautiful orgasms, and a lot of pleasure, and whole body orgasms without ejaculation. So you're not sacrificing your pleasure, you're not losing anything. You can actually have pleasure which is similar to what the woman has, and by doing this, by changing how you experience orgasm, by changing how you experience sex, you actually change it for the woman that you're with. So I've been with women who are totally new to tantra, new to all of this stuff, and because I wasn't ejaculating, they started to have new experiences. Okay, so just because of this. And it's another reminder that whatever you want to do for your woman, it's really important that you do for yourself. Okay? So you don't just focus on doing something for her, on getting her somewhere, you also try to do this by yourself, for yourself, and this is what really creates the deeper transformation. So if you're interested in this, find more in the resources section. The thing with the pause, which is also called edging, is the idea that you need to get to the edge of pleasure, to the point of no return, and once you get to the point of no return, you need to pause. So if you look at the 80%, the graph, (laughs quickly) I really like graphs. Again, I'm a nerdy kind of guy, and looking at the graph helps me understand it more clearly. So look at the pleasure starting to rise. And then, when the pleasure reach 80%, if you keep going on she would have, if she is an orgasmic woman, you know, she might have an explosive orgasm if you give her, for example, clitoral stimulation. And with this clitoral stimulation, again, she would lose the energy. So instead, once you get to 80%, and how do you know if she's at 80%? You don't know, there's no, uh, she doesn't have digital display on her tummy, where you can look what's going on. But you can ask her for her feedback, and gradually learn to identify when she's getting really, really aroused, too aroused, and then you pause. So you pause, you take your fingers off, you stop with your oral sex, or whatever it is that you're doing, and you just let her relax for a few seconds, for half a minute. And you don't have to completely pause. You can, you know, go up and kiss her, and lay on top of her and hug her, and so on. You can go other parts in her body. And it's really important, this pause, because it allows the energy to relax a little bit, and also it's a little bit of the teasing dynamic, or teasing principle, or hinting, as I like to call it. So it's not that bad kind of teasing. By keeping her on the edge, as you see from this graph, for a long time, instead of having one explosive orgasm, she will be in a mild orgasmic state for long minutes, maybe for half an hour you can keep a woman in this state. So this is really important. Equally applies for you as well, for ejaculation control. But when you're doing this with a woman, especially when you're teaching her how to move from explosive clitoral orgasms into an orgasmic state, and then later into deeper orgasms, vaginal orgasms, full body orgasms, multiple orgasms, and so on, this technique is really important. It's called the pause, or edging. So what other things to do to help her implode? So another thing is finger tracing. So finger tracing is that you, if you are touching around her clit, and around her yoni, you're tracing your finger down into her yoni. Okay? Into her vagina. And you, by this, you're creating a new energy pathway, a new neuro pathway. So you, she's used to have a lot of pleasure focused on her clit or around her clit, and when you take your finger, and you slide your finger, making sure that she's wet enough, obviously. You slide your finger downwards and inside her yoni, inside her vagina, you actually connect that, you actually move the pleasure from outside to the inside, and connect these two areas of her body. Which leads us to the next thing, which is internal awareness, Which is if you apply stimulation, touch, pleasure, sensation inside the vagina, this is one of the things that actually help her implode, because so many women are so focused on their clit, so focused on rubbing their clit, and vibrators, and asking the men to do that for them, and asking the men to go down them very, very strongly. And with you just literally putting a finger inside her Yoni, and just asking her, you know, how does it feel? Make a sound to express how it feels? You know, this is something that by itself can help her bring more of her energy, more for pleasure inside, and later develop, um, develop, develop sounds very interesting, later experience implosive and whole body orgasms. The next thing is breath and sound. So with breath, I usually mean belly breath. And again, I always come back to this. When you're breathing to your belly, when your breath is relaxed, you are inviting her, even subconsciously and also consciously, to breathe in a relaxed way into her belly. And the other thing is sound. So when you're making a sigh with every out-breath. So (sighing). So when you are breathing out audibly, this is something that again subconsciously invites her to breathe. It's also a very relaxed thing. So people hold the breath when they are anxious, when they are in fear, okay? When they are stressed. And just by you breathing out, this is something that affects the limbic system. And by that, it helps her relax. And by relaxing again, again, I keep saying again because I keep saying this thing, and you will hear me saying these things throughout the program, because seriously, it's not just about the G-spot, and it's not just about that funky technique, that you learn how to activate her or whatever. Really go back to the principles, use the principles. These are the most important things. Okay? So keep breathing, keep making a relaxed sound. And also by inviting her to make, for example, a long 'ah' sound, and you can make this long 'ah' sound together. And this is something that is going to help her relax, gonna help her energy move around her body, gonna let go of some guilt, and shame, and inhibition around sexuality and pleasure, and help her not just experience better orgasms, but to actually experience herself, her body, her sexuality, in a different way. You can just take a deep breath, you can do this right now, and release it with a long 'ah' sound. So deep breath in. (breathing) Ah. So even longer than this. Doing this together would connect you also on a way of rapport, it builds rapport between you. It builds sync between you. It really, really connects you. So she doesn't feel like she's doing this this alone. And again, it also activates your pleasure and your energy. The next thing is movement, and by movement, I mean gentle movement. So sometimes women, like, they don't do anything, which is also okay. We're going to explore this in the program. It's okay to be totally relaxed and don't do much. But if you just invite her to move her hips back and forth, so arching her back and then tucking her tailbone, back and forth, by this, really, like, really doing this gentle movement, not a vigorous movement. This is something that moves her sexual energy, remove some of the tightness and some of the tension from her body, and helps her implode. She can also move her hips side to side or in circles. And generally just invite her, you know, just say, darling, just let your body move as she wants to. Okay? This is also something I use a lot in sexual healing sessions and also in sex. You know, sometimes women feel a little bit tight, and a little bit constricted, so just invite them to move as they want to move. Generally, I suggest it's a little bit difficult sometimes to pick up on that, but sometimes women fake their movements, or they put on a show, okay? So movement should be relaxed, and just as fast as she can still track with her mind, with the consciousness. Okay? So if she starts to move, how can I say that? If she start to move in a way which is disconnected from her body, if she's just making, putting a show, if she's just faking it because she went to some striptease workshop, or saw something on some porn video, she's in her mind, she's not really in her body. The mind and the body needs to be connected together. So if she's moving all around the place, invite her actually to relax a little bit. Spread it is another principle that you can use, which means while you are going down on her, while you are touching her yoni with your fingers, you can caress her body, you can spread the sexual energy from her genitals down her thighs, down her legs, and up her belly, up her chest, towards her neck, throat, head, and also her back. So really think about it. Like, there's a lot of, let's say oil around her genital area, around her hips, and you're using your hands to scoop and to move this oil all around her body. This dissipates some of the energy which is stuck in the hips, and it also helps make it into a more whole body experience that later might result in a whole body orgasm, and different kinds of orgasms as well. In later videos in the program, you will learn about different kinds of touch. Okay. So there's different ways to touch her in order to move her energy. The next video will be more about women's orgasms, different kinds of orgasms, physical orgasms, energy orgasms, chakra orgasms, whatever you wanted to know about orgasms. See you in the next video. The Continuum of Pleasure. In this video, we're gonna talk about how orgasm isn't just one thing, how we can start with a simple, and not just so simple pleasure waves, all the way to ecstasy that lasts for long minutes and sometimes hours. So just to recap, in the previous videos we talked about explosive or clitoral orgasms versus implosive orgasms. And the idea that we're trying to avoid the explosive orgasms is because this is something which has a lot of side-effects for the woman and it's depleting her energy, and it's depleting her interest and kind of like it finishes the experience or might finish the experience. Not for everyone, it's a bit of a generalization, but for many women this is the case, and we also explored how to help her implode. And in this video we're gonna explore many other kinds of orgasms. And now when we're talking about orgasms, we're only talking about implosive orgasms. So the orgasms, where we are keeping their energy, we're circling their energy, challenging their energy, sublimating their energy, whatever you wanna call it. We're not losing the energy, we're not exploding the energy, but we are keeping it in, we are harnessing, we're spreading it around the body. This is really something to focus on, otherwise you don't have energy to work with. Something that I started or a few things that I started hearing from women as I was exploring this many years ago, this one woman that was with, she said after we were together, she said, "I had only one orgasm, it lasted for an hour and a half." And this is really a sentence that obviously I was really happy to hear that. And it kind of like changed the way that I think about orgasm, that I relate to orgasm, that I talk about orgasm, because before I was in the beginners sports of counting orgasms. So this, I gave her five orgasms, to 10 orgasms, to 20 orgasms. And obviously you don't give an orgasm, I didn't give an orgasm. And that's another thing that I learned. And from that I moved into this attitude of an orgasm is a state rather than something, rather than one thing that happens for a moment. So that's a very beautiful, by the way, reason to share your experiences after every time that you making out, having an awakening experience, having sex, really nice to share your experiences and you might hear things like this. Another one of my lovers said, "I didn't orgasm but they had a lot of pleasure." So this was already a very orgasmic woman, many times she would have different kinds of orgasms. And sometimes as she said here, she didn't actually have a peak of an orgasm but she had a lot, a lot, a lot of pleasure. And again, I started asking myself, what does it mean? What's an orgasm, how does it look like? How does it feel like? And I came to the realization that when you expand your definition of orgasm, your orgasm will expand. So if you only see orgasm as a peak, as something that you have to let a woman have to, or you have to, shout and scream and move and moan and shake on the floor and so on. That's yeah, that's one kind of orgasm, but it's many either kinds of orgasms. And even when you have a simple wave of pleasure, when a woman has a simple wave of pleasure, she just has tingling or electricity or feeling of warmth or whatever it is that pleasure feels for her, that's a mini-orgasm. So the idea that every pleasurable sensation is a mini-orgasm, and if you look at, if you consider every pleasure or sensation as a mini-orgasm, you and your partner would have lots of this kind of mini-orgasms. If you just say, ah, it's just pleasure, it's nothing special, it will stay that, it would stay, nothing special. But if you expand your definition of orgasm, if you give it meaning, the pleasure would expand, the orgasm would expand. And this is what gets us to the next idea, next topic, which is the Continuum of Pleasure. Which means that that pleasure manifests in many different ways and in different intensities and in different durations. And it's important to know that because as you're doing an awakening session, as you're pleasuring your woman, as you are helping her orgasm, maybe also as you're helping her heal she would have different experiences, and this would help you put this into context. So the first thing is momentary pleasure. So for a moment you'll just have a wave of pleasure going through her and she might convulse, she might moan, she might have, as I mentioned, like feeling of electricity, tingling, the hair standing on the end, whatever it is, vaginal contractions, whatever it is, it's a moment. And again, this is an orgasmic experience as well. For a brief second, you can say the time stops and she only focuses on the sensation. She doesn't think about yesterday or tomorrow. So this is a mini mini mini-orgasm. The next one is a mild orgasmic state. So when you having foreplay or when you having an awakening session and you keep touching her, you keep facilitating pleasure, either physically or as we see in the program, also not physically, she has lots of this waves of pleasure. And after a while, she might notice that she's actually in a mild orgasmic state. So maybe it's not the big ecstatic orgasm, like maybe the neighbors don't hear that but for sure, this feels good. And for long minutes, maybe for half an hour, maybe for one hour, she would be in an orgasms, in an orgasmic state, which is mild but it's still very special. The next one, after you keep building pleasures you might actually have an orgasm. So one peak of orgasm, we're still talking about implosive orgasms, not explosive orgasm. So the orgasm stays in the body, it moves around the body, it's circulating around the body, it becomes a whole body experience and this is one peak of orgasm. And the next experience is multiple orgasms. That many people consider to be the best thing that a woman can have or a person can have, is multiple orgasms, many peaks of orgasm. And this is indeed a very beautiful experience. And there can be even different kinds of orgasms as multiple orgasms. Some of them might be more shallow, some of them might be deep, more strong, more loud, more focusing on different, or showing themselves in different areas of the body and different emotions and so on, we're gonna talk about that in a moment. But basically you are aware, and if somebody is outside the room, that they're aware that now you're orgasming or now she's orgasming, and now she isn't. It's quite, quite obvious when the orgasm is happening. But the next thing, which is even better than that, is the intense orgasmic state, which means there are so many orgasmic peaks. There are so many multiple orgasms that you don't, or the woman doesn't drop from that state. She stays in ecstasy, she stays in the plateau. And I think about Tibet. You know, it's a very high place, it's not just one big mountain. The whole of Tibet is very high. So she, or maybe you, to get to stay on this ecstatic, intense orgasmic state, and this is a very special experience. It might happen for 10 minutes, it might happen for half an hour. I actually had a client that said something like, "Here I was, a woman that until recently thought she was not orgasmic, in the kind of whole body orgasm that lasted for two hours." So this is possible, I've seen women who were in orgasm for longer. One of my clients was it in kind of a bliss state, so she wasn't maybe moaning and shaking and whatever, but she was in a bliss state that was very orgasmic for three days. So that's possible, don't get too attached to this. As I keep saying, it's okay if there's no orgasm as well, but just so you know, this is possible. Just to see it in a graph, if you can see from left to right, a pleasure wave is kind of like, let's say, half of the pleasure that you can have, or even less. And then you can have the mild orgasmic state, which has many pleasure waves. And then you have one, you or her, have one peak orgasm and then many peaks become a multiple orgasm. And then when she doesn't drop from the orgasm but she stays up in a very high level of pleasure and ecstasy, that's intense orgasmic state. So the orgasmic state is a new way to look at pleasure, a new way to look at orgasm. I really recommend you to start looking at it, as they say. And also the idea that you're not having an orgasm, you're becoming orgasmic, or the woman is becoming orgasmic. Instructor: Let's talk about Physical Orgasms. A little bit of another diagram just for you to see, have a look at the diagram, pause the video if you need to. This diagram is also in your resources. You can download it, you can print it, okay. Just so you know better the female anatomy. And with physical orgasms, the first one that we talked about already is the clit orgasm, okay. Short and sharp peak followed by an immediate decline of pleasure and interest and libido and the ability to orgasm, talked about it already a lot. And this is something, as I mentioned, it's okay to touch the clit, don't avoid the clit but be really, really careful, some women don't like direct clitoral stimulation. If they do, maybe they are used to or maybe even addicted to clitoral stimulation or clitoral orgasm. So you can share some of the information in this course and watch the video with the by the book organism, at least for the, you know read this together just so they are aware that there is clitoral orgasm, specifically explosive orgasms are depleting them. Next, we have the vaginal entrance. So just the entrance of the vagina, is a very, very sensitive area, okay. This is an area that you can touch with your fingers or when you're having sex with the tip of your cock, you can just hang out there in the entrance of the vagina, which feels very nice for most women, because if you're there for while, they would want you to come in, they would want you to penetrate either with your tongue, your fingers or your cock. And if you give a lot of stimulation to this area, she might have an orgasm in this area. In this orgasm is, might be explosive okay, not always. It feels more rock at me. It feels more, more sharp still compared to all of the other kinds of orgasms. And generally you would want to apply some stimulation here, some pleasure here and then continue inwards. And also remember to include the rest of the value. The next one is kind of like very, very famous, okay. So the G-spot orgasm named after some male scientist that apparently discovered the G-spot obviously she was already, she was always there. So the G-spot, if you, if the woman is lying on her back and you are between her legs and she's on her back and you insert your finger into her yony, into a vagina facing up and then you curl your finger in the "come here" movement, okay as if you are gesturing for somebody to come here, you would, we would with let's say two knuckles in, you would find a G-spot. And G-spot orgasm feels very, very different than a clitoral orgasm. It feels deeper and not just physically, but emotionally the pleasure is very intense, but it's in some ways it's more round, okay. It takes longer to build and longer to unfold. So it's a longer orgasm. And also the woman would stay in kind of like an afterglow for a longer time. It feels more emotional in a good way. So feeling of love, feeling of you knew and feeling of surrender. This is the G-spot organism might be related to the woman feeling like she needs to pee or sometimes it might be related to female ejaculation. And with female ejaculation again, don't be too, don't get too attached to this if she has it or not many men there. I know that I have in the past, put pressure on my partners to have female ejaculation. It might happen, it might not happen. We're gonna late in the program when we talk about vaginal massage, you only massage. We're gonna talk about more about this and you're gonna see this with a live model, okay in the video demos. So the next one is the cervical orgasm or the uterine orgasm. The cervix is the entrance to the womb, okay. And sometimes a woman would have an orgasm that comes from stimulation of this area. So we're talking about if you stimulate these areas, the woman might have an orgasm in these areas. So cervical orgasm feels even deeper than a G-spot orgasm. First of all, because it's deeper in the body. But also because energetically there's something very sacred, very beautiful about this area of a woman's body, because this is, you can say this is a pole, a feminine pole, energetic pole. And it's a very, very precious area, physically, emotionally, energetically, spiritually, creatively. And some women might hold some tension and maybe some pain there. And maybe they were pounded by a partner. So there might be some pain in this area, but in the same time, once you apply enough gentle touch there and some healing there, there's potential for very, very deep orgasms. The orgasms are very, very fulfilling in a way which is beyond physical, okay. It's not just a physical feeling. It's a total feeling of fulfillment and happiness and joy and contentment and kind of like, oh I can, I'll be happy to have, you know, 10 more of this. But if, even if this was my only orgasm today or this week, I'm feeling very deeply satisfied, okay. This is an experience that many women share. They might cry. Also with the G-spot orgasm, you know, they cry kind of like a good cry, surrender cry. They feel a connection to themselves, their femininity, their maybe the whole line of the feminine, their mother and grandmother and so on connected to you, connected to love, connected to the universe, connected to God, okay. That this is something that starts happening with this orgasms. And some people would say that some women have shared with me it's like before they were virgins, before they, so they might have had sex for many years but once they had this kind of orgasm, they felt that a really became women, okay. So again, no need to get too attached to this. Just be aware that it happens, it's possible. The next orgasm is anal orgasm. There's a lot, there's too much focus in the media and porn on anal sex. I feel and it's okay to explore it. It is no problem to explore it, explore, like enjoy it. But don't insist on this many women actually more and more women let's say are starting to be traumatized by guys wanting them to do anal maybe forcing them, not forcing them as in rape, but forcing them as insisting and insisting, insisting and not doing it in the right way without enough preparation, without enough lubrication, without enough sensitivity. Okay, so just be aware of that. Having said all that, it's totally okay to, it's a healthy and natural expression of sexuality to have anal sex and to experience and possibly experience in the longer orgasms. There's some women that shared with me that if they don't receive anal stimulation at least once a month or twice a month, they start to having this heaviness that they cannot dissipated. They cannot move in any other way and they need this anal stimulation either with by themselves with their finger or with lindale or from their lover, from their love's fingers or their lover's cock in order to activate and in order to dissipate the energy in this area. And anal orgasm feels kind of like more wild, more raw and it might be explosive. Sometimes it depends on the woman, but this is something that you can explore again with patients with softness, with sensitivity with enough lubrication, with enough preparation. And also this is something that I recommend you as a man. And again, I'm generally talking to men watching this program. I recommend you to explore this by yourself and also even receive this from somebody else. It doesn't mean that you are gay, if you are gay it's also okay. And if you're not gay, it's okay to still receive anal stimulation from your partner or even sometimes from a practitioner. I can share that I received a few anal massages from my lover at the time. And afterwards that evening, evening after I received two sessions actually, I had one of the most amazing orgasmic and lovemaking experiences of my life, okay. So this is highly recommended, not so much in the scope of this program but now I shared with you, you can explore that. The next kind of orgasm, physical orgasm is the nipple orgasm. So if you apply enough stimulation for a woman, to an a woman's nipples, some women might experience a nipple orgasm. The nipple by the way related and connected with energy channels to the clit. And sometimes it would feel like a lot of nipple stimulation might feel very, very sharp. Someone would have enjoy it, someone would not enjoy it. You can explore what your woman enjoys. Next orgasm is the urinary orgasm. Usually it happens when you apply a lot of stimulation. And in an awakening session or during sex and the woman needs to go to pee, but she doesn't pee she holds it in. And then I do in bed or if she goes to the toilet and she starts urinating, she starts peeing. Many times she would have a very beautiful orgasm that comes from the release. So she was holding, holding, holding, holding, holding and then suddenly she lets go. She starts to pee. And just from this action of letting go, she's having an orgasm. More physical orgasms. So there's another special organism that comes from the throat. So if you insert your finger and touch the back of the throat and you can do this to yourself right now, the back palate, there's kind of like a soft area there that can be orgasmic, can be very pleasurable both for men and for women. Also during deep throating, this is something that activates the back of the throat especially if the woman holds her breath and can take you quite deep into her throat. And again, in society, we think that a woman gives a steep throat into a man to pleasure the men but actually when a woman really relaxes into it and she does it for her own pleasure and also for your pleasure, but she focuses on her own pleasure. She relaxes into the feeling and the sensation of having a cock in her mouth and down her throat. She learns how to stop her breath. She learns how to relax her body. She starts having very, very deep, very, very special orgasms that in some ways they are very sublime, okay. It's like feeling of like you look at her and she looks like in a trance. Okay, she starts moaning, she starts convulsing and kind of like the energy goes very high. And at the same time, they are also intense and can be really raw orgasm. Okay, so this is a very deep, very beautiful orgasm. Many times the woman would start to have very oily, very, a lot of secretions from her throat, okay like different secretions. Sometimes it's more foamy and sometimes if she takes it in her hands, literally it's and she separates her hands that this oily let's call it throat ejaculation can extend between her two hands, okay. Quite there, quite interesting to see that. The next orgasm is the A-spot. We refer again to the diagram that you can see from the female anatomy and the A-spot. Let's say if you put your fingers inside when the woman is on her back and you insert your fingers, the first thing you're gonna find is that G-spot okay. And if you extend your fingers even deeper than that, okay that would be the A-spot. What down teary your fornix spot. And the A-spot feels kind of between the G-spot and the cervix so it's there physically and it's kind of like intense, but it starts to be more sublime if that makes sense. Many women are really surprised by this area that it's also feels a bit tender and a bit sensitive, but as I all the time say in this program, do it gradually, do it gently, at least start gently, start gradually sometimes even just put your finger there. And then after a while this area would awaken and you can do this for a while. And there's very beautiful orgasms that come from that. The next spot is exactly the opposite spot. So it's under the cervix called the PFE or the posterior fornix. Because it's still in the vagina but once you're doing this and I'm gonna get doing later, in a later video, you can see this on the live model. This area shares the same wall, the same wall in the body as the rectum, okay. So I sometimes call this a clean anal this area. It feels sometimes a little bit anal. It feels more raw. Sometimes a woman would literally feel like, I'm having something in heinous, which I don't. And if you arouse this area enough, the woman might have an orgasm here. The next spot is the K-spot which is in the base of the spine, okay. The tailbone generally the lower back in the sacrum is very, very sensitive. And if you just put your finger on the tailbone on the tip of the spine, this is something which is very sensitive by itself. And if you're arouse this area enough, she might have a K-spot orgasm also related to kundalini, not gonna go there too much. It's a word which is used too much but let's say it's another orgasm that might feel like there's convulsions or waves going up your body. And generally it's like we're talking about specific areas in the body that a whole-body orgasm is something that literally the whole-body feels tingling. The whole-body feels pleasurable. The whole-body feels like it's radiating and shining and convulsing and the woman can't tell anymore where's the orgasm and literally feels like the whole-body is orgasmic. Narrator: Other kinds of orgasms. Some women practice yoga specifically in yoga when you hold positions for quite a long time, let's say a few minutes. And then they, in some positions, in some asanas, they might have an orgasm. Later they come to the teacher and says, "Oh, I just had an orgasm. "Is that okay?" So yeah, it's totally okay if she has that. Same thing with men, by the way, men can also experience this and men can experience a lot of the things we talked about. Maybe not the cervical orgasm but many other things. Giggle-gasm, sometimes a woman goes into crazy, crazy laughter. So maybe it's just laughter and maybe it becomes an orgasm. Somebody who can listen to different kinds of music and have waves of pleasure going through your body. Sometimes you might cry which I consider to be another kind of orgasm. Dance-gasm, okay? So many women dance and especially more towards more vigorous, mock ecstatic, more physical dancing and sometimes by themselves, sometimes with somebody else and they experience orgasm. Birth-gasm, also known as orgasmic birth. So some women train themselves while they're pregnant to have an orgasmic birth. And this is something very special. You can find videos about this. Meditation-gasm, sometimes women. And again, also men sit in meditation especially in meditation retreat. When you sit for a few hours every day and many, many women, likely some women report that after a few hours, or after a few days of retreat they start to have orgasm while they're meditating. So they're meditating and their whole body is convulsing and shaking in orgasm. I heard it while I was in some retreats and it was interesting that I was sitting there and my whole body was painful and they were sitting there and their whole body was orgasmic, okay? Chakra orgasms, not going to go into that too much. Chakras are energy centers in the body and a woman might have, again, or men can have an orgasm on the root chakra that might feel more raw and more wild. On the second chakra, in the area of the genitals, that might feel more watery and more sensual. On the third chakra in the navel, that might feel more fiery and intense. On the fourth chakra in the area of the heart, feel more airy, more related to love and compassion and union. On the fifth chakra in the area of the throat which would feel more transcendent and more firm, maybe some images from different realms, orgasm on the six chakra or the third eye, which would feel like mental clarity, total mental quietness instead of having the monkey mind and all of the thoughts. It's literally orgasmic to have your mind totally quiet, and maybe having some insights and some very deep insights already from the throat chakra orgasm it stops being about the pleasure. Sorry, even just from the heart chakra, it's not just about the pleasure it's about something more than the physical pleasure. And finishing with the crown chakra at the top of the head orgasm where it's about the solution of the ego, the solution of personality and union with the divine. So again, not about the physical but literally this is why sex can be spiritual. Sex is spiritual where you can experience this kind of orgasm. So there's much more about all of these kinds of orgasms, how a woman can experience them in the book "Orgasm Unleashed," your guide to pleasure, healing and power. You can find in the section the PDF version of this book. You can find the link, and I really recommend you to get the paperback version so you can make some notes, make some highlights. And also if you think that somebody in your life, either a man or a woman or teenagers, this will be amazing. Imagine a 12 or 13 year old gets this book. As she's starting her sexual explorations with herself, going into puberty and getting this book in order to, from the start become empowered and become healthy in her sexuality. I received a similar book from my parents when I was getting into puberty. And I'm so grateful for that because that really influenced how I grew up sexually. And this is also something you can buy for a 60, or 70 or 80 year old, something you can buy to a friend, something that you can really look at how you can empower other people sexually by getting them this book. Obviously there's also the kindle version on Amazon and the links are later in the section. Now, forget about all these kinds of orgasms. As I mentioned in the first video in this series. Don't get attached to her having this kind of orgasm or that kind of orgasm, don't count the orgasms. Don't put pressure on her to orgasm. This is just as a kind of like theoretical background and instead focus on connection, focus on sensation, focus on exploration, focus on communication. So being able to ask her for direction, to ask her for feedback. So it's both your communication skills and hers really play, okay? And if she has some kinds of orgasms lately, check in, ask her, how did you feel? What did you feel? When did you feel? If she feels like sharing, okay? Sometimes she might have an orgasm. Well, just no orgasm, just an experience and wouldn't feel like sharing, okay? So I know that I was a little bit too attached to this technicality, and it's really important that you don't focus on this too much. So what are your three takeaways from this video and generally from this video series about female orgasm? So in awakening female pleasure, there's a Facebook group that you've been invited to. You can find it in the welcome section. And it's really important that you share some of your takeaways because by sharing your takeaways, first of all, you are able to better understand what you even got from this, okay? What's your aha moments, what's your insights, okay? It's much better to retain and integrate what you've learned and also you're serving other people by sharing your insights. And as you look in the group maybe we'll see other people's insights and you'll go like, oh wow, I totally missed that thing. It's like, I'm so happy that I've read what another person has said. There might be some women also in the group and they might have totally different insights as well. So this is really what makes this program work for you in deeper ways when you're not just watching it passively but you're also interacting with other people in the community, other people that have watched this program and maybe attended my workshops and you can connect. And maybe later you might even hook up with some people in your local area and exchange an awakening session. So I'm very happy to share this with you and see you in the next video. How to know what she really wants. So in this program, you will learn how to pleasure a woman, how to read the subtle signs. We will go into principles. We'll go to techniques. This is all really important. But the first thing that you need to know, is to, (drum rolling), drum roll, ask her. And I know that this might sound a little bit simplistic, or it's like, okay, what's the news? But actually asking her is something that I haven't done in the past, or I've done very little or not enough, and this is something that I discovered after many years that I can just ask women what they want? How they want to be touched? How they want to be held? How they want to be made love to? And basically, I've built a persona and a career around feeling what women want. But all I had to do was to ask. And that's big. That's has been a really big revelation for me, and sometimes it's an ongoing revelation for me. So again, in this program, we will learn the principles and the techniques and the erogenous points and the massage, and different kinds of touch and all of this stuff. But it's really important that you keep asking. Asking, asking, asking, getting feedback. Communication is such an important part of lovemaking, of relationship and genuinely of life. So tell me what you want, what you really want. This is what do you need to ask her? So ask her to tell you exactly how she wants to be touched. And it needs to be really specific. Okay. So what's the pressure? What's the speed? What's the intensity? What to do before? What to do after? And yeah, sometimes, maybe at least in the beginning of your new sexual exploration, or beginning with a new partner, or rekindling your sex life with an existing partner that you've been with for a while. Maybe you need to rediscover all of these things and really to ask her to tell you exactly what she wants. You can ask her, sometimes some women would be timid, so they wouldn't actually ask, sorry, tell you what to do. So you need to ask her like this? Is this good? Is this nice? Are you enjoying this in this way? This pressure, this speed, this intensity, this place, this kind of touch. Okay? And also you can ask her, how can it be even better? So let's say you're doing something and it's nice, it's good, and maybe she feels that if you just do something different or very often stop doing something, or you're doing it a bit less, it would be even different. Ask her to show you. And showing you, sometimes some women would not be able or feel comfortable to say something, but they will be able to do it. So ask her to show you on her body. And also, with her hands to touch herself in the way that she wants you to touch her. Have her place your hand on her body and move it like she wants you to move it. And sometimes you need a few tries in order to get it. I have worked privately with couples and I was directing the men on how to touch the woman. And sometimes I had to do basically the basic thing of placing the hand on the body over and over and over again, until the men did it in a way which was soft, and conscious, and connected to her body. So yeah, you might need to do this a few times. So keep asking her for feedback. Ask her to touch you in the way that she wants to be touched. 'Cause maybe if she's taking your hand and putting it on her body, maybe you're still not getting it. So having her touch your body and maybe it's not touching, maybe you don't have a vagina, and she wants you to touch her vagina in a certain way, but maybe she can show it on your balls, which are very sensitive. Okay. Maybe she can show it on your hand. 'Cause the hand is extremely sensitive. The palm is extremely sensitive. So ask her to touch you in a way that she wants to be touched. Another things to ask, or the way to ask is when you're trying something new. So in this program, there might be some new things, new techniques, new ways of connecting. It's not just touching. There's different ways of connection that we're exploring. So whenever you're trying something new, you can ask again, is this good? Are you enjoying this? How can this be even better? Frishy okay? Speed okay? And so on. Ask if she's not responding. So if you're doing something, and for a few minutes, she's not breathing so much, she's not making so much sounds, just ask her, "Darling how are?" It's like, "Are you okay? "How are you feeling?" How are you feeling by the way? It's such a simple and it's such a profound question. Just asking somebody how do they feel is showing that you care, showing that you're interested, allows you the opportunity to to see and feel and hear how they are. Okay. So, how are you feeling? And if she's not responding, specifically, see how she's doing. Ask her occasionally. Okay. Even if she's making some sounds, and things are going and she's smiling, and so on, still occasionally, you can ask. Especially in the age of me too, it's not just about a lack of consent. It's a lack of connection because men watch porn and they think that they know how to touch a woman. By the way, women watch porn and they think that that they're supposed to like something, or they're supposed to touch him in a certain way, which is not true. Okay. So just occasionally. Occasionally means throughout a sexual experience, foreplay, or generally your relationship. Even outside of sex. 'Cause in sex, sometimes you don't want to kind of like spoil the moment. So just outside of sex, afterwards or when you're having lunch or dinner just ask her, it's like, how's our sex life. How can it be even better? How would you like me to touch you? And (chuckling) another thing to remember is just don't ask too often, and this is what to do. This is sometimes confusing and paradoxical, don't expect to get it right. Also sometimes some women tell me that some men, again, sometimes ask too often. They just want them to touch them they just want the men to touch them and not to ask them all the time. So, find the balance. Generally, if things are working, you don't need to ask too much, and during this program, you will get some ways to read her body. Notice that she's breathing, notice that her body is moving, notice that maybe she's making some sounds. She's not just there just frozen. And I would say if you are not used to asking her, on the side of asking more often, and then gradually ask less. And also ask for her feedback. Ask her, okay darling, would you like me to ask a bit less and see how that goes. So what are your three takeaways from this video? Please share that in the group. Narrator: The Three Minute Game. This is a really nice game practice exercise that you can share with your partner as part of asking her what you want and improving communications between you. The purpose of this game is really to learn how to ask for what you want and how she can ask for what you want and this is another one of these exercises in the training that isn't just meant for you to give to her but it's also allowing you to receive so that you at Awakening Female Pleasure isn't just about women's pleasure, but generally about awakening pleasure for both partners. The second purpose of this is to learn how to give them what they want because sometimes I hear this from women, you know, I tell him, I tell him what I want, I tell him how I want him to touch me but he doesn't do it. So this is really important that we learn both to express what we want in a really clear language and by the way, sometimes women though are not clear enough and also for you to really have a chance to listen, to hear, to follow, to get feedback and to really give them what they want. This Three Minute Game is based on the wheel of consent which is a really beautiful theory and practice that is developed by Betty Martin following other people's work as well. I learned specifically from Betty Martin and from other professionals called Matthias Schwenteck and Robyn Dalzen and I really recommend you to check their work as well, this is just a brief summary of their work. The wheel of consent clarifies basically two things, it clarifies who's doing the action and it clarifies who it's for. So many times people think that they are giving something to another person, giving some service, doing something for another person but actually the other person is feeling used even or the feeling that what they're receiving is not working for them, that's not actually what they wanted. So it's really important to be clear about are you doing it for yourself or are you doing it for another person. Even, for example, one of the best examples is giving a hug so many times, especially in spiritual and New Age communities, you know, one person would come to another person that says, you know, I would like to give you a hug and the receiving party sometimes instead of receiving a hug, the person who made the request was actually kind of like using them for touch. So in this case it's much better to say, I would like us to hug or I would like to be hugged rather than to pretend that you would want to hug. And this is something that I've done myself that, you know, sometimes I did things and in order to hide my vulnerability and my neediness, I framed it as if I was doing it for another person so it's really important that we are clear about who's doing the action and who it's for. And that leads us to the issue of dynamics in the wheel of consent. So there's basically two dynamics of touch and we're specifically talking about touch and later we can also expand it into other interactions but touch is the easiest way to look at this. And the first dynamic is serving and accepting or accepting you can also say that it's being served. And one of the easiest examples related to this program is for example, giving a massage to your partner. So when you're giving a massage to your partner, you are serving her, you are touching her for her pleasure, for her healing, for her empowerment so the direction of the touch, it's towards her and it's the direction of the gift, who's being gifted is her as well, okay? So you're serving and she is accepting your service, she's accepting your gift and it's really important when you're serving to make sure that you are only serving and you might you might enjoy it as well but you're not doing it for yourself which leads us to the second dynamic and the second dynamic is taking and allowing which means, for example that you can be touching your partners body but you're not touching your partner's body for her pleasure, you're touching her body in order to enjoy her body so you're taking pleasure from her body and she is allowing you to take pleasure from from her body. And this, if done with consent is beautiful because it allows us to experience the joy of either taking something for our own which is totally okay, some people and I know, I've done this in the past, they think that we're only supposed to serve other people, we're only supposed to do something for others but actually you're taking all the time, you know, so if you're working you're taking money for a service that you are offering, for example. So this is not just dynamics in touch, this is also dynamics in life. And it's not just men who are taking from women, if you're making love with a woman sometimes I tell her, you know, use my body for your pleasure, touch me for your pleasure and if you're riding me, enjoy my cock inside you and do it for you, don't try to pleasure me when you're doing this so I'm allowing her to take pleasure from my body. And it can be, you know, it doesn't have to be penetration, it can be, you know, a woman can be touching my hairy chest, for example, and really enjoying my hairy chest or I don't know, enjoying my bald head or enjoying whatever. So, this is important to understand that both dynamics are beautiful as long as they're in consent and they are not in shadow. So, for example, if you are offering a Yoni massage to somebody or a vaginal to somebody and you're offering that because she's hot and you want to touch a naked body so in that case you're not serving but you're taking, okay? You're taking pleasure and this is sometime in relationship interactions and sexual interactions. Sometimes even men think that they are serving the woman, they think that they're doing something for her but because they haven't asked for consent and because they're not asking for feedback, the women are actually feeling that the men are taking from them. So there's a there's a really unfortunate dynamic there that one person thinks that they are doing something for another person, and the other person is feeling used, this is something that I hear a lot. This is a really nice diagram of the wheel of consent so it clarifies and again, I'm a geek and I really like graphs and diagrams because it really gives us so many information in such a condensed form. So you can see there's two directions, so at the top you're doing and at the bottom they are doing so this relates to who's doing the action. And if you look at the left, the left side is giving a gift, okay? The gift it is for them and on the right side receiving a gift so the gift is for you. So again, who's doing the action and who is receiving the gift, who's giving and receiving the gift. Going again to the easiest way to look at that is the upper left quadrant serve, okay? So serving actually you're not even initiating serving, okay? So you might offer something for for your partner but actually your partner would ask you, will you massage me? Okay? Will you massage me for my own pleasure? Will you massage me for my own benefit? If you look at the lower right quadrant the accepting so the person who is accepting actually can ask, okay? Will you serve me? So you can answer yes, I will serve you and this is an action that you totally do for the benefit of of another. If this is done without consent, outside of the line of consent and you see outside the wheel of consent or the circle of consent, it goes to the shadow side so the shadow side the do-gooder, okay? So the person who's just focusing on on doing good for other people without accepting, okay? And without taking from another person. It goes into martyrdom, it's going to slavery so rescue dynamics are very prevalent again in, you know, spiritual in New Age communities but also I see this with women that I work with, sometimes they take care of the kids, they take care of the household, they care of their husbands, sometimes they even have a job in the same time. Or sometimes with men that were kind of like nice guys and they feel that they have to please women and they have to satisfy everyone which is a way for them to receive love and to receive recognition and to belong and to connect so really look at serving in a healthy way and not serving too much so you have to explore and experience all parts of the of the will. Accepting, we touched on that briefly. So the person who wants to be served asks, you know, will you do this for me? You know, it can be William massage my back? Will you do the shopping for me? Will take care of the kids? Whatever that is and so you'll benefit from the action of others and the shadow side of accepting is freeloader is feeling privileged, okay? And it says slavery in this one, it's actually a mistake but the next one entitled, it's a feeling of entitlement, okay? So the people that always feel that other people should do things for them, okay? Going to the upper right quadrant, the taking quadrant so this is an action to benefit yourself. So you can ask your partner, for example, may I and this is what the format of the taking question is, may I let's say for example, touch your body for my pleasure? Touch your hands for my pleasure? And in the game and we're gonna go into the game in more detail in a moment, it can be any part of the body so you can touch somebody's hair, you know, may I touch your hair, you know, for me, for my pleasure. And the shadow part of that is the perpetrator, stealing groping, assault, rape and war which means outside of the will of consent, it's taking without consent which starts to be this negative expressions like rape and sexual abuse and assault and groping and so on. In the allowing quadrant, the bottom left quadrant, so if the taker is asking you may I, if this is something that you wanna allow them so you say, yes, you may. So for example, for the men listening to this, if your woman says, you know, can I touch your muscles and enjoy your muscles for my pleasure and if this feels right for you, you can say yes, you may. So this is allowing others to act as they want and allowing them you can also say access to your body if we're talking about touch. The shadow side of allowing is to tolerate and to endure, to be a doormat, to be a pushover and if it gets more extreme is to be a victim and to be passive and you can see that if the taker which is outside of consent become stealing, groping, assault, rape, the allower which is not in consent doesn't give their consent going to the shadow side actually becomes a victim. So this is again, a very brief description of the wheel of consent, let's see this in action. So how we see this in action is in the Three Minute Game and a Three Minute Game is a way for us to play with, to experience all four quadrants of the wheel of consent and the two dynamics of touch. So the first question of the Three Minute Game is, and this is something that you can say, that you can ask your partner, how do you want me to touch you? And it's very important that when you say, when you ask her, how do you want me to touch you, she actually tells you how she really wants you to touch her because many women would go into a pleasing dynamic so she would say something like, just do whatever you feel like or they would expect you to know what's good for them, okay? Just do what you usually do or you know I trust you, you know, you know I trust you to touch me. This is not the purpose of this exercise, the purpose of this exercise is that they have to tell you in minute details how they want you to touch them, where they want you to touch them specifically and in what way, in what pressure, in what speed, in what intensity, in what kind of touch, in what body part, with which of your body parts, okay? So maybe she wants you to touch her with your hand, maybe she wants you to touch her with your face or maybe she wants you to touch her with your thighs, okay? So it's really important that your partner asks in very clear ways how she wants to be touched and the same thing for the women listening to this, it's very important that your partner is very clear and you don't just let them get away with being vague, okay? It's very important that when you touch them, you touch them exactly according to their request and you don't do anything else. Even if you are an amazing lover, an amazing body worker, energy worker and whatever and you've been together for 10 years and you know exactly what she likes or they like, don't do anything apart from what they've asked. And by the way, there's a related exercise for this which you touch them in 10 minutes spots, let's say. Sorry, not 10 minutes, 10 seconds, okay? So they say please do this for me and you do this to them for 10 seconds and if you wanna go, you know, 10 seconds is a really good time because they have to keep giving you the feedback and the requests of how they want to be touched. So maybe in the beginning they don't want to be touched at all and they just want you to sit next to them and to just hold space for them and maybe then they just want you to put a hand on their back, on their shoulder, let's say if they're lying down. And then you just do that for 10 seconds and then you remove your hand and then you ask, okay, so now what would you like? And they constantly need to make requests so they can say the same thing, you can say please repeat that or they can ask for something different, okay? So this is a very related exercise that you can also do. In the Three Minute Game we're doing whatever they ask us for three minutes, I would actually suggest you to play both of them. So you do that for three minutes and then the next question is, how do you want to touch me? So again, for the men listening to this, you ask your female partner how she wants to touch you and it's very important that when she touches you, she doesn't do this in order to please you, in order to pleasure you, in order to do something for you, in order to satisfy you. She doesn't touch you in the way that she knows that she wants to be touched, she first of all tells you and then actually touches you in the way that she wants to enjoy you. And this is something that is very important because I know that when I've done that, because I'm a body worker, because I'm a healer, because as a lover I was so focused on doing things for women instead of enjoying myself with their consent so many times I defaulted to service, okay? When I started touch somebody I defaulted to service and this is something which might happen to you as well and might happen to your partner as well so it's very important that, for example, if you feel that your partner is touching you in order to please you or to pleasure you and it's supposed to be for them, you can reflect that to them. So again, once you're clear about how they want to touch you, you do that for three minutes and afterwards you switch. It's really important that you switch because when you learn all of the four sides of the wheel of consent you get better in all of the others. So if you are only serving and your partner is only accepting this is only one kind of dynamic but until you know how to take you would not know how to serve, okay? And it's really important, for example, in taking it's also important to allow and as a man it's so relieving for me, it's so relaxing for me that I don't need to pleasure somebody, I don't need to serve somebody and I can just touch her for my own pleasure. It's so nice for me that when I'm with a woman I don't need to explain to her what to do, I can give her access to my body and she can just enjoy my body as long as it's in consent so consent is very important. So when you hear a request, you need to feel into, is this something that you are okay with. So again, for the women watching this, for the couples watching this, you don't just go with whatever your partner asks you, this is really important that you take a few seconds, you tune in and if you don't get a full yes for what they asked you, whatever that was, you say no, thank you. Thank you for asking, I'm not comfortable with this in this moment, you don't have to explain, you don't have to tell a story, you don't have to do anything so you can say no is a full answer and you can say, yeah, obviously if okay, go ahead but if not okay say no or suggest an alternative. So you can say, no I don't want you to put your fingers inside me right now and enjoy the feeling of my wet pussy but if you want you can enjoy my thighs, okay? And really this is something for your partner to enjoy. And sometimes some people would not feel okay with anything so the only thing that it will be okay with, for example, is his eye gazing or breathing together without any touch at all, okay? So sometimes it's just go back to basics and it's really important that you respect your know, you respect your boundaries, you respect whatever it is that you're not feeling okay with and you don't go beyond that, okay? So this is something which is so important and not just in the program and not just in your sex life, but generally in your life. So if you're chatting with a friend and your friend is taking a lot of time to talk about himself and you're getting a little bit tired of that, and they keep doing this and they keep doing this and you feel like no, you have something that you wanna do that is important for you, you wanna go somewhere, you wanna work on your mission, on your art or just rest or whatever that is, is that you're really clear in expressing your boundaries. And it might be even a good friend but maybe after a while it's like you're not enjoying that so why go with something that you're not enjoying so don't try to please people. So again, both for the men, also for the women listening to this. Also, obviously for same sex couples, just be true to what it is that you're feeling okay with. And by the way, if somebody also asked you to do something for them, okay? It's not just making your body available, you know, it's like if somebody is asking you for a massage, don't give a massage, if somebody asks you to give you a massage and you don't feel like receiving a massage, say no, okay? If they want to serve you and you don't wanna be served, say no. If they want to touch you and you don't wanna be touched, say no. And going back to the program, especially for the men doing this, it happens so often that because we are not allowed and we're not taught how to take we're actually taking when we're serving, okay? So it's important that specifically in this program, you do this for her and you keep the intention on pleasuring her, healing her and massaging her, touching her for her pleasure and her empowerment and this is why it's important that you play this game because then you can allow yourself to express all of the things the ways that you want to be touched and the way that you want to touch her for your benefit, for your pleasure. So there's a few benefits to the three minute game. You develop the confidence and the self-love to express your needs. And again, this is something that I hear from so many people, specifically the women that I work with, that they sometimes even know what they want but they don't feel that they're able to express this, you know, it's like they're feeling unworthy to ask for what they want and obviously, it's not just in sex, it's not just in relationships, it's generally in life as well. So going to your boss and asking for a raise when you feel you really deserve that raise and the company has enough money and so on, this is also a way to express your needs and to feel that you're worthy of doing that. The next thing is to even find out what you want and how you want it. So sometimes your partner is willing to help you and to serve you and to touch you how you want but you don't even know how you want because you will never ask that. And again, going back to my sessions, sometimes I do the sessions with women when I'm not using my experience and my skills and my knowledge and so on, I'm just asking them, how would you like me to hold you? How would you like me to touch you? How would you like me to massage you? Which part of your body do you want me to touch? In what way? And sometimes the women get shocked that they don't even know how they want. And same thing with men, I hear this from my female clients, okay? Sorry from my female colleagues, okay? And sometimes, you know, men go for the obvious, you know, touch my cock. Yeah, touch cock is really nice, we feel nice when people touch our cock but maybe we want her to put her hand on our cheeks, okay? Maybe to cup our ears. So once you start this this game, you would be surprised of what people start to ask because sometimes it's even things which are not sexual, are not orgasmic and has nothing to do with pleasure, okay? But it's something that they want to experience. Going on with the benefits, so yeah, you learn how to ask for what you want, okay? You learn how to listen and to follow their requests, very, very important. And this is something that you ask for feedback from your partner when she asked or he asked for what they want, you ask is this good for you? Are you enjoying this? Is this what you asked? Okay, pressure okay, speed okay, the touch okay, how can this be even better? So you make sure that you're really, really serving them if this is the part of the wheel of consent that you are practicing. You improve communications, okay? So how to ask for what you want and how to ask for feedback to make sure that you're actually giving them what they want. And it's also a safe and gradual way to step towards the edge of your comfort zone so some people would have some desires and have some fantasies about how they want to be touched and they feel uncomfortable and shy and self-conscious about asking that. So it's really important game and practice to just make another request and another request and gradually ask for more and more of what you really, really want to receive. So this is something that you can do also during sex so generally the program doesn't deal directly with sex, it deals with everything else apart from sex and in the next program that I'm creating we will deal specifically in sex, it's really important that we separate this because you know, penetration and sex is so much a word on its own and this program, this current program Awakening Female Pleasure we'll learn about so many things that you do outside of sex. But having said that, you can use everything, most things that you learn in this program and you can also do this during sex. So during sex, you can take turns and you can ask your partner in this moment, in this few minutes, in this next few minutes, how would you like me to penetrate you? How would you like me to to fuck you? How would you like me to make love with you? Okay? So take turns serving and accepting which is the first dynamic and taking and allowing. So for example, as I mentioned earlier, I would sometimes invite women to enjoy my cock when they're riding me or even sometimes when they're under me and I can share a little bit of, you know, the next program and say that once I discovered these dynamics, once I discovered that sometimes even both of you can take from each other, you can quote, you know, use each other's body with consent and I have to really emphasize with consent, so as long as you're doing it clearly and with consent and as long as you're not going beyond what you're comfortable with, it's a beautiful interaction because both of you are using the other person for your pleasure. So both of you are in pleasure, both of you are enjoying, both of you hopefully know what it is that you're wanting and you are using the other person for your pleasure so there's much more pleasure rather than trying to figure out what the other person wants, okay? So play this during sex and you can also play this outside of the bedroom, okay? so, you know, you can ask her about, how can I serve you this this evening? You know, how can I serve you this weekend? And you can also use the taking and allowing dynamic, okay? For example, in business, okay? How can you serve the world? Okay? Not just your client, not just for money but really how can you do something that makes a difference to the world? How can you make yourself available for the people to enjoy and also how you can take which is very much related to one of my passions which is conscious business and empowering people to do what they love, express their gifts and help other people and make money from that. So how can you take with consent? Okay? So this is a really beautiful way to see how everything in sexuality also relates to life. So what are your three takeaways from this video, from this presentation, from the three minute game. Please, very much recommended to go to the Facebook group, to join the Facebook group and to share it there. Sharing makes this process more alive for you, more effective for you, it helps you to learn more, it helps you to integrate more and by sharing you serve the other people in the group and you might be able to see some of their sharing so the insights that they got and this will give you a really good reminder, really good insight that you didn't actually get, you didn't actually understand from this presentation and suddenly you're gonna read this there. So do this and I'll see you in the next video. So as you probably understand, this is not just about genital touch, not just about sexuality. The idea about relating to a woman, is that it starts from the first moment that she walks through the door that you walk through the door, from the first moment that you meet. So it's really important to cultivate your attitudes to cultivate your inner space in order to relate with her. And this is honestly what many, many guys miss. So, you know, they always look for the techniques, and I'll be sharing with you a few very, very important techniques, but it's not even techniques I call them reminders or attitudes. So we're going to be exploring with a beautiful model what it looks like, what it feels like, and maybe also what it sounds like to really feel witness and connect with a woman. And the first thing that we're gonna explore now is about standing. So we're not starting immediately from lying down and vaginal massage or whatever, we're starting from how does two people, how do two people relate when they're standing next to each other? How do you look at a woman? How do you talk with a woman? How do you hold a woman? And honestly, I don't even know myself about to shoot a sexy size, how this is going to unfold, okay? Because every woman is different and every woman is different in every minute. So we are exploring something and sharing that with you and showing that to you as a very organic demonstration. This is not... She's not playing, this is not a porn. You know, a movie where she's like, faking anything with it, I'm faking anything. So what I'm sharing with you, what we will be sharing with you is a very organic very honest example of what it looks like for two people to interact. And it's very important for you to understand that women feel and sense everything that you're doing. Even if, sometimes they're not aware of it, they feel how relaxed you are. They feel how you breathing. They feel if you're in your body, they feel how you hold them. And what I'm sharing with you is kind of like the basics, and in some ways it's very the advanced stuff as well. It's not just the basics because what we'll be sharing now will accompany us throughout the program. Some of the techniques, some of the attitudes some of what you will see now I'm gonna be repeating throughout the program. And it's really important that you practice this standing maybe practices a bit dry that you explore and play with it, standing and not just immediately focus on you know, getting your fingers inside her. Okay, so let's see how this looks like. (breathes heavily) So, it feels like we started. And actually I have started already, which is I have started breathing. So the first thing to do really, when you connect with another person is connect with yourself, and I'm making sure that I'm breathing all the time. So it's really, really important to breathe, and my breath brings awareness to her breath. And when she's breathing, she's more in her body. Okay so, just as a reminder. (breathes heavily) So when I'm holding her hand, I'm holding her hand softly and firmly in the same time. And many guys do the mistake of holding a woman as if she's a man, okay, being too rough, too harsh. (breathes heavily) And another thing that I'm doing, that I also recommend is not just doing this eye gazing exercise, but also look at her body, look at her first at her lips, now look at the nose, okay, they're beautiful, cheekbones and ears and hair. So you're not just doing some spiritual eye gazing exercise. So this is a body language cue, it gives the hint. It gives the message that it's not just about the eyes. It's not some new age exercise. Do you enjoy your body being witnessed? I love it. (breathes heavily) And about the breath it doesn't necessarily need to be synchronized. As long as you're breathing, your breath is relaxed. It's okay. And sometimes if you want to synchronize it, that's also okay. As long as you're relaxed in your breath. And also it's like, I'm looking with the eyes but I'm also feeling with the hands, I'm feeling with the body. So I'm bringing my awareness to my heart and also to my cock. And some would say, first to my cock and then to my heart. So a man's energy is rooted it started starting from his cock. And it's really important to bring your awareness there because it's like a power station that you start building the energy there. And then the energy goes to the heart and goes to the crown, and it's connected with the other person. So what a woman would do is exactly the opposite where she would bring the awareness to her heart. And then from her heart it will go down to her yoni, to her vagina. (breathes heavily) So again, it's not so much about the technique, it's about your attitude and also what you're doing internally. (breathes heavily) (bird chirping) So just to share more about that, men again do the mistake of touching women as if they were men and women do the same mistake. They touch men as if they were women. So, men, and again this is based on me talking with many, many, many women who are friends and lovers and clients. So men always touch women too early, too fast, too strong, and they're doing too much. Okay? They are kissing them too early and too strong, touching the breasts too early and usually too strong, touching the yonis, too early again, same thing too early, too strong and wanting to penetrate them too early, too strong. And many women would not tell you that. So they just go along with things. You need to create so much anticipation and attraction that the woman is yearning for you to touch her. And sometimes she's even taking action and even asking you or putting her hands on you or even kissing you. Okay, or asking you to penetrate her, later you know, not covered so much in this program, but this is the most beautiful situation to be in. So the reminder is that as a man, your arousal, your energy builds from your cock, from your genitals, and then towards the rest of your body. For a woman is exactly the opposite. So a woman's arousal and energy starts from her specifically from her chest and her breasts, down to her yoni, down to her vagina. So you need to, first of all, build the arousal here. And also you would say not exactly in the mind but have a connection before you go to the physical. Okay, so women get turned on by many, many things and not just by how you move your fingers or how hard you're penetrating them. So it's really important to... That's what I'm doing all this already for a few minutes, establishing connection, you know, breathing together, looking at her body, showing appreciation, expressing appreciation. And then in the moment when I'll start touching, I'm not even gonna touch the breast first, I'm gonna show you how to hug and to hold. And then later I'm going to be bringing some awareness to the chest, some awareness, maybe to the breast let's see, some awareness around the hips without touching the ass and then touching the ass, and in this exercise, we're not gonna have kind of like internal genital stimulation or anything but we might hint on that area. So this is really important for you to remember women are aroused from up, downwards, from the outside, inwards, and from soft to a little bit more intense. Okay so always start softer, always wait before you do something. Always err on the side of waiting a little bit. Always err on the side of going softer and slower. And if you think you're going slower, go even slower and you will see what the effect is on the woman and what it creates between you. Does that feel right for you? Does that make sense for you as a woman? Yes. (breathes heavily) Be invited. Hmm yeah. Yeah be invited. (breathes heavily) So, I'm not just touching her chest and by the way I'm touching her chest I'm not touching her breasts. Okay so I have my hand on her upper chest with my fingers just touching the lower part of her neck, of her throat. So I'm not just touching I'm also feeling, okay? And I'm touching with a very, very soft hand. So it's important for you to soften your hands so much that you actually feeling with your hand. And again, that's what I'm hearing from women about what guys do. It's like they touch, but they don't feel. So it's important that you are relaxing your hand enough, that when you place your hand, it feels like I'm feeling all of the contours of the fabric and of the skin and of the bones underneath because I'm touching in a very, very relaxed way. So, so placing my hand very softly, not pushing her, and you can do this and you can hold this for a few minutes, either with eye gazing, without eye gazing, both of them are okay you know. So yeah, if you are in some kind of energy movement, pleasure, orgasmic experience, you can also stay there. And when you wanna connect with me through the eyes, you can do that. And obviously we established, you know, boundaries and stuff and we taking it for granted that you are okay with, that you both of you and your partner are okay with touching each other, and later we're gonna be talking about establishing specific boundaries around, boundaries and the requests and invitation for more intimate touch. (breathes heavily) Another kind of like subtle thing that I'm doing is I'm just very, very lightly caressing. So I'm just with my thumb just very, very lightly caressing the skin. And again, it's not so much a technique, it's a reminder for how to touch and how to relate. So I'm either way stable, and there's one small thing that I'm doing. I'm not doing five things in the same time. And I'm starting to build a touch I'm starting to build arousal. And on a side note, I'm also really enjoying the fabric and the feeling of her skin on my thumb. (breathes heavily) Yeah. Yeah. Okay. (both breathing heavily) So kind of like the basic position, the basic holding position that I like and that I recommend is to hold a woman in her lower back. Okay. Sometimes called the small of her back. So, this gives a certain kind of stability and it's also a little bit more personal, romantic and maybe even sensual than holding somebody in the back of their heart. Okay? So a more socially acceptable hug would be more in the back of the heart, but once you go to the lower back, it already feels a little bit more sensual, more personal. Okay? Because, I'm not gonna touch her ass, right now, but her ass is just underneath my hands, below my hands. So, already holding her here is giving a signal, and what I like to say, hinting. Also known sometimes as teasing, but slightly different. So hinting means, I know that your ass is just here, beneath my hands, and I'm not going there yet. Okay? So I'm just holding you here. And the same thing with how I was touching her chest before, I wasn't touching her breasts, but I was close enough to hint that that might be coming soon. And the way that I'm holding is, how do you say, 50% between strong and soft. Okay. So it's strong enough that I'm providing a structure, I'm providing a pole, I'm providing stability. Okay? So, you know if we were dancing and I was to dip her. Yeah, more. Yeah. Okay, so, it's a strong enough hold that I can hold her if I need to hold her. So this thing about the hinting is very important because men go for it and go directly to the goal. Okay? And women are indirect, women are circular. So, I'm holding her in a way that hints on where I might go next. You know, I might put my hand here, so it's close enough to her breasts, to be personal, to be sensual. Okay? But I'm still, I'm not grabbing her. Same thing with kissing. When you're kissing, you know, you can build it up as well, before you insert your tongue, you know, all the way in. And what you might notice that I've been doing for a few minutes also, is that I started to create some kind of movement. So, I'm holding her kind of like half firm, half soft, but strong enough to, maybe it's more on the firm side, would you say? It's like, it's more on the, okay. So it's more on the firm side. I'm not breaking her bones. Okay? But still it's relatively firm. And I've been creating a side-to-side movement. And this kind of side-to-side movement, it's called rocking. So rocking from side to side or creating a rhythm. So creating a rhythm, think about how you put babies to sleep, okay? You rock them in the baby crib, you rock them on your arms. And this is something that physiologically is very, very relaxing. And the idea with arousal, that arousal doesn't just come from you doing things, it comes from relaxation. So, I am creating something which is relaxing, and from this relaxation, she can start to be aroused. Another thing that it starts to do, it's like, it creates very, very gentle movement. So this gentle movement, because I'm slightly moving her body, then it creates space for her body to move, for her head to move so beautiful as it does, you know? So there's a bit of undulation in her body because I'm moving her side to side. (both breathing heavily) So there's another thing that I'm doing, I keep breathing and I said that I'm breathing, and I'm probably gonna repeat it a lot, a lot of times throughout the program. And, I'm also bringing awareness to my body. So you can call it, you know, the attitude, it's not exactly a technique, which is I am hugging her with all of my body. So I'm aware of her breath on my skin, I'm aware of how her skin, her back feels in my hand, I'm aware of her hand and how it touches my hand, this hand and how it's touching my shoulder, I'm feeling her chest, I'm feeling her belly. My genitals are sometimes gently touching, you know, her genitals. And my upper, let's say my hip here, is touching her, what is it? Upper thigh? (both laughing) Don't ask me for words right now. (murmurs) So my upper thigh is touching her upper thigh, and it feels amazing for me to feel her upper thigh. Okay? Do you feel like our upper thighs, Meet. is touching as well? Meeting, thank you. Not just touching, but meeting. So there's a meeting of the body. So don't just be focused on what you're doing, bring awareness to the whole body. And when you bring awareness to your whole body, you call her awareness into her body as well. Because women, and especially Western women and modern women, are very much in their head. Okay? Men as well, everybody's too much in their head. So by you going into your body, you're calling her into her body. (both breathing heavily) And, you can start gently caressing. So, what I'll be doing with my hands sometimes, it's kind of like this, you know? So just very gently kind of like feeling the skin, feeling the flesh, very, very gently. And again, it creates a certain of gradual approach to the touch. So you're not going from hugging and kissing directly to whatever, nipple stimulation and genital stimulation. So I'm already starting to touch her body. And there's another aspect to attitude which is, I have something stable going on and I have something, I'll just say not stable, moving dynamic going on as well. So, I'm holding her quite firmly and I'm also moving. I'm holding one hand and I'm moving the other hand. So, this combination again, creates a range, so you're not just doing one thing and I'm just doing you can say two things. Okay? There's a movement and there's a stability. So, with the hands again, the basic one you can say is, you know, holding the lower back. And if I'm holding her with two hands, there's one hand in the lower back and you can say, there's one hand in the middle of the chest, the back of the chest. So then there's again a structure, and there's stability. So, I'm starting from being stable in the moment I start moving my hands as well. But you can say this is another kind of like very basic position you can always go to. From here, you can travel to the neck as well. Later we can travel down to her a beautiful bum. So there's, ways to go from here. I can enjoy her waist from here. And, oh, let's say there's two things that are going on. One of them is doing this for the purposes of pleasuring here and giving her something, and another thing that we're doing, is also enjoying her. So, as long as enjoying her is connected to her and it's not just taking from her, regardless of what she feels and what she wants, it's actually beautiful. And tell me if you enjoyed it. I'm touching your waist here and I'm enjoying your waist. Is that pleasurable as well? It feels like I'm seen and I'm held and I'm touched. But not because of me being an object, but because I'm really, yeah, just that you love my body. I love your body. (both chuckle) So another way to look at this dynamic is, you can call it a sensual hug as well and you can also call it, you know, a sensual dance. And many people are afraid of dance not knowing the moves and techniques and the steps, but dance is really, really simple. Or it can be really, really simple if you just start from this. So I have, my feet are between her feet, we are standing quite close to each other. And, not exactly all my body is next to her, but I'm kind of like, what is it half way? Okay. So if my belly button is here and her hips are here, so it's not so much this. This is also okay, there's no problem with that. I know this kind of like feels for me like I'm giving some touch, some pressure. Pressure sounds pressuring, but, I'm giving some pressure here with my hipbone on her lower belly and genital area. Pubic bone. Depends. Pubic bone, yeah, thank you. Okay. Depends what's your height difference. Obviously here we have an interesting height difference. So, but even with a shorter woman, I might do that as well. And again, a side note about that as well, is that I'm providing a strong structure specifically because I'm shorter. Okay? So because I'm feeling stable enough, she can trust me first of all with her body and her weight, and then with her pleasure and her genitals and later with her love and with her heart. Okay? So, I'm showing up as somebody who stable but also soft and sensitive enough to touch and to feel where she's at. Does that make sense (murmurs)? Yes. You need anything to add to that or? Maybe with the heart trusting with my, with you with the heart, and then the genitals. The opposite right? Yeah, okay. So, that's a good reminder. So, trusting with the weight and then trusting with the heart and trusting with the genitals and sex as well. Okay, thank you for that. So, going back to the position. One of my foot is between her feet. Okay? This is very similar to a dance. Okay? This will be the dance, you know, aspect of this. That's something actually to explore by the way, holding the hands. Because the hands are very sensual, very erogenous. So we started from holding the hands and sometimes you can still go to holding the hands or doing something with the hands. And for now let's, I'll touch you with both of my hands. I'm creating this constant movement, so this is the aspect of rhythm, creating rhythm. I'm constantly having at least one hand holding her tightly. So, I'm constantly having a structure. That the message is, you are in my arms, you're safe in my arms. (both breathing heavily) I'm keep breathing into my belly. (both breathing heavily) And then what you can do is, you can start exploring the skin, can start exploring touching. And the woman, you know, can be receptive and passive, and she can also reciprocate, so both of us, you can touch each other. It's not that the woman is just supposed to be a starfish and be totally passive. The main thing for the woman and for the women watching is, at least sometimes in some parts of the interaction, make sure that you are relaxed enough and not doing anything so you can really receive. And the same thing for the men, sometimes you can let your woman, even in a sensual hug like this, touch you and caress you, and you can just pause and just feel the woman's hands on you. (both breathing heavily) So the next thing that we gonna be looking at, is another aspect of hinting. So with hinting, I'm starting to move my hands around her body. So again, one hand, you know, right now feeling or holding the back of her heart, and with the other hand, I'm starting to explore. And when I'm exploring, I'm going at the sides of her torso close to her breast, but I'm not touching her breasts yet. So again, this is what I mean by hinting or teasing. It means I know your breasts are here and I have enough time. And if you doing it for awhile, her breast would start to fill up with a feeling of like, I wanna be touched. Okay? It's like please touch me, come on, you know I'm here. Like, why aren't you touch me? And the same thing with her ass, it's like, this is kind of the ass, but not really, 'cause I'm going on the side. Okay? So I'm just hinting rather than, just gonna show you what not to do. It's like just hugging somebody and just going like this. Again, it's not bad, and sometimes in some situations both of you are really aroused, the energy is there, that's great. But especially if you wanna build it really, well, if you wanna really create arousal and pleasure and connection, make sure that you go gradual, that you tease, that you hint. And then you can go towards those more sensitive and erogenous zones. With the ass, it's really important, you know, not just to go directly for the ass, but I'm starting first from the tailbone. And this is by the way a very erogenous zone for both women and men. Okay. So I'm putting my hand here, I'm basically hinting, I know your ass is here, I have time. And I'm also creating structure and support from here. It's like I'm holding her from here. (both breathing heavily) The neck is also a very erogenous zone to touch. The neck and the jaw hold a lot of tension for women. And when I'm now touching the cheeks and the mouth and the lips, it's kind of like hinting on kissing. So before you kissing, you start from gentle and then you go you can go more harder, faster. But first you start with with this soft. (both breathing heavily) Okay. So, you can go like even closer. (both breathing heavily) And if you're noticing some things that I'm doing that I'm not describing, feel free to express that as well. So again, holding tight with one hand, the other hand is exploring. Hinting of the erogenous zones. Creating movement. Creating rhythm. Not doing too much in the same time. (both breathing heavily) And this is really the basics of touch, the basics of relating that we're gonna keep going back to later. You have any reflection of anything that I'm? I want you to touch me under my bum, you haven't been there. Here? Okay, thank you. So that's another hinting thing. So this beautiful line under the bum, under the ass cheeks. Okay? So it's actually a very, very arousing line, because it's connected. If I'm pulling it to the side, it's actually pulling on her labia on the lips of her yoni. Okay. And even without pulling, it's like, it's still a very, very sensual area. And again, hinting on her ass. (both breathing heavily) And also if I'm pulling this skin here and kind of like separating the ass cheeks, I'm pulling it and I'm holding. (both breathing heavily) I feel very supported and I feel like melting. (both breathing heavily) Another thing, another, you can say attitude or reminder is that, even though I'm holding her firmly, I'm not stopping her movement, so her body starts to undulate. So when her body starts to undulate, with my hand, I'm supporting that movement. So I'm meeting her where she is, (clears throat) I'm meeting her where she is, and with my whole body it's like, I'm supporting that movement. (both breathing heavily) So I'll be moving my head out of the way, so her head can undulate. (both breathing heavily) And I'm just touching her back in the way that meets the movement which is already there. So what she might feel is, is like wow he's really feeling me, and he's really supporting me where I'm at. Rather than going like, "Oh no, I want us to do something different." So regardless of the plans that you have, always feel, always here, where the woman is at, meet her there, and from there you can take her places. But many guys and myself included in the past, I (indistinct) on the side of it's like, "I know the direction," you know, "I'm holding you, I'm guiding you," or you know, it's like, "Do what I tell you." And now it's more like, "Oh, let me feel where you're at and meet you, and from there, I'll take you places." So I don't know who started the circular movement, I think it was you, but suddenly it's like, "Okay, there's a circular movement." Okay. So that's what we're doing now, there's a circular movement. And you can kind of like go together as well. It's the permission for me to be supportive in whatever movement that my body just moves and I let it. Beautiful. And also what she's doing now, so suddenly she's giving me access. So suddenly it's like, "Oh, I have access here." So I can caress, and I can just go on the line on the middle of the chest, before going to her breasts. So Just going up and down this line, even going possible to go the way up. Very, very, light, very, very light touch. Tips of the fingers. So there's five kinds of touch we gonna get to this later. But for now, just think about it as a very airy light touch tips of the fingers going up and down. And again, I can be hinting. So this is also another way to look at it as foreplay. Okay? So we standing and before we get to bed, it's like we already touching each other, and I'm building it, and building it, and building it and going around her breast, and around breast, and around her breast. And then building the feeling in the nipple that the nipple wants to be touched. Guys remember breasts are not only nipples, the breast basically starts from here, start from the shoulder. Okay? And it goes to the side as well. And another thing that I'm doing that I mentioned earlier, is that I'm creating arousal, touch, sensation, first up before going down. Okay? And also here, there's a bit of an anchor. Okay? So I'm just holding her here. Okay? So her body can move as it wants to move. So in a moment I'm going to turn you around. I just wanna hear how you feel in this moment, if you have, if you can find words? Flowy, supported, just orgasmic. (both chuckle) (both breathing heavily) (both moaning) So whenever you do anything, whenever you change anything, whatever you go into a new situation, whatever you touch a new body part that you haven't touched before, whenever you're going to a new position, the first thing that you do is pause. So before you start adding more, doing more, trying more you pause and by the way, pausing right now, we still moving but it's a very, very, I don't know if automatic is the right word but it's like, we're hardly doing anything. Natural. Natural, thank you. Okay, so I turn her around and I'm letting her in myself relax and feel what's going on before I start doing stuff, okay? So that's something we're gonna go back to again and again, pause whenever there's any, thing that is changing or happening you can pause and you can feel what's going on instead of doing more. I've just positioned myself so again, my hipbone is between her ass cheeks. Hmm. Which is again, another form of hinting and another aspect you can say of gradual opening. So I'm constantly being gradual. I'm constantly opening her and opening her and opening her and, she is gradually choosing to open to me. So, one person you can say is opening the other person but the other person is equally opening themselves, okay? So, this is another position that I really, really love and that I really love because women told me that they love it very much. So I have, you can see there's one hand which is very important, which is, I have a hand holding her belly. Okay, so, I'm holding the belly, my hand is cupped. Okay, and it's kind of like open and I'm just holding her belly, feeling her belly. Many women have problems with their bellies, okay? And, we can have a whole discussion about what society is doing to women and the messages that they're giving them. So, by me holding her belly, I'm also recognizing her belly. I'm appreciating her belly, I'm enjoying her belly. So I'm saying, "I love holding your belly." I'm not just going to your ass and into your breasts, okay? It's like I'm enjoying your belly. It's also a very erogenous zone. It's also a very sensitive, orgasmic, pleasurable zone. It's a very sensitive in terms of the cells and the nerves. Like you touch the belly, you have, touch your own belly and you feel you have a lot of sensations in your body. So again, I have a structure, I'm moving her slightly side to side and I'm holding her belly. Notice that I've been doing it not just because I've been talking to the camera but I've been doing this for a few minutes, and, sometimes holding a certain area in the body for a few minutes, you know, two minutes, three minutes builds more and more and more and more energy in this area rather than constantly moving between things, okay? This is an aspect that it calls, if it works, don't fix it. Okay, so it's like, if something is happening, I'm holding her, she's having some reaction, movements, moaning, pleasure, it's like, I'm just keep doing whatever I have been doing without changing anything. So the mistake that men do is they constantly try to one up, they try to improve, they try to add more, while actually just chill the fuck out and just notice what's happening and just keep doing this, keep holding wherever you're holding. So I'm holding my hand still on her lower belly and I've been holding it for a few minutes already. And again, it's like, it's again hinting, okay? So I'm not touching her pussy but this is quite an intimate way to hold somebody okay, so that's creates a hint, okay, of where we at, what's the situation, what's happening, and I'm saying, it's like I'm not going to her yoni yet, but I know it's there. So, I can be holding her with both hands, one hand can be holding the lower belly and other one can be also touching the chest, the face, and then you can play a little bit with a little bit more edgy stuff if it feels right for you and your partner, you know. So, for example, blocking the eyes. (both moaning) Especially for somebody who will be shorter than you, 'cause here it's, might be, uncomfortable after a while, but when you are, blocking one of the senses, it brings more awareness to the other senses. (both moaning) You can play with the hand on the mouth as well, again, some women would hate it, okay? So, just communicate and know that, check that it's okay. Same thing with the neck. So, I'm not choking her, I'm just, (lady moaning) gently massaging her neck. (both moaning) Yes, yes, yes, yes. (moaning) So, I've moved my hand to her chest just below her breast. And I'm just staying here for a moment. So this is this beautiful line, this is the bra line, Okay, and it's a very erogenous line. So, what I'm doing now is I'm holding her, I'm not holding her breast, I'm holding just under her breast, in the same line of the bra, okay? So the bra line is here and this is where I'm positioning my hand. And again, I'm hinting, and also it's the aspect of holding that we're gonna come back to in a moment and later in the program. So I'm holding her body in my hands, and just allowing the pleasure to build. (both moaning) Yeah, yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes yes, yes. So, for some of you, it actually might be surprising that a woman can have so much pleasure from very little, okay? I'm not touching her genitals, my cock is in my pants, you know, but still there's, I'm building energy, directing energy, making her feel safe, supported, relaxed and then this is what's arouses her. And then can I hold your breast? You know, you don't necessarily need to ask for permission with your partner just, you can say, ah, another way to ask it, would you like me to hold your breasts? Yes. Would you invite me to? Yes. Yeah, hold my breasts. Hmm, thank you. So I'm reaching and I'm holding, and then pausing. (both breathing deeply) And I'm feeling. (both breathing deeply) (indistinct) Seem like, not much it's happening in my body but I feel it's electric in place going all the way to (indistinct) in my vagina, to my heart, to my chest. It's like very intense, and very pleasurable. (both moaning) Thank you for sharing that and allow yourself to go into that if you wish to. So again, I'm still not doing anything. My hand is hardly moving, it's just, my hand is just staying with her body. So if her body's moving, I'm staying with her body. So before you start massaging the breast and you know, going for the nipple, just hold, just hold, and by the way, some women might start to feel agitated because they don't know what to do with all of this energy which is building or they're not feeling anything and they want you to do something. Okay, so, just hold, let them feel the agitation, let them go beyond the agitation and connect to the subtle sensations. And also what I'm doing is that I am feeling her breasts in my hand. (lady breathing deeply) So there's a two-way touch so, in some ways it might look like I'm touching her breasts but right now her breast is touching my hand. So, I'm feeling, you know, her nipple, I'm feeling the softness of her breasts. I'm feeling the ribs underneath, I'm feeling the sides of the breasts. It's like there's so much information going into my hand right now. And the way for you to become a good lover is to bring awareness and sensitivity into your hands. Your hands are the best sex stories that you can find anywhere. And also some of the best healing devices (chuckles) healing things that you can find. Then you can also squeeze. It's not so much squeeze, let's say it's more, I'm lifting. (lady moaning) Mmhmm. (both moaning) Notice what these really small changes is doing. (lady moaning) Yeah, that's good, yes, yes. (lady moaning) (both moaning) So this thing with lifting the breast is so beautiful so subtle and so powerful in the same time. Hmm. Hmm, that's better. Might bring some stuff around breasts. Hmm. Most women have stuff around their breasts. Hmm. (indistinct) Most women would like their breasts to be different, to look different. Okay, 'cause society gives us this messages about what breasts are supposed to look like. So by just touching and holding a woman's breasts, it's like you bring awareness and you bring love into her breasts, you bring recognition, you bring, yeah, well, love again. So, just this act of holding some of these breasts without playing with them too much, is so healing and so empowering. (both moaning) And after I remove my hands from the breast I just let her feel. Because, especially on her right breast she will be feeling my hands for a few minutes because I was holding her breast for so long. It might also bring some emotions (indistinct) like I've been moaning with some kind between pleasure and sadness. (indistinct) If there is sadness and the woman is crying, you can say, "yes, yes baby, it's beautiful to cry, I love seeing you cry, it's so beautiful that you expressing yourself." So just, or you can say, this is another attitude in this whole program and in my work which is saying yes to whatever the person is experiencing. (both moaning) How do you feel? Open. Open, what else? Charged. Mmhmm. Yeah. So, this was one way to do this and there's, many, many ways, and every time I, my shoulders, it's a little bit different. And every time you will do it, don't try to do it exactly as I did it. Don't try to follow the steps one by one, I'm giving you a palette of colors and you can paint your own picture with these colors, okay? So generally, remember the reminders, remember the attitudes, you know, it's like, bring awareness to your breath, bring awareness to your whole body, provide a structure, be really stable, and also with the other hand, you know, do something else, teasing or hinting, which means touching near someplace, some erogenous place in order to bring awareness to it, creating a movement, you know, so creating rhythm, going with a woman from up to down, being always gradual, being always slower and softer than what you think that, than what you're doing right now, always aiming on the side of slower and softer. Yeah. Mmhmm. Any other recommendation for the men watching? Saying yes, that was really powerful. Saying yes, so me saying yes to you? Mmhmm. Supporting the process. Mmhmm. And, staying, standing the ground when the woman wants to move out of that space, because it might be a little uncomfortable, she has never felt that before, yeah, just being firm and this is the space and you can be soft and you can be gentle. So telling the woman, she can be soft and she can be gentle? Yes. Or feeling. So not letting her ran away kind of, it's kind of like- Yeah, mmhmm. Darling, I'm here for you, and if you wanna cry you know, cry in my arms and, it's totally okay to cry. Mmhm. Yeah? Because I think for many women, this can be very it can be space that they have never explored before, and, they think that pleasure or foreplay and orgasm and touch is about feeling the pleasure and that there can be so many more and other emotions coming up. That's a beautiful thing to remember, thank you for this reminder. So, generally in this program, in what we're doing it's not just about pleasure, it's also about healing so, with healing, there might be sadness, anger, frustration, there might be many many kinds of emotions which are coming up and we are talking about this and suddenly the wind is picking up. Okay, so this is what's happens, you know, sometimes there's a storm and whatever you do don't ever tell a woman don't cry, you know, there's men that go like, "oh, don't cry, it's okay, it's okay." No, just the opposite, you know, just affirm when the person expressing their emotion and say, "oh, it's so beautiful that you're crying." You know, or say yes, so when a woman is crying in my arms, when a woman's doing anything in my arms, I keep saying yes. So something in her brain goes like, I keep hearing yes, so whatever I'm doing is right, 'cause so many people are doing that think that whatever they're doing is wrong. So keep affirming, keep supporting the woman's experience. Mmhmm. Thank you for that. Yes. That was a good reminder for me to share. Thank you. So I'll see you in the next video and I would recommend practicing this as a, kind of like as an experience by itself it doesn't have to lead to anything else. So you can have kind of like a date evening with your partner and you can just do this for half an hour or an hour, just sensual hugging, kissing, maybe touching the breasts, avoiding the genitals, or maybe touching the genitals from the outside. You know, there's so many things that you can do apart from genital touch and sex, so, explore that and I'll see you in the next video. (birds chirping) (both moaning) So whenever you do anything, whenever you change anything, whatever you go into a new situation, whatever you touch a new body part that you haven't touched before, whenever you're going to a new position, the first thing that you do is pause. So before you start adding more, doing more, trying more you pause and by the way, pausing right now, we still moving but it's a very, very, I don't know if automatic is the right word but it's like, we're hardly doing anything. Natural. Natural, thank you. Okay, so I turn her around and I'm letting her in myself relax and feel what's going on before I start doing stuff, okay? So that's something we're gonna go back to again and again, pause whenever there's any, thing that is changing or happening you can pause and you can feel what's going on instead of doing more. I've just positioned myself so again, my hipbone is between her ass cheeks. Hmm. Which is again, another form of hinting and another aspect you can say of gradual opening. So I'm constantly being gradual. I'm constantly opening her and opening her and opening her and, she is gradually choosing to open to me. So, one person you can say is opening the other person but the other person is equally opening themselves, okay? So, this is another position that I really, really love and that I really love because women told me that they love it very much. So I have, you can see there's one hand which is very important, which is, I have a hand holding her belly. Okay, so, I'm holding the belly, my hand is cupped. Okay, and it's kind of like open and I'm just holding her belly, feeling her belly. Many women have problems with their bellies, okay? And, we can have a whole discussion about what society is doing to women and the messages that they're giving them. So, by me holding her belly, I'm also recognizing her belly. I'm appreciating her belly, I'm enjoying her belly. So I'm saying, "I love holding your belly." I'm not just going to your ass and into your breasts, okay? It's like I'm enjoying your belly. It's also a very erogenous zone. It's also a very sensitive, orgasmic, pleasurable zone. It's a very sensitive in terms of the cells and the nerves. Like you touch the belly, you have, touch your own belly and you feel you have a lot of sensations in your body. So again, I have a structure, I'm moving her slightly side to side and I'm holding her belly. Notice that I've been doing it not just because I've been talking to the camera but I've been doing this for a few minutes, and, sometimes holding a certain area in the body for a few minutes, you know, two minutes, three minutes builds more and more and more and more energy in this area rather than constantly moving between things, okay? This is an aspect that it calls, if it works, don't fix it. Okay, so it's like, if something is happening, I'm holding her, she's having some reaction, movements, moaning, pleasure, it's like, I'm just keep doing whatever I have been doing without changing anything. So the mistake that men do is they constantly try to one up, they try to improve, they try to add more, while actually just chill the fuck out and just notice what's happening and just keep doing this, keep holding wherever you're holding. So I'm holding my hand still on her lower belly and I've been holding it for a few minutes already. And again, it's like, it's again hinting, okay? So I'm not touching her pussy but this is quite an intimate way to hold somebody okay, so that's creates a hint, okay, of where we at, what's the situation, what's happening, and I'm saying, it's like I'm not going to her yoni yet, but I know it's there. So, I can be holding her with both hands, one hand can be holding the lower belly and other one can be also touching the chest, the face, and then you can play a little bit with a little bit more edgy stuff if it feels right for you and your partner, you know. So, for example, blocking the eyes. (both moaning) Especially for somebody who will be shorter than you, 'cause here it's, might be, uncomfortable after a while, but when you are, blocking one of the senses, it brings more awareness to the other senses. (both moaning) You can play with the hand on the mouth as well, again, some women would hate it, okay? So, just communicate and know that, check that it's okay. Same thing with the neck. So, I'm not choking her, I'm just, (lady moaning) gently massaging her neck. (both moaning) Yes, yes, yes, yes. (moaning) So, I've moved my hand to her chest just below her breast. And I'm just staying here for a moment. So this is this beautiful line, this is the bra line, Okay, and it's a very erogenous line. So, what I'm doing now is I'm holding her, I'm not holding her breast, I'm holding just under her breast, in the same line of the bra, okay? So the bra line is here and this is where I'm positioning my hand. And again, I'm hinting, and also it's the aspect of holding that we're gonna come back to in a moment and later in the program. So I'm holding her body in my hands, and just allowing the pleasure to build. (both moaning) Yeah, yes, yes. Yes, yes, yes yes, yes. So, for some of you, it actually might be surprising that a woman can have so much pleasure from very little, okay? I'm not touching her genitals, my cock is in my pants, you know, but still there's, I'm building energy, directing energy, making her feel safe, supported, relaxed and then this is what's arouses her. And then can I hold your breast? You know, you don't necessarily need to ask for permission with your partner just, you can say, ah, another way to ask it, would you like me to hold your breasts? Yes. Would you invite me to? Yes. Yeah, hold my breasts. Hmm, thank you. So I'm reaching and I'm holding, and then pausing. (both breathing deeply) And I'm feeling. (both breathing deeply) (indistinct) Seem like, not much it's happening in my body but I feel it's electric in place going all the way to (indistinct) in my vagina, to my heart, to my chest. It's like very intense, and very pleasurable. (both moaning) Thank you for sharing that and allow yourself to go into that if you wish to. So again, I'm still not doing anything. My hand is hardly moving, it's just, my hand is just staying with her body. So if her body's moving, I'm staying with her body. So before you start massaging the breast and you know, going for the nipple, just hold, just hold, and by the way, some women might start to feel agitated because they don't know what to do with all of this energy which is building or they're not feeling anything and they want you to do something. Okay, so, just hold, let them feel the agitation, let them go beyond the agitation and connect to the subtle sensations. And also what I'm doing is that I am feeling her breasts in my hand. (lady breathing deeply) So there's a two-way touch so, in some ways it might look like I'm touching her breasts but right now her breast is touching my hand. So, I'm feeling, you know, her nipple, I'm feeling the softness of her breasts. I'm feeling the ribs underneath, I'm feeling the sides of the breasts. It's like there's so much information going into my hand right now. And the way for you to become a good lover is to bring awareness and sensitivity into your hands. Your hands are the best sex stories that you can find anywhere. And also some of the best healing devices (chuckles) healing things that you can find. Then you can also squeeze. It's not so much squeeze, let's say it's more, I'm lifting. (lady moaning) Mmhmm. (both moaning) Notice what these really small changes is doing. (lady moaning) Yeah, that's good, yes, yes. (lady moaning) (both moaning) So this thing with lifting the breast is so beautiful so subtle and so powerful in the same time. Hmm. Hmm, that's better. Might bring some stuff around breasts. Hmm. Most women have stuff around their breasts. Hmm. (indistinct) Most women would like their breasts to be different, to look different. Okay, 'cause society gives us this messages about what breasts are supposed to look like. So by just touching and holding a woman's breasts, it's like you bring awareness and you bring love into her breasts, you bring recognition, you bring, yeah, well, love again. So, just this act of holding some of these breasts without playing with them too much, is so healing and so empowering. (both moaning) And after I remove my hands from the breast I just let her feel. Because, especially on her right breast she will be feeling my hands for a few minutes because I was holding her breast for so long. It might also bring some emotions (indistinct) like I've been moaning with some kind between pleasure and sadness. (indistinct) If there is sadness and the woman is crying, you can say, "yes, yes baby, it's beautiful to cry, I love seeing you cry, it's so beautiful that you expressing yourself." So just, or you can say, this is another attitude in this whole program and in my work which is saying yes to whatever the person is experiencing. (both moaning) How do you feel? Open. Open, what else? Charged. Mmhmm. Yeah. So, this was one way to do this and there's, many, many ways, and every time I, my shoulders, it's a little bit different. And every time you will do it, don't try to do it exactly as I did it. Don't try to follow the steps one by one, I'm giving you a palette of colors and you can paint your own picture with these colors, okay? So generally, remember the reminders, remember the attitudes, you know, it's like, bring awareness to your breath, bring awareness to your whole body, provide a structure, be really stable, and also with the other hand, you know, do something else, teasing or hinting, which means touching near someplace, some erogenous place in order to bring awareness to it, creating a movement, you know, so creating rhythm, going with a woman from up to down, being always gradual, being always slower and softer than what you think that, than what you're doing right now, always aiming on the side of slower and softer. Yeah. Mmhmm. Any other recommendation for the men watching? Saying yes, that was really powerful. Saying yes, so me saying yes to you? Mmhmm. Supporting the process. Mmhmm. And, staying, standing the ground when the woman wants to move out of that space, because it might be a little uncomfortable, she has never felt that before, yeah, just being firm and this is the space and you can be soft and you can be gentle. So telling the woman, she can be soft and she can be gentle? Yes. Or feeling. So not letting her ran away kind of, it's kind of like- Yeah, mmhmm. Darling, I'm here for you, and if you wanna cry you know, cry in my arms and, it's totally okay to cry. Mmhm. Yeah? Because I think for many women, this can be very it can be space that they have never explored before, and, they think that pleasure or foreplay and orgasm and touch is about feeling the pleasure and that there can be so many more and other emotions coming up. That's a beautiful thing to remember, thank you for this reminder. So, generally in this program, in what we're doing it's not just about pleasure, it's also about healing so, with healing, there might be sadness, anger, frustration, there might be many many kinds of emotions which are coming up and we are talking about this and suddenly the wind is picking up. Okay, so this is what's happens, you know, sometimes there's a storm and whatever you do don't ever tell a woman don't cry, you know, there's men that go like, "oh, don't cry, it's okay, it's okay." No, just the opposite, you know, just affirm when the person expressing their emotion and say, "oh, it's so beautiful that you're crying." You know, or say yes, so when a woman is crying in my arms, when a woman's doing anything in my arms, I keep saying yes. So something in her brain goes like, I keep hearing yes, so whatever I'm doing is right, 'cause so many people are doing that think that whatever they're doing is wrong. So keep affirming, keep supporting the woman's experience. Mmhmm. Thank you for that. Yes. That was a good reminder for me to share. Thank you. So I'll see you in the next video and I would recommend practicing this as a, kind of like as an experience by itself it doesn't have to lead to anything else. So you can have kind of like a date evening with your partner and you can just do this for half an hour or an hour, just sensual hugging, kissing, maybe touching the breasts, avoiding the genitals, or maybe touching the genitals from the outside. You know, there's so many things that you can do apart from genital touch and sex, so, explore that and I'll see you in the next video. (birds chirping) So this is another exercise another thing for you to experience. And it's quite important because it's good to have a few steps between, you know, nothing between what we did earlier, which is the sensual hug and between, you know, genital touch, Yoni massage, or sex. So we go, you know, standing, sitting, lying down and this is something that you can do during sex. This is something you can do during foreplay, and obviously you can do this also as a as a preparation for Yoni massage or any kind of sensual experience with your partner. Some of what we're doing now will be repeating what we did earlier and also anticipating what we'll be doing later, because honestly, I'm in some ways I'll be repeating the same things over and over again in the program, just in different settings, in different positions. Because basically it's very, very simple. It's just a few attitudes, just a few reminders and it's important for you to know the reminders. So you don't need to remember specific whatever finger techniques or whatever erogenous points or lines or whatever, it's very, very easy. So what we'll be doing is sitting and eye gazing, and eye gazing is literally something that many people don't do. I held this workshop once in Sweden, and this couple told me it's like we've been together for a year and we never held eye contact for this long, which I found a bit surprising and a bit sad. So eye gazing is so important and so beautiful. And as I mentioned earlier, it's not just, eyegazing is also body gazing. So with you eyes you're looking at your partner's body and both of you can be looking at each other's bodies and that is something for you to enjoy first of all because I personally really enjoy looking at women's bodies, and it also creates a connection, creates a recognition. It's a way to say, I love your body. So I'm loving whatever I'm looking at. I am appreciating, I'm adoring, whatever I'm looking at. One thing that might come up for some women, for many women I would say nearly for all women is body issues. So even the most beautiful women always have like something that they don't like about their body. So we would look at that and they would feel like, oh no don't look at my, I don't know, don't look at my fat thighs or don't, you know, touch or whatever, my fat thighs. And I would say, it's like, I love your juicy thighs. So this is, this is an aspect in Tantra which is called transfiguration. Transfiguration is seeing through or seeing beyond, seeing really the goddess inside a woman, the goddess that the woman already is. So look for the things that you like, enjoy, appreciate in the person. And it's very, very important that even if you hear your mind saying, having some judgements about specific things in the woman, don't fall into that okay? So keep looking for what you like, not for what you don't like. And yeah. So what we'll be doing is a little bit of eye gazing a little bit of body transfiguration, again looking for what you love and expressing appreciation. You can also do this verbally. So you can say, I love this and I love this and I love that about you. And again, this is something which is so beautiful and so tender for people to hear what you love about them, what you appreciate about them, what you find hot about them. And it's a good place to remind you that everything that we're doing in this program, it's really good if you receive that as well. So don't just stay in the place of, you're just giving, you're just doing, you're just expressing, you're just pleasuring. With everything that we're doing, you can suggest to your partner ask your partner, invite your partner to do the same thing for you as well. So maybe your partner cannot give you whatever Yoni massage, and a cervical orgasm, but she can give you a lingam massage, a penis massage. And obviously she can also share beautiful words and appreciation with you. So we'll be doing that. And the next thing that we'll be doing is going to be a position which will be more, a little bit more intimate, which is called the yab yum. Some people like to call it yab yummy because it's very, very yummy. And it's a position that really allows you to experience some kind of energetic sex, which means you know, we're both keeping our clothes on, there's no penetration. Maybe there's not even genital touch with the hands, but all of our bodies are aligned, our genitals are aligned, and we're really close to each other and it allows to some movement as well. So very beautiful position to experience together. Yeah. So. (deep breath) Hello again. (deep breath) Another reminder that Alicia just reminded me is that keep your body relaxed, strive to stay as much upright as possible. I was crouching a moment ago, so it's really good to to generally stay upright, but relaxed. Have your face relaxed so you can smile, it's totally okay to smile. If it feels natural, don't have kind of like the stern look, some women tell me that men look at them like like with this, oh look how present I am. You know, it's like sometimes just relax your face, you will be much more present if you relaxed. And breathe, breathe through your belly, relax your breath and really find the natural breath. And it, it can also be audible. So. (deep breath) Okay so when you're breathing, you're reminding your partner to breathe. So your breath facilitates, initiates, reminds her to breathe. (deep breaths) So what you can actually do is turn it into a little bit of a structured exercise if you like, which is, with showing appreciation, expressing appreciation, you can say one thing that you appreciate about your partner, and then it's very important for your partner to just pause for a moment and just receive it, feel it, see what it does in her body and in her being. And then she says something positive of appreciation to you and again, you take it in, relax into it, feel how it feels in your body, and really try to empty your mind so you don't think about the next thing, you just look at her body, look at her face and just find and express what you are really like, appreciate and being turned on by. Okay, so it can be kind of like loving and romantic and can be whatever, kinky, hot, sexual, you know? So let's, let's explore some of that. I really love your juicy lips. So. (deep breaths) I melt when you look at me with your honey eyes. I love them. (deep breaths) I love your cheeks and your cheekbones and your jaw, this Slavic structure. So beautiful. I love the sound of your voice, and when you say body. Body. I love the white straight teeth, so beautiful teeth. (deep breaths) I love your masculine animal, like chest. (deep breaths) I love your beautiful breasts and how sensitive they are. (deep breaths) I love the color of your skin, it's sunkissed. And the texture when it touches my body. (deep breaths) I love your belly and how you allow your belly to melt into my hand and that it's soft. (deep breath) I love your penis. I love your cock, your lingam. Perfectly matching my vagina. I love your pussy and how tender and soft and juicy she is. (deep breaths) I love your body. I love your smile and your laughter, and specifically when you have this (light chucking) I love when you move your eyes the way you do. Like, just takes me on a ride. What, like move them around your body or? No there's this one thing that you do with your eyes that they roll back. Yeah. But it's not like crazy rolling. It's just this gentle, like something's happening. It's a mysterious. I love your juicy thighs. So juicy, and looking at them, touching them, kissing them biting them and feeling them around me and around my waist when we make love. It's like, I want to fuck you at your waist. So it's like, if there was like a hole here and I could just just fuck your waist, just penetrate your waist. I love your bum so much. Bite it, kiss it, just hang out on it, sleep on it. So strong yet soft. (deep breath) I love your body. I love your softness and your intensity, and how they are sometimes in the same time. (deep breaths) Thank you for your expressing appreciation, and thank you for receiving mine. So the next thing we're gonna explore is kinda like the next step. So we're going from standing to sitting in front of each other, and then to having body contact, or more body contact while sitting. This can be part of your foreplay, this can be part of giving essential massage to your partner, this can also be part of lovemaking. It's a very beautiful position to be sitting and facing each other because although you can't move much as you can do while standing, your body can still move in a different way than if one of you is lying on top of each other, or even sitting on top of each other. So both of us sitting allow for a certain kind of movement, also kind of a certain kind of touch. So both of us can touch each other's bodies. As with other exercises, you'll be surprised how much pleasure and how much orgasm it can also create for both partners. It also creates a lot of weight on your genitals, guys. So make sure that you know that you're not gonna ejaculate. So with this rubbing and all of this sexual energy, you might be tempted to get close to ejaculation, I really, really recommend you not to cum in your pants and even to ask your partner to get off you if that happens. And in another program I have, whatever many, many hours talking about and teaching ejaculation control, ejaculation mastery. So make sure that you don't ejaculate because if you ejaculate you would lose a lot of the desire and the connection that you have with your partner. So another thing is that also with the exercise of sitting in front of each other, if you're not flexible, and if you don't have such a good blood circulation, I don't have such a good blood circulation, you can totally sit on chairs, so you can sit on chairs in front of each other. And then you can sit on a chair and your partner can be struggling you as we will show in a moment. So it's totally okay to sit on chairs, there's no problems. This position is called Yub Yum, we like to call it Yub Yummy because it's very yummy. (lady moans) Yum exactly. Also it have some energetic effect, it aligns your energy, energy centers with each other, really, really nice position. So yeah, would you like to hop on? I'll be positioning my genitals in the way that, my cock in a way that is between us so you're not sitting on it. Kinda like wrap your legs around me and open them to the side and stay like stay more up so I don't have to hold you so much. Does that make sense? hmm. Let me slip into something more comfortable. (both breathing heavily) So guys, you would notice that I'm doing a few things similar to what I did before. So I'm holding, so now I'm holding her in the middle of her back to support her weight. It makes more sense now to hold it there. I'm also holding her in her lower back, I'm breathing into my belly which brings awareness to her genitals in her belly. I'm not to be stretching but making sure that I'm not crouching 'cause I have a tendency to crouch so I'm extending lengthening my spine, my neck. (both breathing heavily) So I'm making small circles which is similar to what I was doing earlier with rhythm as we were standing. So I'm just creating some movement and I'm just keeping it the same movement. (both breathing heavily) You can make the circles a bit bigger. (both breathing heavily) You can hug closely and move together. (both breathing heavily) Find your breath. (both breathing heavily) Yes, yes baby. (both breathing heavily) Notice what I'm doing with her, with the hair in the back of her head is that I'm grabbing as much hair as possible and then just slightly pulling it. You can also grab the neck itself. They have they have a similar feeling, similar effect. Make sure that you start gentle. (both breathing heavily) Then you release after a while. So sometimes people, when they just see this for the first time they think it's aggressive, abusive, I can tell you that most, most, most most of the women that I've been with, have really loved this. It draws awareness, draws energy here, it moves energy along the body. And it's also a way of holding and yeah, there's also a little bit of intensity in this movement, which is really, really nice. (both breathing softly) So here, you can continue doing this for a while, it's like, you can explore breasts and you can touch each other. So it's not just a man touching the woman but the woman can touch the man as well. (both breathing softly) Without even thinking about it, I was like, "Oh, I'm really enjoying her thighs." So really it's a way to connect and appreciate and arouse and enjoy. So really, you can also enjoy your partner's body. Then you can lay your partner down. She also allows me to relax more so I don't have to hold her. And you can place one hand in the middle of her chest, another hand on her lower belly. Later, we can place that hand on her Yoni but for now we just keep it on the lower belly. Another option is for one of the hands to hold her hand because it's very beautiful to have hand connection. (both breathing softly) You can caress with this line that goes in the middle of the body and there's specific importance for the middle of the body, both in the front and in the back. So you'll notice that a lot of time I'll just be going over the middle of the body up and down. And obviously you can go all around the body as well it's not just the middle. There's something powerful about going up and down the middle. (lady breathing softly) So reach and touch there. (lady breathing heavily) She releases energy, emotions, pleasure. (both breathing softly) And notice that many times I'm just witnessing her and enjoying her, so I don't have to do anything. I don't have to rub her hair or rub myself. I'm just enjoying looking at a beautiful woman, being, breathing, whatever she's doing, I'm enjoying her body and enjoying looking at her. You don't need much. And also for her it creates a space that she feels that you're not trying to do too much. You're not trying to achieve anything, you're not trying to make her orgasm or whatever. You're just looking at her, loving her, accepting her, worshiping her, as she is without either of you needing to do anything. So this is another example of what I talked earlier about the pause. So you just pause and you just feel and witness whatever there is. (both breathing softly) Yes, yes... Did it ever happen to you that you did something with your partner and she was really liking it. And then later she said, "Do that thing you did earlier." And you didn't remember what that was. Or maybe she touched you in a certain way and it was exactly what you like and again, you couldn't find the language. Or sometimes you try to explain to your partner how to touch you, but you're not finding the words. So, lighter but not this kind of light or how this strong but not this kind of strong. So what we're missing is a language of touch. Many people are used to touch in one way. And for me I've met many women, made love with many women. And I noticed that people have one or two way that they touch. And it's important to know that there's many, many kinds of touch. There's many possibility to touch. Some of them feel more sensual. Some of them feel lighter and more loving and it's good to know all of that. So this exercise that we're doing is gonna cover some of that. And also if you ever wanted to give a massage and were afraid to give a massage, cause you didn't know that techniques, you didn't know exactly what to do. You're afraid to hurt them, you're afraid of not doing not doing the right thing, not doing where the spots are. This is a really simple version of a massage and it's happening without oil which is really, really good. So this is something that you can do anywhere anytime. And as you can see, I'm also be doing some things that I was doing earlier. Some strokes and some ways of movement I was doing earlier without naming them. So now I'm gonna name them and show you about the different kinds of touch. This is called the five elements sensual touch. And it's also based on tantra and tantric principles on the five elements related to chakras, also related to different archetypes. So the more, virginic and innocent archetype or the more wild archetype brings a lot of elements together. So this might be a very arousing experience. This might also be a healing experience there might be different emotions that becoming up for both of you. There might be certain judgments about some of the ways of touch that you're gonna see. So really keep an open mind, see that the modeled woman I'm working with is in full consent and really happy to receive this. And if he doesn't receive that you're gonna communicate to me what she's okay with, what she's not okay with. So you can share with your partner that she's able to say at any time, ask you to stop if there's something that you're doing which is not working for her and really build this communication and the ability for her to, the invitation for her to really say what she wants and what she doesn't want. Which also means if she is enjoying something, she can ask for more. And we're going to do this as a structured exercise. And just so you know that you don't need to do this structured exercise. You can and it's a good idea to experiment this with your partner, you give to her, she gives to you after some time. But also this is something that literally you will use everywhere. You will use it in your foreplay. You will use it in sex. You'll use it later in Yoni massage. It's like there's many. And also you would see that you would use it in your life because different people have different elements or qualities, and maybe they're missing other qualities. So let's say if you're very soft, live like a really soft guy, very loving guy that's beautiful. You have what we call the air element but maybe you're missing the fire element. Women want you to be more of animal. They want you to be more earthy, more grounded. Okay. So this is a way for you. It's not just about sexuality. It's literally about your life. And it's about what you're doing with your life and how successful you are and how expressing you are of all of your parts, okay? So this is a really good example to see which elements and which energies and which aspects of life you're resonating with and which are triggering for you, which are still not comfortable, not natural for you and it's a good idea for you to experiment with them. So one of the things that you can do is for example in this exercise, you can do this for 10 minutes, 20 minutes, 30 minutes, you give to her and then she gives to you for 20 minutes. And another option is right now the model is nearly naked. This is something you can literally do with clothes on. So even if there's clothes, you can do this on cloths. And also the first you can do this in three sessions. So let's say the first session is the whole body touch without the genitals. The second session is you integrate the genitals as well. And if possible, just externally, not internally. The third session you can do including the internal genitals, Yoni massage and also sex, if that feels right. And this will allow you to make sure that you're including all of the five elements in everything that you do and you're not skipping or missing any one of them. So let's see how this looks like, feels like and sounds like. So I just wanna say that, although I'm enjoying it very much, I'm doing this for you and for us. So you're welcome to receive this as a gift, as an offering. Now, we can do the other part of the exercise of you giving to me later or another day. So you can just receive and don't worry about giving me back, okay? So the first touch, and you can be doing this on your own skin. So this is the air touch. And the air touch is very, very light. So just the tips of the fingers touching the skin. So you make sure that when you touch the skin, your hand doesn't go into the skin. Okay. It doesn't, it hardly touches. Okay. So it doesn't go into the flesh. It's just on the level of the skin. And this is a very, very gentle, very slightly central, more, you can say innocent or loving, all of them are loving, but this is, in some ways it's so soft that it really allows you to connect to this more subtle aspect of touch. The face is a really good place to touch with this element. And I can also be using, I have, you know, hairs on the back of my hand. So I can be using the hair for a very, very gentle, very, very light touch. You can also be using fabric. So what I'm doing with the fabric is I'm moving the fabric very lightly over her body and, and yeah, you can also do this with a sarong. So something like this is a really good thing to use for the air element. And for example, I can start from her feet, from her legs and feet. (inhales and exhales deeply) Just breathe the sensation. (inhales and exhales deeply) Another thing that you can do is use more surface of cloth. (inhales and exhales deeply) Another way to play with the element, express the air element is with air. (inhales and exhales deeply) So just by blowing air, this is another way to express the air element. And you can do a few of them like the element in two different ways. (inhales and exhales deeply) And remember the aspects and reminders and approaches and attitudes we talked about earlier. So it's not wrong to do this on the nipple, but let's say, first of all you build it and build it and build it for a while. And then you can very, very lightly touch the nipple as well, but make sure that you're not focused on the erogenous zones, but the whole idea of this exercise is to bring awareness to all of the body. This is why in this session, and what I recommend you also in the first session, not to include the genitals. So do not get focused on the genitals. If you're doing it as a, as an exercise, or as a session, also, I recommend not to kiss. Not that kissing is bad, but sometimes you would just fall into the patterns of kissing and arousing that way that you know. And this allows you to learn the most important, one of the most important things that you have in your body which is your hands. So it's the capacity to feel and the capacity to pleasure through your hands. Okay. So notice that the movement is very, it's quite slow, very, very light, just the very tips of the fingers. So it's not all of the surface of the skin, it's just the tips of the fingers or my hairy arms. She's very light as well. And if you have long hair, by the way if you're a guy that has long hair, very much, unlike me, you can use your hair and you can move your hair on her body as well. So the next element. The next element is the water element. And I'm going to show this to you and (instructor clearing throat) I'll ask you to do this as well. So, if the air element is just the tips of the fingers, the water element is all over the surface of the skin, but very, very light. It's still light, (instructor clearing throat) you're still not pushing into the skin. You're making sure that you're covering as much surface of the skin as possible, okay? So, really, it's as if you have oil in your hands and you're just rubbing the oil very lightly without pushing into the skin. You're rubbing the oil very lightly all over the skin with all of the surface of your skin. And you can also use your forearms, okay? This would be still the water 'cause I'm using all of the surface of the skin. If you can position yourself for all of the elements in a way that you can use both of your hands and even more of your body, that's great. And notice that I'm not pressing the skin, okay? So, you don't see this when I'm doing the water element, I'm not going into the skin. This is why I'm not calling this whole session a massage, okay? I'm just riding, just gliding over the skin. (woman groaning) Yes baby, you just keep expressing everything that I'm doing with a sound. So, every sensation has a sound, every stroke has a sound, every feeling has a sound. (woman groaning) So, I'm going between different body parts. (woman groaning) As long as it feels watery and flowing, you know, so, I'm making sure that there's some kind of flow, some kind of movement. (woman groaning) You can be going on one area for a while. (woman groaning) Can be going along this line in the middle of the body we talked about. (woman groaning) Can you touch the face. So, this is different touch than how we touched the face earlier. (woman breathing heavily) Still light, but really using all of the surface of the skin. (woman groaning) And throughout making sure, guys, that you are relaxed. (woman groaning) Your body is relaxed, your breath is relaxed, your hand is relaxed. So, make sure that all of your hand is relaxed because if your hand is tight, you wouldn't be able to have the sensitivity in your hand and this kind of touch, which is very light. So, all of my hand is, my body and my hand is relaxed and I'm just using the minimal amount of muscles to move. This is really something I see many guys and honestly women, it's like they have so much tightness in their body. (woman groaning) And obviously you can cover, you know, all of the body (woman groaning) and go through all of the body with this touch. Some people will have a skin. (woman groaning) Oh, hello. (instructor laughing) (woman groaning) So, notice what I'm doing here (woman groaning) is the same element of hinting or teasing or going around. So, our kind of like agreement for this exercise is I'm not gonna touch your genitals but I'm gonna go really, really close. So, I'm constantly building and building and building. (woman groaning) So, something about skin. So, some people would have a skin, either you or your partner, would have a skin which is less easy to glide on. So, if somebody is sweaty, for example, although it's watery, it still would be less easy to glide on. One of the things that you do is you can keep wiping the skin, your skin or your partner's skin, so it will be easier. And also some elements would maybe work less with some people, and it's okay. So, don't worry about it so much. In generally, don't try to get things perfect in this program, it's really about doing what you can, finding your own way to do what I'm sharing with you. Okay. So, forget about perfect, find you, okay? So, don't do a (indistinct) massage, do your massage or your touch or your (instructor clearing throat) yoni massage or your lovemaking, whatever it is that you're doing. So, this was the water element. (woman breathing heavily) Another thing to do with the water element that we're not doing right now is using saliva. Actually, I can show for one example of that. (woman groaning) Yeah. So, licking would be another thing to do but (woman groaning) kinda like be careful with that. And I wanna make sure that most of what you do is with your hands, because if you're going to licking her body, licking is beautiful and you can literally give somebody a whole body lick. But trying to do everything with your hands. So, I'm... It's like, I don't need anything but my hands. So, just with my hands, I can... You can even, say, initiate, transmit, give an experience of the five elements. I don't need anything else. I don't need my mouth, I don't need my cock, I don't need anything. So, just with my hands I'm able to transmit the experience, the energy of the water element. And this is what I suggest you to do as well. This is why I'm suggesting not to kiss. This is why I'm suggesting not to use your mouth so much. And also not to touch the genitals, so, you explore all of the body and not just stay focused on the same areas that you know and that maybe she's used to guys touching her all the time. So, if you start touching a woman here, (woman groaning) It's probably an area she didn't have touch so much. It's under the armpits. Oh, hello. When a woman is doing this it's like she's saying, she's opening herself. She's saying, "I'm exposing my skin to you, please touch me more." So, that's what I call an invitation. (woman groaning) And all of this is still with the water element. I had a friend who was a bit of a lover, we never had sex, but we had a lot of sexual energy, you know, shared and, twice already through a few years, she gave me a massage, not exactly a massage, but an inexperience of touch. So, she touched me like this all over my body. So, she would take my hand and she would really like, just do this really, really soft movement all over my hand, all over my legs, all over my body, not including my genitals. So, all of the body, just with this element. So, this is powerful, this is beautiful, this is very, very nurturing. It can be very transformational for somebody to receive all of the five elements and also some elements specifically. So, I just wanna check in, darling, how do you feel? (woman groaning) How are you liking the air and the water thus far? It's amazing. So, (clears throat) the next element is earth. And what you will notice, is that we starting from very, very subtle, tips of the fingers, and we going into skin, and now we going into the flesh and into the bones. So a good place to, (Woman moans) to, you can say, start with the earth element is the feet. (exhales loudly) (Woman moans) So a good place to start with the earth element, and I would like you to do this on your body is really push into the flesh. So it's not this anymore, it's going into. So I'm really going into the flesh. So it's a really strong, slow, gradual stable touch. (Woman moans) So, for example, what I can do with her feet, is I can hold and I'm gently squeezing, not too much. (Woman moans) And that's a very grounding touch. Ah. I'm not massaging, there's no oil. Woman: Ah. I'm just holding the feet. You can also hold one foot with two hands. (Woman breathing loudly and moaning) Again, just holding, not massaging, just holding. (Woman moans) Mm. Mm. (Woman moans) Mm. So, the earth element doesn't slide, doesn't glide, the earth element, and I'm just gonna show you that on, on hers, on her body. So the earth element, if you see my hands I'm going somewhere, it's like traveling. Yeah, I'm going somewhere, I'm landing and I'm grounding. So I'm pushing into the body. (Woman moans) Okay, be careful with pressing bones. You can always ask for feedback. (Woman moans) And then when I decide to leave, I pack my suitcases and then I fly to another place. (Woman moans) Okay, so I have my hands on her body, I remove them, I go somewhere else, (Woman moans) I land, put my bags down, apply weight. I'm just here, (Woman moans) just so you know, I'm not pressing too hard into the bone. It's more like I'm, I'm holding, I'm holding her down, slightly squeezing the flesh. Great, and now the thighs are really good place (Woman moans) to apply this, this weight. So I'm literally putting my body weight into. (Woman moans) (Woman and Man moan) Yes baby, yes. Yes darling. (Woman moans and exhales) Yes. So notice I'm staying for 10, 15, 20 seconds in an area. (Woman moans) And then I'm gradually removing, I'm not gliding over the skin, I'm going in the air. You can do this over clothes as well. (Woman moaning) Can I apply more weight? Yes. So I'm just leaning in and- Yeah. Putting more weight on the body. (Woman moans) (Woman and Man moaning) (Woman and Man moaning) (Woman and Man moaning) (Woman moans) And then, I'm going to the hips. (Woman moans) So I'm just on the, the, the hip bones pressing on the, that's the, the joint here, and there's a line in the skin and I'm just pressing my- Woman: Oh yeah! Pressing my hands on this line and I'm feeling the pulse running through her, (Woman moans) through her body. (Woman exhales and moans) Mm. Mm. Mm. (Woman moans) And then you can really press different areas of the body with, with this touch. Woman: Oh, yes. (Woman exhales and moans) (Woman and Man exhale loudly) (Woman inhales and exhales loudly) Breath through your belly. (Woman exhales and moans) Yes, through your belly. Breath, inhale through your belly. (Woman exhales loudly) So let your belly inflate when you breath. Yeah. So whenever she's moaning or saying yes or anything like that is happening, keep doing exactly what you've been doing. (Woman moans) Mm. (Woman moans) So some of the parts of the body you don't have to push too much. You can just place. (Woman moans) Again it's a very grounding, very stable touch. (clears throat) And even with the face, it's like pressing into the, into the bones of the face. (Woman moans) And even it's like this thing about holding somewhere and keeping it (Woman moans) not moving, not squeezing, not doing anything, it's also, let's say related to the, to the earth element. Can you do on my neck? Yeah, although that's, that would be the- Yeah, so just holding here, maybe it's more earth. In a moment we'll see another way to do that. (Woman inhales and exhales) (Woman and Man moan) Yeah. Yes. Yes, thank you for asking. (Woman and Man moan) (Man exhales) Another way to express the earth element, (Woman moans) (Man exhales loudly) is by applying weight. (Woman and Man moan) And again, I'm making sure that I'm not, you know, really crushing her and not breaking her ribs, but I am applying weight. (Woman moans) Does it feel nice to feel a man's weight on your body. Yes. Yes. (Woman and Man moan) (Woman moans) You can also apply weight with other parts of your body. So I am pushing my thigh in between her legs. So let's say there's no genital stimulation, (Woman moans) but you know, you know what, I don't even need to touch her Yoni, it's like, I'm even, like, leaning into her thighs. (Woman moans) (Woman and Man moaning) (Woman and Man moaning) Yes, you can also press into the, press into the genital area and you notice I'm not moving, I'm not doing anything. I'm just keeping pressure there. (Woman and Man moan) So, let's look at her face for a moment and see how her eyes are fluttering and her smile is expanding and like all of the movements and- (Woman moaning) Mm, hello? (Woman moans) (Woman and Man moan) So, it's not just about what I'm doing. I'm constantly listening to her, looking at her, looking at her body, seeing if there's tensions, and maybe when you're starting you're not aware of all of these details and all, but gradually you'll be more and more, more and more sensitive to more details that, that you see the more things that happening in her body and specifically make sure that you look at the face. The face is so important. (Woman moans) Also when she opens her eyes and you know, see that you're looking at her, it feels really really good as well. Yeah? Mm-hmm. It does? Yes. Cool. So that was earth, and now fire. So the fire element is let's say the most intense and we've been building up the intensity. It might be, well let's say it might be ticklish for many people which is totally natural for it to feel ticklish. And it also might feel triggering and even aggressive or negative for some people, especially if they have let's say some negative sexual experiences or they have some puritanistic ideas about sex and sexuality, women who are more of the kind of like virginic, innocent type, guys who are more of than nice, soft new-age guy. Very much people, very much in their feminine and kind of like the soft feminine not the intense feminine. So this is a really good experience both for you as a giver to find this energy in yourself and see how you can express it. And you're giving the gift of this energy to your recipient so she can receive this 'cause maybe until now people have only done the really, really soft touch with her and now suddenly you're giving her something that she's been yearning for. Make sure that you are sensitive and you're aware of what she's doing and what she's expressing. And you can also tell her again although we said this earlier, you know, "But darling if there's anything I'm doing "which is feels too much, painful and stuff, "just let me know." Yes. Okay. Thank you. So the fire. So first of all, on your skin. First of all, on your skin, so with the fingernails, and if you don't have fingernails, you can just turn the fingers around a little bit, and then it feels like fingernails. So scratching, squeezing. So it's different than the earth. The earth was very, very slow, very gradual. This is much faster squeezing, pinching, scratching. You can also do biting for a bit. Again, don't involve the mouth too much but biting is definitely this element, pushing, pulling, moving them, movements that dynamism and also hitting, okay? So many people associate this heating thing with something which is negative. Some people have been hit as children or got into fights as adults. But this is hitting which is actually activating the body, it's consensual and some people will really, really love it. So let's see how it looks not just on my hairy arms, but on a beautiful body. (gasping) Yeah, just if you need to move let your body move. Just let your body move, keep breathing. (woman exhales loudly) If your recipient tenses up, stop and make sure that they keep breathing, making sounds and moving. So make sure they're not going into a freeze state. Yeah. Yeah totally okay. Totally okay. (woman gasping) Yeah, just let it run through. Let it run through. Let it run through. Yeah. (woman humming) So you notice I'll be, it's like I'm squeezing the flesh. Okay. I'm squeezing, I'm moving. (man humming) It's really good to do this on fleshy areas. (woman gasping) Okay. And that's, if you wanted to have a little bit of nipple action. (gasps) (exhales loudly) Okay. So this is different than the earth before, okay. So I'm really like going into the skin, then you can also like pull the hair a little bit as we did in another exercise. Yes? Yes? Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. So in this whole exercise and specifically in this element, it's good if the recipient says yes, then we can (slapping) we can start hitting as well. Oh, you notice for a second, I was gliding. Don't do that. I was moving with the water element. So it's very important that you stay with one element so you can be hitting. Don't hit bones. Guys it doesn't feel so nice. Specifically hit fleshy areas. There's a few kinds to slap. One of them is to slap and to stay, another one is a slap, which is more of a whiplash. (slaps) Okay. And they feel different. Make sure that you're not doing this (slapping) too much. Okay. It's like immediately, she was like, she contracted. So I slap and I let it be felt. I let the energy move. I let it be received. I don't know about you. I just became really hot. Like my body suddenly is hot, I'm sweating. So this is the fire element. The fire element. Yeah. And let me turn you around 'cause this is a very beautiful thing to do with... Hello? Hello ass. Okay. So you can do all of these things. By the way, everything that we've done until now you can do it on both sides of the body. Are you okay with leaving marks on you? Okay. So you can scratch really allows us to make sounds (woman humming) that correspond to the intensity of the movement that I'm doing. (woman humming) Yes. So also this kind of like squeezing, pulling apart. (woman humming) Okay. So it's not the earth which is weight, this is squeezing and pulling and shaking. And then (inhales and exhales loudly). (ass slaps) (woman humming) So notice what's happening in the body after I slapped her. There's something's happening in the body, I'm just staying. So I'm allowing whatever I'm doing to be received. When I'm holding workshops, (exhales loudly) when I'm holding workshops one of the things that I see with people is that they do too much, you know, so you can do much less and there's so much effect in so many things happening. (slapping) (woman humming) Yes. (woman humming) Okay. Also don't hit the same place but you can, for example, go between the ass cheeks. Darling, let's have a code of communication. So if you like what I'm doing and I can go even harder you can say green. Mm-hmm. If I kind of like hit your limit, you can say yellow. Mm-hmm. And if it's too much, you can say red. Mm-hmm. Okay. So we have a communication like a traffic light. Okay? So I'm gonna slap you again and just tell me if it's green, yellow, or red. Okay. Can I slap you a bit harder than before? Yes. Okay. Would you like me to slap you with harder than before? Yes. Okay. So make sure that your recipient is breathing because if they're holding their breath and their body's tensed, don't hit them. So I like to call it, don't hit dead bodies. Make sure that the person is alive, the person is breathing, you can ask them to move a little bit to just check your body, a little bit babe. So it means that they're not in a freeze response. Okay. They are in control over their body and they can move their body and you can also ask for verbal consent 'cause once they include the verbal abilities it means that their mind and the verbal parts are engaged as well. So, darling, would you like to hit you a bit stronger? Yeah, all right. Yes. Yes? Okay. Okay. (exhales loudly) And breathe. (slaps) (woman humming) Green. Green. Okay. So really allow and guys, you know whatever I'm telling her it's things that you can share with your partner as well. Okay. So allow the movement to be expressed through sounds, through breath and through movement. (exhales loudly) (ass slapping) (woman humming) Green. Green. Okay. (chuckles) So notice that you were probably expecting me to hit you out the cheek, but then I went for the thighs. Okay. So sometimes you can surprise somebody. Okay. You can kind of like hit other places as well. I just find them a bit less exciting make sure that you don't hit the lower back because this is where the kidneys are. Okay. So you want even more than that? Yes. Okay. Let's see what I can do. (woman chuckles) (slaps) (chuckles) (woman humming) Yes? Yes. So if you like what I'm saying, say yes. Yes. Yes. So green is good and yes is another, yes is one of the sexiest words in the English language. It's like, it just means, in any language, it means consent. It means invitation. It means keep doing what you're doing. (exhales loudly) So there's something I wanna share about this specific the fire element. When I had a little bit of a journey through that because when many years ago somebody told me that you can pull a woman's hair from her neck. I thought that was sick. I thought that was aggressive. I thought that was wrong, abusive and all of that stuff. And then I don't know, I decide to give it a try and I hardly met a woman who had a problem with that. Okay. Most women like that. So I was kind of like a soft kind of guy and I discovered that I can be intense with women as long as I'm feeling where they're at. As long as there's communication, as long as there's consent, you can share it. It's more intense ways of touching and relating in foreplay, in kissing, in sex. And this is a really beautiful thing to both express and receive. And many women told me, it's like, guys think I'm all fragile and stuff and they said, they're too soft with me and I want them to be a bit harder. There's also the BDSM world. BDSM being bondage, domination, submission, and sadomasochism. And I find it, many people in that industry, in that world sometimes get very attached to toys. So there's a lot of toys that you can use ropes, whips, pinwheels, and many other many other toys. And I find that it's okay if you wanna use them but seriously, it's like, your hands can do so much. You don't need any toys. This is the first thing. The second thing I wanted to say about that is don't get lost in the intensity. To be honest, I don't use this element so much and if I use it, it's very focused and it's kind of like, it has the purpose of expressing this but I don't want to be too intense for too long, okay. 'Cause if you're too intense for too long in some ways in the beginning you're waking up the body but afterwards the body gets a little bit armored. Okay. So the body might tense up or you might lose sensitivity to the subtle sensations. Okay. So one of my teachers, Sasha Cobra talks about the power of the subtle. We're gonna get there literally in a minute or two. So if you just go hard, if you fuck hard, if you finger hard the woman doesn't feel the subtle movements anymore. And you're not feeling the subtle sensations and the subtle movement that her body is doing, okay? So just play with this a little bit and then make sure that you are also playing with all of the other elements as well. So, darling, I'd like you to turn around again. Hm. (woman panting) (heavy breathing) Yes, breath inside, Yes, breath inside, Breath inside. (heavy breathing) Yes. Let your body do what it wants to do. (woman groaning) I'm just gonna explain what I'm doing on you, you keep dancing. (woman groaning) So you can start by rubbing your hands. I don't personally don't do it so much but many people recommend to do it. Cause that's kind of like charges your hands and then you start connecting to your super powers that I like to call human powers. So if you understand, or if you believe that you are not just a physical body but there's energy around your body and around her body, there's things that you can do with this energy. So you can, you can visualize that you're shooting, you know, heat, love air, sorry, heat, love, pleasure, orgasm, electricity, whatever it works for you through your hands. You can visualize that she has a layer of gas or fluid or whatever around her body. And you're just moving that around and playing with that. You can visualize that she's, like a puppet on a... a dole on the string, a puppet on a string and you're pulling the strings in order to move her. So let's see how this looks like and feels like. Invite the recipient. Just allow your body to do what it wants to do. (heavy breathing) (woman moaning) Yes. (woman moaning) (heavy breathing) Yes. So, relax your lips. Just keep making sounds (woman moaning) Just allow the natural sounds to come out. Yes. (heavy breathing) So you go generally again on the middle of the body you can also go around the body, but make sure that you're going on the middle of the body as well. Focusing on stops along the way. You know, genitals, belly, middle of the chest, throat third eye and crown. So all of the chakras, all of the energy it centers. If you don't believe in this stuff, don't worry about it. All right, hello We make the birds. The birds are singing with you. And you can literally visualize as if you're touching the body. (heavy breathing) So, I'm feeling about the, in my hand as if it's actually in my hand. (woman moaning) Yes, Yes (both moaning) (woman coughing) So whenever you're breathing out just allow the regular breath in there. So don't stick your tongue out because it's like you're diffusing the energy a little bit. It's like you are vomiting it out. Okay. So just keep going with the sound. And if the sound wants to be stronger, let it be stronger. (both moaning) So guys, another thing that you can do is to get close to the body and start feeling when your hands start to tingle. Okay, you can do this with your own hands as well. Wow, you can do this first with your hands so you can charge your hand if you want, you can bring your hands closer and feel when there's a little bit of a tingling in your hands, feeling like magnetic repulsion, and you can also do this with your partner's body. So you bring the hands close and then starting to feel a certain kind of electricity, tingling, goosebumps any kind of sensation that's a bit different. And then (heavy breathing) Just keep making the sound Yes, yes (woman moaning) So, this ether element is basically touching without touching and you might have a part of your mind telling you, you know, it's not real it's fake, you know, she's just faking it or whatever. So the question is, do you wanna believe that it's real or do you wanna believe that it's fake? For me I prefer it to believe that it's real. And sometimes you can say it's like the proof is in the pudding which means you can see that there's something is happening. So even if she's imagining it and even if I'm imagining it just by moving my hands above her body, it's like something might be happening. And if something might be happening this is all which is important. Okay. So it's not important if it's real or not real, what is important is if it's something is happening or not. So put your rational mind aside and just allow yourself to play like a kid. To have superpowers, to, you know to go into the Harry Potter world and have magic, you know, have magic powers. So yeah. (woman moaning) (both moaning) So the thing you do afterwards is just withdrawing your hands and just allowing her to be in her experience. (moaning softly) So I'm just here by you baby and I just trust that you are, your totally okay even without me touching you. (moaning softly) So are you are holding yourself. You were being held by yourself. (moaning softly) Yes. (moaning softly) (moaning softly) Yeah. (moaning softly) Yes (moaning softly) Yes. Go into it, go into it. (moaning) Yes baby. (moaning continues) Yes, go into it. (moaning continues) Yes. (moaning continues) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning continues) Yes. (moaning continues) Yes. (moaning continues) Yes baby. (laughing) (moaning continues) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Feel the activation of the five elements in your body and in your being. (moaning) Supporting you with whatever element you already have activated and charging you inspiring you. Initiating you with whatever element that you are missing, yearning for or triggered by. (soft slaps) (moaning) (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes (moaning) Yes baby. Go into it. (moaning continues) Let yourself go into it. (moaning) Just a little bit to keep the breath and the sound going. (moaning) So, after the same breath and the sound. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes baby. (moaning) Yes baby. (moaning) Yes. Yes. (moaning) Yes, go into it. Go into it. Go into it. (moaning) Yes baby, go into it. (moaning) Yes. Exactly the same. Keep doing exactly the same. (moaning) Yes baby. (moaning) Yes. Yes. (moaning) Yes. Yes. Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Effortlessly going deeper and higher. Yes. (moaning) Yes, let the energy take you. Let the energy take you. (moaning) Yes baby. (moaning) Yes, let the energy take you. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes, go into it. (moaning) Allow it to intensify. (moaning) Allow it to intensify. Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. Yes. (moaning continues) Yes, yes. Your body knows what to do. Yes. (moaning) Your body knows what to do. Yes. (moaning) Yes baby. Yes. (moaning) Yes baby. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. And bring it from your heart into your pussy. From your heart into your pussy. Feel how these energies penetrating your pussy. How you're drawing it into your pussy. (moaning softly) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning continues) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning continues) Yes. Remembering it's you, it's your energy. I haven't been doing anything for a few minutes. (moaning) It's just your energy. And your connection to Shakti, to energy to, everything that you wish for. Your connection to the five elements and one of manifestation. (breathing softly) (moaning softly) Yes. Okay. (breathing softly) So if you wish to and totally just if you wish to, you can share a few words about how you're feeling and how this experience was for you. If not, I can just do, show something, and then you can speak in a few minutes. It's very empowering especially the last part. What was empowering about the last part? Feeling my own energy and also feeling a little bit that I tend to cut her. I cut myself from that and just remembering that she's always there and it's pleasures, its gasping, it's yeah, it's me. Beautiful. Which is there any element that you preferred more than others that you really enjoy then? I really love the air, I mean because I don't do that a lot. Very gentle touch, and I love all the elements. I love the water because it's very sensual and that's the space of the womb. I love the fire. I love all the elements because I can find the different parts of me that I want to express. Yeah. Beautiful And I like feeling your whole body weight on me. That's really nice. Was there anything challenging, triggering, uncomfortable? Yeah, going into the pleasure more and more. That's the most triggering part. I could feel my art old patterns wanted to like cut it, like cut yeah, stop, stop, stop. And so it was really important that you kept inviting me to go deeper cause I could feel my miles like, go somewhere else, go somewhere else, go somewhere else. They're like, no, stay in the body, (mumbles). Yeah, so this is a really good you know, thing for guys to hear that even the woman who's totally comfortable with the body and with her genitals and with expressing all of this on camera and you know, very orgasmic and stuff like still have, you know, this thing about going into her pleasure. And this is something that I've seen with many, many women, you know, that they want pleasure but they're cutting their pleasure short. So you as the man, you know, there's feeling of like, oh, it's like, it's too much. Am I deserving of so much pleasure. Maybe it's wrong to have pleasure. All of this christian thing about, you know sexuality sex is the original sin. And really it's like fear of pleasure, pleasure feeling like it's too much, too strong, too intense, feeling like afraid to lose consciousness, to faint, not being in control, basically. So, you as the space holder, it's like you keep saying yes and you keep affirming her pleasure and notice that a lot of the times I was just saying, yes, yes, yes. I was breathing together with her. I was inviting her to stay in her body. Okay, so this is in some ways it's advanced stuff I'm doing it as a sexual healer in a sexual coach with people in sessions. And there's obviously different cues that I'm feeling, that I'm noticing. Okay, so one thing to share with you is that notice if a woman is going on kind of like a pleasure wave and suddenly she's cutting it short, doing something else, suddenly he wants to talk, okay. Suddenly he wants to stop. That might be an expression of hair reaching kind of like a ceiling or glass ceiling of pleasure in not being able to go beyond that, stopping herself. Okay, so just support her and you just not telling her what to do but just inviting her to stay, to go back into the pleasure and to keep expressing it. Just to repeat the elements again on your beautiful belly, which I love so much. Just cause it's soft skin it's, so air element, tips of the fingers, very, very light touch, using materials, using air, using hair. Okay, so that's the air. Water is all of the surface of the skin but without pushing into the body, long movements, circular movements, continuous movements, earth, maybe, well, let's see on the belly. Yeah, I can do on the belly as well. Okay, so going into the body gradual, slow, and obviously on areas like thighs and fleshy areas really going into the body, putting your weight on fire. Yeah, fire is related to the belly as well. Yeah, yeah. If it's funny, if it's delicious, you know, breathe, laugh, make sounds, okay. Doing this, going back to the thigh. So slapping, pinching, squeezing, shaking, biting as well. And all this shaking things is also the fire and then the ether touching without touching make sure that you really don't touch. I see some people in workshop and they literally they go on the skin. No, don't touch the skin. Okay, so then imagining that you are shooting energy or even better, you know what? Maybe not imagining so much but really feeling the energy of the person and then feeling how your hands moving, literally moving the energy and connecting with the energy. Okay, so this is, these are the five elements.(coughs) You will find that you might have a better connection with some elements that are easy for you to express. Other elements are difficult for you to express. So, or maybe your partner tells you, you know, it's like, oh I know what the, you know, what the element is and you're still doing something that feels like earth, you know. So you're not really watery. Okay, and you might find a connection to your life. So you might be missing one of the elements in your life. So let's say you're missing softness or you're missing sensuality. So let's say you're very passionate lover, very intense lover but you're missing this soft sensual water and maybe airy elements and maybe you're also missing it in your life. So, you're not nurturing yourself so much. It's always about intensity and plans and vision boards and goals and projects, and so on, fire and doing and it's not so much about taking the time to relax and enjoy and have fun without actually doing anything totally relaxing, okay. So, see how the elements connect to your life and yet by giving it, by sharing it with your partner, you're also being initiated into this element and I would really recommend as well that you ask your partner to do this for you. Okay, so don't just give. I was stuck in a dynamic of giving for many, many years. So yes, I became a sexual healer, coach, educator, all of this stuff. But I literally stop myself from receiving cause I, my story was like, oh, I'm okay with just giving. I don't need to receive. It's by giving that I receive. I enjoy your pleasure, all of this stories. But actually I was depleted cause I was stopping myself from receive. I'm doing a bit better in the past few years and I still have a journey to go with receiving. Okay, so make sure that it's reciprocal maybe not in the same moment. So maybe your partner just wants to relax and enjoy the state and she will give you, you know an hour later or a day later. Okay, but really make sure that you do it balanced and you're not just in a giving role. So yeah. This is the five elements, sensual touch, explore this as an exercise by itself, integrated into full play, into lovemaking, into kissing, into even casual touch of touching your partner's friend at the restaurant. You can hold a hand, just a hand and you can do the five elements to each other just with that. So enjoy that, explore that and I'll see you in the next lesson. So we are going deeper. We are going closer to the body. We are approaching, going closer to the yoni, and not reaching the yoni yet. And before we go any further, I wanna remind you of something that we talked about in a previous video, which is the two aspects of serving and, let's say, not serving, serving and taking. So what we're doing is specifically about serving the woman, serving your partner, touching her for her pleasure, for her benefit. The other way to touch would be to take, okay? So I can touch her for her pleasure, to serve her, and I can also touch her for my pleasure, and many times, people mix those two. It's really good to be really clear about when you are serving another person and when you are taking from them. It's totally okay to take pleasure, so it's totally okay, with your partner's consent, to touch her in a way that you feel pleasure, to feel her breasts, her ass, her face, her pussy, whatever it is, in a way that gives you pleasure. This is not a part so much of what we're doing here. What we're doing here is mainly about serving, but I wanna bring that up so you have an experience, you have an exercise of asking for consent from your partner to touch her for your pleasure, 'cause then it brings stuff, it puts stuff on the table, puts stuff on consciousness, put stuff in consent so you both know that you're touching her for your pleasure in, again, in another situation, and also your partner can touch you for her pleasure, okay? Instead of trying to jerk you off, pleasure you, whatever, it's like she can just enjoy your body. So it's a very, very beautiful thing to... It's actually a gift, okay? So if I'm letting my partner touch me for her pleasure, I'm giving her the gift of access to my body, and this is part of a bigger body of work which is called the wheel of consent. I'm going to put a link later in the bottom of this email, in the bottom of this video, under this video, for the School of Consent. Very, very deep work. There's a lot of layers to it. Very transformational. So when you are touching, make sure that you are touching for the person's, for the recipient's, for the woman's pleasure, and you can also ask for feedback and ask, "Are you enjoying this? "Please say yes if you're enjoying this." And there's also another kind of aspect to it where touching her for her service and her pleasure actually meets your pleasure. So you are serving her, but still enjoying her in the same time, so secondarily enjoying her in the same time. Later, I might do another video, another program about really finding that meeting, so how you can really tune into a woman's body, pleasure her, orgasm her and so on, and also enjoy it for your own pleasure. That's kinda like a much deeper level of work and awareness, so for now, we kind of like making it simple with you pleasuring her. What we'll be sharing now is breast massage, breast touch, breast healing, remembering that it's not just massage what we're doing. Massage sometimes feels a bit limited. And this is something that you can do by itself. You can do this as a session by itself. You can also do this as part of a yoni massage experience. You can also do this as part of sex. So part of foreplay, you can also touch a woman's breasts, obviously, and during sex as well. This is something which is, which can be very, very meaningful, because many women had their breasts touched in a way that doesn't really serve them, doesn't really pleasure them, and maybe they wanted to be touched, but they were not ready to be touched yet. So literally most, if not all women that I talk with usually say that they were touched, as I said in an earlier video and it bears repeating, they were touched too early, too fast, too strong, okay? They were kissed too early, too fast, too strong. They had their pussy touched too early, too fast, too strong. So this is something to bring back the gradual touch, the healing touch, the pleasurable touch, and also this is a really good opportunity for you to learn how to touch her, how to pleasure her in a way that shows you how to feel, shows you how to sense, shows you how to communicate with her as well. Another aspect of healing is that, and just as a reminder, we're talking in this program about pleasure, healing, and power, so it's not just about pleasuring. It's also about healing. It's really important to not just be attached to the pleasure, but also see that there are some strong emotions that can come up, trauma, inadequacy, feeling not good enough, and this is something that specifically comes in breast massage because many, many women have issues with their breasts. Their breasts are not as they want them to look like. Society gives us very, very, kind of like one-sided, narrow depictions of women's breasts. Usually it's like, in porn, you see women with huge breasts, many times fake breasts, and all of them, all of the social epidemic of breast implants is something that is influenced by that as well, so women feel that they have to adhere to a certain kind of standard of how big breasts should look like. So they put breast implants, silicone implants in their breasts, which is really, really not healthy. And also what happens to women a lot is that they didn't feel comfortable with their breasts, and then they put breast implants, so their breasts look better in some way, but then they still don't feel comfortable with their breasts because their breasts, they're now fake, and there's a whole issue around that. I'm a little bit of an activist to get women to love and accept their breasts and their body as they are, for people to accept their bodies as they are, so men and women. If you, as a woman watching this, you have breast implants, or if you as a man, your partner is having breast implants, let's accept that. This is what the reality is right now, and the breast massage would be about bringing more sensation, more pleasure, and also a kind of integration for the woman with her breasts, because many women who have breast implants have a little bit of dissociation from her breasts. Be gentle with breast implants. So specifically, don't be too rough with them so you don't rupture them. And if you're a woman watching this, I'll put the link to my book, "Orgasm Unleashed: "Your Guide to Pleasure, Healing, and Power," which also includes exercises in how to connect to your own breasts, which is really, really good to do apart from what you're doing here with your partner. Another aspect is women with relatively small breasts, and again, this is small breasts in comparison to what society shows us that is kind of like the standard. So our beautiful model here, Alishka, has small breasts, so this is something to acknowledge. This is something to work with. This is something to celebrate, and many women that I've talked with and made love with had issues with the fact that they had small breasts. So by having, doing this massage and this experience, this session is something that brings back the connection and allows you as a man to love, worship, show appreciation to her breasts, and builds more pleasure. So this breast massage also builds more pleasure, although women with small or smaller breasts are relatively more sensitive than women with bigger breasts, okay? To begin with, when they start their sexual explorations, conscious sexuality, tantra and all of this, they're usually a little bit more sensitive. Is that true for you as well, love? Mm-hmm, yes. Yeah? So I've met, made love with, had sessions with women with big breasts, and they had less sensitivity, and maybe it's because the sensitivity is spread over a big area, okay? Maybe that's one explanation for that, but just so you know that any woman, regardless of her breast size, even if she has really big breasts, can build sensitivity through breast massage and through self-breast massage as well, and also through some practices that you can do with your orgasm. This is also healing, and healing sounds like there's a problem, but let's say this is preventing issues with your breast in some way. So regular breast massage, if you do it, the woman does it for herself, if you as a man do this for your partner, it's a very healing and, in some way, preventative thing to do. So it brings blood flow, brings energy, brings touch, awareness, pleasure, which is also medicinal, to all of the parts of the breast so there's less risk of breast cancer and other issues with the breast. A side note: I think that breast... I'm pretty sure that breast cancer is the most prevalent, most common cancer for women, which basically says something about women's connection to their breasts and to their heart. For men, by the way, it's prostate cancer, which, again, shows something about men's connection to their genitals and to their sexuality. So that was a side note. Breast massage, so brings pleasure, brings healing, brings empowerment, brings connection between you and your partner, teaching you how to touch her breasts beyond what you or, let's say, other guys, not you, but other guys have been doing. So this thing that I said a few times before, and I'm gonna repeat it again, that men, in some ways, attack women's breasts. They go too fast, too strong to a woman's breasts. They only focus on the nipples and they're not aware of all of the areas around. So it will teach you how to touch better, and it would heal some of the touch that a woman has received that wasn't amazing. Alishka, love, you have something to add or share or something around that? Mm. Okay. You're like, "Stop talking and start touching my breasts." Cool. (Alishka laughs) Cool. Okay, so if you wanna just take this and... So Alishka and I had agreed already that this session is only about her breasts, maybe touching a little bit of the body as well, but it's not about the genitals. We are focusing only on the breasts, and that's something really, really healing and really safe for a woman to know that we're not going anywhere else. And you can totally receive, totally relax into receiving touch in this specific area of your body, okay? Also, you don't need to perform. You don't need to orgasm. You don't need to... It's beautiful if you make sounds and breathe and so on, but there's no goal for this, okay? It's not like, I dunno, five orgasms or your money back or something. (Alishka laughs) I'm happy to pleasure you, but, and pleasure is one of the intentions that we have, pleasure, healing, and empowerment, but it's not a master. It's not a goal. It's just something really nice to experience. Okay? Thank you. Thank you. So we'll be starting without oil, and that's another thing, another reason that I don't always call it massage. So people are very much attached to using oil, and I'm saying, it's like, let's see how we can touch the breasts, and then in other sessions, the rest of the body without oil, and then, yeah, there are some things that we can only do with oil. I'm using coconut oil here in this hot climate. Coconut oil is very easy to work with. In other location, you can use, in more cold climates, you can use almond oil, grapeseed oil. Basically any oil which is edible and you can eat it, you can drink it, it's also okay to put it on the skin. So yeah, let's see how this is done. So Alishka, darling, may I touch your breasts for, as a service to you? Yes, please. Thank you. I invite you to touch my breast for my own pleasure in receiving. Thank you. So feel the meaning, the energy of that. You're not allowing me, you're not just giving me access for my pleasure, but you're really inviting me and asking me to serve you, okay? (both breathing deeply) Yes. Yes. So you notice that I put my hand, and I don't do anything. I just keep it here. And this is really, really important. It's a reminder that whenever you go somewhere, you start something, just stay there. Just let the woman feel. Let yourself feel. So before doing anything, just pause. So I took some time before touching, and then when I touch, I just... I can even remove the hand and she would still feel my hand. So it's good to start with the air touch. And if you want, you can watch again the video of the five elements. So this is a really good it's always a really good element to start with. And make sure that you really avoid the nipples. In the beginning, you can literally just go on the upper chest even before going to the breasts. Remembering that a woman's pleasure arousal start from her chest and her heart. You can go down to the belly button, maybe a little bit to the lower belly but not anywhere lower than that. So most of the focus is here. Making sure that the woman is breathing. If she's not breathing, you breathe to remind her to breathe. I'm just going with light touch airy touch either with the tips of the fingers or the back of my hand, which has hair on it. It's still very light avoiding the nipples. So I'm hinting and the nipples I know that they're there by avoiding them, it gives her a message that I know exactly where they are. Kind of like going in figure eights around the breasts. Remember that you don't have to do exactly what I'm doing here. This is not a routine I don't teach with routines I teach attitudes, reminders, approaches, you know, so you can just do what, you can mix a little bit what I'm doing, as long as you start, you start softer. So this is something that I recommend always starting soft and avoiding the nipples. How does this feel there? Very nice. So I'm just putting my hand on the bra line. This is a really good again, area or line or place. You can be gently squeezing the skin, pushing into the skin very very gently. Some women, especially if they have issues with their breasts, disconnection, sexual trauma will have pains in their breasts, and then you have to be gentle, but also communicate with them that it's really good to work on this in order to dissolve the pain. (both breathing loudly) So what I'm doing here is and I would have been holding it even much longer but I just wanna repeat to show you and to talk you through that. So very gently I'm grabbing the breast. And by the way, with women with large breasts you would kind of like, well, let's say if they are a bit older or after breastfeeding if the breasts are kind of like spilling to the sides, you would kind of like collect the breasts from the side and take it up and lift it a little bit up. So it's a movement that comes from down upwards, okay? So on from the sides toward inwards, okay? So this. And then I'm holding an I am, I'm not exactly squeezing, but my hand is not flat. Okay, it's not this. So I'm slightly, let's say very light, slightly holding the breast. And again, women with small breasts, you would need to get your hand to envelop the whole breast. So it's like your hand is being a bra for her. You're holding her and you're making sure that you're not pressing any of your fingers, let's say I'm going to press my finger, my index finger, so you can see now that I'm pressing into the skin, don't do that, okay? So just very lightly. It's like it's light but a bit firm if that makes sense. So it's not strong, it's not rough. It's not squeezing yet, might do that later. It's just holding. So I'm holding and I'm slightly lifting upwards, do it like this lifting upwards thing? And then I'm just resting, I'm just pausing. I'm just feeling. I'm holding you darling. (both moaning) Well Liska, how does it feel for you this movement of holding, grabbing, collecting your breasts? So nurturing and pleasurable. Thank you. So you can choose if you do one breast at a time or you can also by positioning yourself you can hold, collect both breasts. And by the way, for I'm doing a lot of things on, or I'm doing this whole thing on a mattress in this program but you can also buy a massage table and do some of the exercises that we do on a massage table. In my private sessions, my paid sessions are actually mostly on massage tables. And that's then you don't have to crouch and your legs don't go numb. So that's a possibility. So let's see both breasts together. So I'm collecting them, holding them, cupping them. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. (moaning) Yes. Notice that I'm saying yes every time she makes a sound. So I'm (clears throat) supporting, affirming the fact that she's making a sound so then she'd be making more sounds. Notice that her left nipple that we spent more time on is a little bit more erect a little bit darker than her right nipple that we didn't work on so much, okay? So even with just a few minutes of just holding the nipple, there's already more blood flow, more circulation, more energy here rather than here. And what Liska shared a few minutes ago was, you know, I want you to touch my other breast as well. So we can kind of like equalize that, bring more awareness here, and by the way it doesn't have to be exact like this. So you can do this with this hand as well, it's also okay. I used to be really attached to everything being symmetric and do everything from one side and then from the other side of the body, but I relaxed. So this also feels okay, although it's yeah, okay. (moaning) So this is more of relating to the elements in earth, very gentle earth touch. So I'm just holding, the earth is stable. (moaning) Sometimes it's like I was squeezing very very gently or you know but very very stable. So when you holding a stable touch she has the opportunity to feel into whatever is going on. (moaning) And also it's like, I'm feeling how her breast is feeling in my hand. So I'm aware of the skin and the flesh, the sensations and nipple. (moaning) Yes please. (both moaning) This is something that some of the sessions you can also do from here. Just find whatever position works for you and also change positions if you need. My legs go numb, I have a relatively slow circulation. So I need to change positions as you would see. So that's totally okay. When you change position, notice that you're not bumping into her, you know, so be really aware of your body because if suddenly you're bumping into her thigh, she would get a little bit contracted. So really be aware of where your body is. Also that is not something that is tickling her, you know? So if I have my shirt here and it's it's here though and maybe it's nice, but maybe it's also, maybe it's also tickling and taking her out of focus on her body. So we're continuing with the touch and now we're going into let's say very gentle fire. So we are, you know what, lets see. So we did air, we did air. I'm doing one too. (moaning) So all of the surface of the skin on all of the surface of her skin. (moaning) (both moaning) (moaning) So again, just building sensation, creating sensation, bringing sensation during this rotary sliding movements all around. So we did, we did air, we held with the earth a little bit were doing water element and then we're going into slightly, very gently squeezing the breasts. You can do both of them in the same time. So it's kinda like, it's kinda like doing this. Okay, that's the, (moaning) How does this feel there? I love it. You love it? If there's something that you particularly love, would you tell me? I do that a bit longer? Yes. I don't know it's coming though. (chuckles) Yeah well. Everything I love. (chuckles) Again, this is a gentle, it's more like a massage like movement. Okay, so squeezing mostly with the whole surface of my hand. Sometimes you can go more towards the fingers. So although I am touching the nipple, notice that I'm not manipulating the nipple too much. It's just including it in whatever I'm doing. We'll get specifically to the nipple later. So I'm pressing the nipple with a very, very very wide touch, so it's less sharp. (both moaning) You can also, so there's two ways to touch the skin. One of them is to slide on the skin and then, okay, so it looks like this, okay? So I'm sliding on the skin. Another one is to hold the skin and to move, move the skin. So I'm staying the same point. Okay, so these are two ways to touch the skin. And it's good if you do both of them. So one of them is sliding and another one is just grabbing and like massaging this area. Same thing with this. (both moaning) (moaning) Notice that the breasts are all this area. So the breasts are here underneath and the breast also here they start, the breast tissue actually starts from here, okay? (both moaning) Just under the breast bones. Are these the breast bones? (chuckles) (moaning) (birds chirping) Specifically for women with large breasts, a lot of times they wound have pains in this area, but not just, (moaning) (moaning) (birds chirping) (both moaning) (moaning) (birds chirping) Then we can go a bit deeper and still without oil, there's a, it's a different feeling if you're doing it with or without oil. Cause once you put oil your hands would slide, okay? They would glide over the skin. Now that we don't have oil, they're still a little bit more friction. So we can do this a little bit without oil. (moaning) Okay, so see how this feels without oil. Same thing on the other side (moaning) (moaning softly) And then we're gonna apply oil. (both moaning) So I'm using a bottle which is like the bottles you take for flights, okay? It's quite safe in terms of it doesn't spill so easily, it's very easy to open and close. You can also use a container, but then if a woman is starting to get really aroused and excited, and throwing her hands around, okay, she will, I promise you, she will knock the oil off or you will knock the oil off while you're moving. So this is what I'm using. It's really good to pour the oil over, specifically in cold climates into your body, into your hand first. And you can, heat the oil a little bit in your hands. It's also nice to spill oil directly into the person, into their body, you might see that later. (moaning softly) So also how you apply the oil, should be nice, sensual, sensitive. (moaning softly) And also using this circular, water movements. (moaning) (moaning softly) So notice there's just enough oil that I can glide effortlessly. If you put too much oil just start moving it to the upper belly, that's okay. Make sure that you don't put too much oil so the person doesn't drown in oil, okay? So then I'm repeating some of the previous movements but then it's easier for me to go into the skin, into the flesh. So one of the things that you can do is to do this movement with your fingers and a little bit with your thumbs as well. So this gives a really, its like gets to all of the tissue. This is something that you do after you already warmed up the breast tissue. (moaning) So I'm really massaging, going all around, slightly compressing, compressing the flesh, so I can press against it. Okay if you're not getting some of these details don't worry about it, okay? Don't worry about any details in this program. Just do what you feel, discover new things, ask for feedback okay, and keep playing with this. Some women will be too tender to do this especially in the first session and then it might take you a few sessions to get to this level of pressing into the breasts. How does this feel there? (moaning softly) (mumbles) Amazing. (moaning softly) So this might not feel erotic, sensual, orgasmic and sometimes it wouldn't be, so it just would be healing and you know bringing blood flow and so on. Maybe even a bit painful, you know, there's a bit of tenderness there, yeah? But overall you bringing more awareness again more pleasure, more blood flow, more pleasure, I said pleasure again. Okay, more pleasure, third time, to the breasts so later there will be more pleasure. I literally had one woman in particular and also other women that said something similar. Like after a breast massage, she held her breasts and she said, "Wow, it doesn't feel like my breasts. "They feel totally charged, totally alive." It's like, so 20, 30 minutes of breast massage can really, really make a difference. So continuing with this movement. So I'm really squeezing, (moaning) this is another kind of like another stroke that you can do. So I'm doing this, its like a bread think, think that her breast is like bread or bread dough. Yeah, so you're working with the dough. Sorry that I'm objectifying you as dough but you're such sexy dough. (moaning) (moaning softly) So I'm also looking for areas which are a bit tight and then I can work on them a little bit. If a woman has a point, a part in her breast which is too lumpy and too painful, she can go and you know have herself checked at the doctors. Just make sure you ask for five different opinions before, you know, if any doctor tells to cut anything, you know, it's like ask for five different opinions. (moaning softly) So I'm doing the same thing from the, (clears throat) from the other direction. (soft moaning) (moaning) (moaning ) What's the sensational feeling, pleasure? Like a liveliness, Mm. Before it was more grounding. (moaning softly) So now you can say it's more of fire elements. So although there's, let's say there's a few elements actually mixed together but because it's, (moaning softly) you can say it's partly also fire. And they love it so much. Hmm yeah. (moaning softly) So what I'm doing over this side is I'm doing with my thumbs and basically doing this. Okay, I'm using my thumbs, 'cause that's where I'm reaching here, but I'm doing this and they feel a little bit different. Okay, so on my side, there's a bit of lumpiness there, that we're working through. Here it's a bit more homogenous, yeah, like soft. And here, here, feel this? (moaning softly) (breathing heavily) So if there's any pain, anything, just to keep expressing that. Lets see if you have this here. (moaning softly) Feel this?. (moaning loudly) Okay. (moaning) So another thing you can do is, this kind of like swiping motions. Again it's an aspect of collecting, stretching. So what I'm trying to do with her breasts is basically to stretch it in all directions, okay? Down, up and to the sides. So this is what we're doing here. (moaning softly) Can do the same thing from down upwards, and from our downwards. If it's too, some women's nipples would be really very sensitive, especially around menstruation, so, find how you can go around or just avoid some strokes. (moaning softly) You okay with the, yeah, I think you're okay. (moaning) So I haven't put oil in a while, but I'm still sliding. Is that still feels okay for you? Yeah. So I usually, I don't use much oil, I use as little as possible. Just make sure that there's enough oil, so you don't have so much friction on the skin. Okay, so we have that, we can also do circular movements. (moaning softly) And it's kind of like really compressing and squeezing the breasts inwards. And it's like, all of these movements, most of these movements is stuff that women never received before in their life, maybe they didn't even give this to themselves. Okay, it's like you don't, you may go to a Swedish massage, or deep tissue massage, this is deep tissue, but they don't go to these tissues, and nobody will touch your breasts. So, it's really good to share this with your partner. Same thing with the groin that we'll be going through later. (moaning) (moaning softly) (moaning loudly) Yes. Yes. Yes. (mumbles) (moaning) So sometimes it's really good to pause, and also you're not doing anything. So you can either pause with holding or pause without holding, so, a woman can feel how her body feels like after, (moaning softly) some of what we were doing. (moaning softly) How do your breasts feel? How do you feel? They're energetic and moving, I feel a lot of movements, Instructor: Mm hmm. I feel grounded, I feel hell, yeah, nobody's ever moved the breast in that way. Instructor: Mm. Very nourished. Hmm, beautiful. And open. Hmm. So we kind of like included the nipple as part of the whole touch, so the touch was going over the nipple as well. Now we can go more directly over the nipple. Again, careful some women will be so sensitive that they wouldn't be able to bear this so, is this okay with you darling? Woman: Uh huh. So one thing that I discovered a few years ago is that apart from squeezing nipples you can also push nipples into the body, and it's much easier to work with them, by pushing them into the body. So I'm pushing into a nipple and also moving it around a little bit. I generally like counter-clockwise movements, but, the other way is also okay. I can also, pull a little bit. (moaning softly) This is like you can call it a juicer. I'm feeling like, the breast is more sensitive. Hmm. So I'm doing just a little bit of this, this is like direct nipple stimulation. Okay, so this is the most focused on pleasure that we had until now. And you can do this, although this is not just the only focus of this. So after you've, so the nipples, the energy of the nipples in the stimulation, I just did this very sharp. So then I spread it around the breast. I bring this sensitivity, pleasure, stimulation all around the breasts again. (moaning) (moaning loudly) (moaning softly) (moaning loudly) Touch your breasts and you'd feel how they feel. Tell me how that is. I feel my heart beat racing right now. Instructor: Mm, beautiful. Even without touching. (moaning) They feel bigger. Mm. Soft. They feel a lot of love. Mm hmm. (moaning softly) (moaning) I'm glad I had a chance to serve you in this way specifically. Yeah. So this was the breast massage, and this is one option for the breast massage. You can do this for 10 minutes, 30 minutes or one hour, you can do the same strokes that I've done for much longer, you can find your own strokes. Women with different breasts would like different things, and you can also ask them to direct you, you know, it's like do this, do that, 'cause they touch themself in a certain way, and they wanna teach you how, so you can ask them you know, "Show me how you want to be touched as well." Important to really take your time, not rush, and allow space for integration. So if you're doing the session as a session by itself, really let your woman decompress, relax, integrate after the session, or you can do this as part of your only massage and then you go to the other parts of the body. So yeah, that's what we'll be doing in the next videos, and I'll see you there. I'm here as the teacher, holding space and having this program, teaching this program. And something to share with you is that I haven't always done this. I've learned how to do this. Many years ago, I've had one of my partners, I tried to give her a massage and it really wasn't working. She was saying, "Don't massage my bones. "Massage my muscles and my flesh." So I really didn't know how to give a massage. (Eyal clears throat) And even when I started giving yoni massage and sexual healing, one of my lovers, who was also a recipient of, she received a session from me and also she would give me feedback. She was herself a professional. And she said, "Eyal, your yoni massage is amazing "but your whole body massage, "you should practice a bit more." So it's constantly a journey of improvement and I'm constantly learning as well. So I'm sharing that with you. So wherever you at on the journey, whatever you can do, you start from wherever you at and then you become better. I'll be sharing with you a whole body massage which can be again, pleasurable, can be healing, can be therapeutic, can be empowering. And I'm sharing with you one way to do it and you can find your own way to do it. So it's more about your attitude, it's more about the approach and less about exactly what point or exactly what stroke or whatever. So notice that I've been saying it a few times throughout the program, don't worry about the details. Don't try to get it perfect. Don't try to do exactly what I do but find out your version, your feeling of how to do this. So the whole body massage is really, really good. As we said, for pleasure and healing. And as mammals, we need touch. It's really good for us as mammals to receive touch. And people who receive more touch, it releases endorphins, which are the feel good hormones, neurotransmitters. It's kinda like natural chemicals that make you feel good. So giving your partner a massage makes them feel good and also makes you feel good because you are touching and also touching is pleasurable. It's something that builds communication between the partners. It's something that opens pleasure, opens energy channels throughout the body. And it's really good. If you want to have a whole body orgasm, if you want your partner to have a whole body orgasm, make sure that you give her whole body touch. So let's explore one possible way on how to do a whole body massage. And I like to start with the person lying on their front. So darling if you wanna take off your clothes off and lie on your front. I'm just gonna remove this. I love your dimples. So fucking cute. So you notice I wait a little bit after she lied down, and then I approached very, very slowly. I placed my hand I was feeling the temperature, skin, texture, just resting. And then I'm having my hand on her lower back sacrum. Just rocking her. Notice that I keep using the same approaches that I was sharing with you in the sensual hug exercise. So this is creating rhythm, repetition. How does it feel like to be rocked like this babe? I'm melting again. You're melting and the wind is picking up. Nice. So you can rock from here from the sacrum and you can also do this from here as well. And it's very light movement, okay? I don't have to pull. It's just finding the natural rhythm that the body has and everybody has a slightly different rhythm. So I'm just doing this and the body is coming back the other way. And notice that a lot of the things that I'm showing you here are effortless. You do it from the other side as well by pushing. And this is something which is relaxing and it can also be very arousing. There's always this combination between relaxing and arousing, because when you're relaxed, you can be more aroused. And when you're aroused, it's good to relax and then you become more aroused. So I'm using the water element, touch. You can also do air touch, also okay. So before we apply oil, it's good to go over the body and just give touch to the whole body. Caressing. My hand is gliding very, very light, whole surface of the skin. So it's kind of like a preparation to the oil. Yes? This is another form of hinting so I'm getting close to the breasts. Close to her yoni but without touching her yoni. And also this massage can be without genitals and it can be with genitals. So in this exercise we're gonna explore without genitals and then in the next exercise we're gonna add that as well. And it's really good to communicate to your partner if you're going to include genitals or not. And again, for this exercise both of them are okay. Depends on what you prefer. It's natural to have this as part of a whole session of a yoni massage. So when I was doing more massage and bodywork, yeah for sure I would give a whole body massage and then go towards the yoni massage. So in this case I'm starting from the neck and shoulders. Sometimes I'm starting from the feet. Some massage practitioners and body workers like to start from the feet. They say it's grounding. I personally find that both of them work. So without going into much technicalities, the main thing is to bring touch and a little bit of pressure to all of the body. Okay? A little bit of squeezing everywhere, a little bit of pushing into, a little bit of stretching. If you just do that, you will give a great massage. Don't worry about the pressure points and pressure lines and whatever, okay? So just let your body, let your hands explore the shape of the body, where the bones are, where the muscles are. Okay? And also go by the feedback of your partner. So darling, just tell me if something feels really nice and I do it a bit longer, okay? So I'm working on the neck and shoulders. This whole area, squeezing the neck and go a little bit towards the hair, tracing along the bone, you can trace along this bone as well, going on the other side. And I'm kinda like pooling and lifting. I'm kinda like doing this. Stretching, lifting. (Eyal inhales and exhales) And don't help me move your body babe unless I ask, okay? Yeah. Just totally become mush. Under the shoulder. So I'm kinda like doing this under the shoulder. Other side. And some people insist with everything has to be symmetric. It's nice if it's generally balanced, but don't worry about it too much. You can get a massage table. Obviously with massage table it will be much easier for both of you, but it's totally okay to do this on a mattress and just keep, ask the recipient, suggest to the recipient to move their head side to side so they don't get sore. Armpit, might be ticklish for some. And using your thumbs to go into the flesh into the muscles. Circular movements, kind of like heart movements as well. So this is like this kind of movement. So we found the middle towards the side. So the main thing to remember is that you don't massage bones, you massage muscles and anything which is soft, okay? So you don't press on the spine. This is what I did 25 years ago with this girlfriend, okay? I was massaging her spine. Unless you are not a chiropractor and you know how to work with bones. But even by the way, if you are any kind of chiropractor, osteopath, even body worker, I would suggest forgetting about what you know and just finding the simple movement and also maybe the sensual movement. So I might be pressing a little bit on the spine but when I'm pressing strongly, it's always on both sides of the spine, not on the spine itself. So you can use your thumbs, you can use the base of your palms and make sure as much as possible that you're using your weight, not your muscles, okay? So it's not so much this, it's more this, okay? So just using the weight and just sliding with the weight, the weight of my arms. (Eyal inhales and exhales) You can go up from the middle, down from the sides. And then for the second stroke, I'll be using my, how do you say? The root of the palm, base of the palm. So the spine is in the middle. You can also do it going downwards. And notice I'm applying my weight. I'm just dragging my hands. So I've used very little oil. Now I'm feeling it starting to get a bit frictiony so I'm applying a bit more oil. Just apply enough oil so you don't have to apply all too often so you don't need to stop too often to apply oil. So some of the areas that are massaging are just to bring awareness to the body. It's not necessarily muscles or anything. It's just so we make sure that all of the body is touched. The waist are very nice to massage as well. Something I do feels nice just let yourself make a sound, say yes. It doesn't have to be orgasmic. It can just feel nice. So get into the habit of expressing your sounds. You can go upward in circles as well, which is also nice. And if you find any area which is a bit tender for the person, with their permission, you can ask them to apply more pressure there, to stay on this area, to work on it a little bit. So this area is also, first of all very beautiful. And so some women really have this really deep dimples here, which I find so beautiful, cute, sexy, amazing. So you can dip your fingers into this area. All the lower back is charged with energy, sometimes designation there so it's really good to massage, especially if a woman is before menstruation or menstruating, it can be really tender and good to massage as well. So there's a bone here. So you can also go under the bone. You can apply. So this more fire element, (woman moans) more movements and also more friction, more heat. So other here it seems like the next step will be to touch the ass. We will skip over the ass for the moment and we'll get back to your beautiful ass soon. And in a moment, I'll explain why, I'll explain the reason for that. So we're going to go towards the feet. Massage the feet and go up towards not just the ass, but also towards the yoni, not touching the yoni yet, but this will build a little bit of an anticipation. So this is part of the attitude that we have that going from up down and also from outside in. So we're going from the external body towards the ass and the genitals. Okay? So this is why I'm skipping the ass right now, going towards the feet and the legs, going up and then doing an ass massage. So let's see how this looks like. So the feet. So like with other parts of the body, you can start without oil. So for example, you can press into the feet. (man breathing heavily) So just breathe all the way down to your feet. (lady breathing softly) Yes. Pressing into the feet. And also rock depression a bit. So I'm pressing and again, the same attitude the same approach of building a rhythm, rocking the person (man breathing softly) So breath all the way down to your feet. (both breathing softly) Yes. So here again, using just a bit of muscle, but otherwise I'm just using my weight, leaning back just pulling, just squeezing, doing this, exploring muscles, bones, (indistinct chatter) Feels good? Somewhere else. Somewhere else, okay. (lady chuckles) I mean, I'm here in my body. Yeah, it's actually a good point, which is it's like a combination, when you're holding the session for your partner of them being in their body, but also not getting dissociated and absentminded and stuff. So there's personally, I believe that it's really good for a person to really feel be aware of everything that you're doing. Okay, this is the beauty of this practice that it calls you into embodiment. So this is why sometimes very often I talk with my with my clients, with my lover, I ask them if it's good, ask them for the yes, ask them to breathe to make sure that they keep coming back into their body. Stretching a bit side to side Stretching the toes a bit. Massaging the individual toes. When you do this, your lover partner, girlfriend will think that you're really professional. So this is something that a lot of massage practitioners do. It's really good. If you can get the sound I'm not sure if I... (joint click sound) Yeah. Sometimes I find it a little bit distracting and get like intense. So sometimes you would wanna skip this. Another thing that you can do is go between the toes. So one of the things in erotic massage and generally in this massage is to bring awareness and to bring touch to areas that haven't been touched before. So maybe she actually hasn't massage herself between her toes. So you bring this to her, you bring a new kind of touch to her and you open her body in new ways. You can do all of the toes like this. After you do one foot, you can do the other foot Yeah, you can also use your fists and your knuckles to dig into the feet and notice that some people would be really, really sensitive in the feet. I have some sensitive points as well. So if somebody does this to me, this would be really tender. So really notice what's going on with your partner. And then if... Yes. It feels good for you So for the purposes of this demonstration, I'm not gonna do the whole thing, but the whole thing again but just to remind the toes, massaging the toes. And if you want, you can spend like five minutes on one foot, 10 minutes on one foot. There's no limit to how long you can spend on any part of the body. Going between the toes. This is like another reminder the attitude or approach, which is we are hinting on penetration. So I'm penetrating with my fingers between her toes. Finalizing that. How does it feel to have this keyless tendon pressed like this? Yes? (indistinct) touch. I had a woman in the session that had an orgasm from this and then I integrated this to all of the sessions. Well, some of the sessions nowadays I don't actually do so much massage and bodywork. So going towards... Going to a new area, another area, applying enough oil. So not the fleshy muscly area. So I'm pushing specifically here in this middle part into the flesh, into the muscle, putting my body weight. Is the pressure okay babe? Hmm. When I'm getting to the knees I'm relaxing a bit. I'm not pushing too strongly into the knees. It's doing that a few times. So one of them is that pressing into another one is squeezing this area. You can press into the middle with your thumbs. (both breath softly) You can massage the size of the knees as well. If you want, you can also raise the leg and massage the whole part of the leg. Again, there's no limit to how fine tune, how deep you can go. How many details you want to include. So what I'm sharing with you is a more and less detailed, it's a more general approach. So you don't feel that you have to go through all of these details. You don't get stressed over, "Oh, did I cover this point and that point?" So it's more about the approach rather than the details. So in preparation, to going to this area and making sure that there's enough oil. How does this feel babe? ( breaths softly) Exciting. So I'm doing these strokes with my thumbs and then using my thumbs on her inner thighs going up running until here and then turning away. So it's like a J, and as you noticed, I was doing this Js or circles gradually closer and closer to her Yoni. Until I get really close. Go to her ass as well. We're gonna give her beautiful ass specific attention in a moment. You can also press not just with the fingers but generally with the root of your palms, into the muscle. (man breaths heavily) So what I've just done in the past minutes or so was one movement. So I started from here around the knees and I went really, really, really slowly, much slower than this until I got here to this beautiful line. So notice we're back to this beautiful line that we talked about in the central massage exercise or demonstration. So I got here and what I've done is kinda like focused the energy, condensed the energy, go really, really slow. So I was teasing. I was building anticipation. So maybe something in her mind goes like, "Oh he's going like closer to my Yoni, closer to my Yoni, closer to my Yoni, he's nearly touching my Yoni." And then just the last moment I'm not actually touching her Yoni, but I'm going to discrete between the thigh and the ass and then I'm hooking my finger. There's a muscle here and I'm hooking my finger under the muscle and I'm slightly expanding it. So I'm going up and up and up. And then there's the muscle here, just when the thigh is and I'm hooking my thumb under the muscle and I'm slightly separating it. So that's another aspect of the approach of opening her gradually. Let me just show you how that looks like from here finding the muscle here. Even if you don't find the muscle if you just do it on the skin here, that's also okay. Doing it on the muscle is easier. Then it's really beautiful you separates the lips I wanna get for a while. How does that feel for your darling? This specific stroke? Hmm, thumbs up. Okay, good. I'm just gonna pause so you can just make yourself comfortable. (lady moaning) So this is another beautiful thing you can do with the thighs. (indistinct) some of my many favorite places in a woman's body. Even really, really thin women have like thighs too, to work with and enjoy. So this is something, another thing that you can do. So scooping, I'm doing this, thighs. (breaths heavily) What's the sound of how this feels like babe? (lady moans) Yeah. Again I'm careful not to touch the Yoni, not that there's a problem to touch the Yoni but right now it's like I'm giving her the message all the time, I know where Yoni is and I'm being really careful not to touch it. At some massages you can actually start touching the Yoni from this position but right now we're not going to do that. You can also do this from the other side. I can do this. You can switch to the other side or you can just stay here and do this with thumbs. So occasionally I would reach all the way up to her neck, just to connect all of the body together. Same thing with going down to the feet. So you're constantly integrating all of the body together. So we went from the neck to the lower back, from the feet to the thighs. Now it's time to give due respect to your beautiful ass. So this areas, the thighs and the crotch, it's something that many massage practitioners don't work on and also the ass. So it's very beautiful for you to share this with your partner. So any way that you can work on, touch, squeeze, push into the buttocks, the ass you know, just do that. So circular movements. I am pushing my root of my palm into her buttocks going in kind of like circular directions. Doing this. (moaning) Yeah look for the sounds. This is your instruction manual. And encourage her to make sounds as well. There's also a point here which you can press into either with your fingers, (moaning) or with your root of your palms. (moaning) So you can just keep doing this for a while. You can also press with your fingers underneath so there's this hipbone here and you can reach under it. (heavy breathing) (moaning continuously) So now I'm pushing less strong, I'm just doing it faster. So I'm not pushing as deep. So this was deep. Now I'm pushing less deep and I'm just doing it faster. (moaning continuously) You can also work on one buttocks with two hands. (moaning) Digging into the flesh with fingers, thumbs, root of the palm. You can also use your knuckles. (moaning) Also you can work on this beautiful line here. So I'm doing this. I'm just hooking and hooking and hooking. Hooking and releasing. (moaning) Connecting the whole body. Sometimes reaching for the hands which creates connection also on a different level, connection with the heart. (moaning) So I'm moving the root of my palm very vigorously on her coccyx here. So it's kind of like feels hinting on the anus but not going there. Creates a lot of heat energy, arousal. (moaning) Yes that's the sound of it. (moaning) Yes that's the sound of it. (moaning) Yes. Okay. Yeah go into it. Go into it. Go into the sound yes. (moaning continuously) (sighs) (moaning) Yes when you have convulsions just breathe. And taking your time whenever you're ready you can turn around to lie on your back. How do you feel? (sighs) Connected, shaky, and (sighs) orgasmic. (both exhale heavily) As much as possible get your partner to have her mouth open (both exhales heavily) breathe flowing all the time, a bit of sound and that the breathe is going to the lower belly. (both exhale heavily) (lady exhales heavily) So again, bring in touch everywhere in the body. And one of the things you can do with the belly is just going around in circles, clockwise, anticlockwise Mm-Hmm. You can also do this kind of movement, so pushing, pulling with one hand or with two hands. You can be digging. (lady exhales heavily) So you are also releasing a bit of stuff in the colon, intestine, stomach, so if the woman farts, just tell her, no problem. It's all natural... And you can tell the woman, like, if you need to fart, just let it out, we're friends here, so it's part of the attitude of everything is okay, everything is welcomed. Same thing some pee might be released. I had a woman literally shit a little bit during really strong stimulation once. So always just take it easy, you know, just give it the feeling that it's okay and everything's welcomed. So going towards the breasts, we had a lot of focus on the breasts earlier, (lady exhales heavily) so specifically when you're doing a yoni massage session or whole body erotic massage, bring awareness to the... Bring touch to the breast as well, include this whole area, shoulders, so you can reach under the shoulder and massage as well. And now the hands, I want to just remove your rings. Mm-Hmm. (both breathing heavily) (lady breathing heavily) So pressing into the hand. Once you can do this funky Thai massage techniques. Okay, so putting your pinky finger here and here and then so that I use to stretch. (both moan) Don't have to, you can just hold it and do this, again, always go for simple intuitive flowing. Again to repeat something I said earlier, some things might not feel orgasmic in the moment but after you finish such a massage all of the body will be activated. So anything you do will be a whole body experience rather than just a genital experience. Massaging the fingers, so it's same things that I showed with the toe but with the fingers there's a bit more, so keep your finger relaxed just let me do everything, okay? Do you like that, just to let me do everything? Yes. So notice that your recipient might try to help you, so just notice, so at least could just held out a finger for me and that's why I asked her to relax. Mosh, be mosh. That you can call it, this is an attitude, inviting your recipient to be mosh. Totally soft. That's trying to help you. (lady moans softly) (lady breaths heavily) The hands by the way, are very, very sensitive in terms of nerve endings. Not as much as the genitals, but still a lot. Basically our hands, faces specifically our lips and our genitals have the most nerve endings in them, so there are most sensitive to touch. (lady exhales heavily) Pressing into, following the muscles, following the bones. (lady moans) Try a very similar movement throughout the body. (lady moans) Interesting? Aha. So, was the feeling coming from your elbow? It's very orgasmic. Okay, that's a first for me, that's the first time I really touched some of these elbow and she felt so- That's the inside. Yeah, so again, there's no point in showing you kind of like what this point is because there's a million points like this, okay? So just spontaneously, I was just called 'cause I was following her body, following her responses, following my intuition. So I was like, Oh, well, I definitely have never pressed this before. I was like, Oh, okay, I'm pressing this. And suddenly she's moaning, okay? So that's a reminder, it's like we keep finding new places and spots all the time. Compress gently into the armpits as well. I can show from there. So I'm not gonna do everything on the other side but when you're doing it it's good if you do that. Okay, so I'm just gonna do this for a second just to... (lady moans) I'm just going to show you what... you can also massage the armpit. Under the armpit, so there's this muscle here, so massaging underneath. And again, this is a detail, okay? So there's many, many, many details and many points in the body that you can explore and work way not so important, okay? Just work on the main things that we talked about. So going closer and closer to her yoni. Okay, so notice how many things you can do before you touch a woman's yoni. So this aspect of going from outside in that literally can take hours. It doesn't have to take hours every time you can do a version of this in 10 minutes. Just go over the whole body, over the main areas. But it's good sometimes to take two or three hours for this. My sessions used to be three, four, sometimes five hours when I started. Nowadays, I do much less massage and bodywork, so it takes me less time but yeah, specifically, if you're starting, if you're sharing it with your partner, it's really beautiful to share this long massage all over the body. The thighs, the thighs, the thighs, the thighs. Okay, so you can work on the thighs and the legs from this side of the body as well. Oh, here we can do this. So let's look at her thigh. How does this feel babe? Sexy. This is a big no-no for some massage practitioners but again, don't fall into dogmas and stuff. It's yeah, like she just said better than me, sexy. So some people wouldn't like it and some people would go absolutely crazy with this way of- If you are my partner then I like it. (chuckles) Cool, thank you. And that's also an attitude for the receiver, so the receiver is open for whatever the giver is giving to her, doing to her, sharing with her as long it is not painful or bad, or totally boring. It's really openness to whatever your partner is doing. So, I'm scooping, I'm pulling, so it's like this, scooping the flesh, I nearly wanted to say the meat, you know, it's like so juicy. This is a very beautiful erogenous area to work with and again, I constantly like near her yoni, near her yoni, near her yoni. Just going on this line of the thigh up to the joint here, without touching her yoni. No problem in touching the yoni we'll get there soon, okay? But I'm just building anticipation, trust, connection the message that we have time and I'm enjoying your whole body. I'm pressing from this side, I'm pressing into here as well. So it would look like... So I'm pressing into... So there's this line and I'm just going all around this line. (lady moans) What's this here? (indistinct) (lady moans heavily) So there's a few lines that you can work on here. Let's say if there's this muscle, you can work under it. You can work above it. Okay, so this line under it, under this line, you can work above this line and you can work directly on it, on this muscle. (lady moans) Same thing here. It's easier to sync really into the body here. And you can also... Same here on the other side what I was just done over there, reaching under. Again, you notice that a lot of the things that I'm doing are more freestyle, so I needed to find word to explain to my students and now to you about these lines, but I don't even think about it so much. It's more like, Oh, let's see in how many ways I can touch your thigh. So it's the attitude of exploration. Let's see in how many ways I can touch her thighs. (lady moans) Afterwards we do the other side. Obviously, usually when you do this at home aim to equalize the sides. Now after we've completed that we are ready to finally go towards her yoni. So this is a really beautiful example of preparing building it up, activating the whole body and then going towards the yoni, first of all the externally yoni and then going inside. So let's see how this looks like, although you can do in the whole body massage without the genitals, okay? So this can be everything that is happening and we can stop here, go back to the breasts, it doesn't have to even include genitals. So a whole body massage is totally okay if it's whole body without your genitals. But obviously today, we would like to share with you how it looks like also to massage the outside and then the inside of her yoni. So yeah, let's see how this looks like. In this video, I'll show how one movement of massage or of touch, builds a lot of orgasmic energy, a lot of pleasure, and it's connected to what I call hinting or sometimes it's called also teasing. Notice that I go very close to her vagina, but I definitely do not touch her vagina, and this is the whole idea, the whole secret of this technique is to go around, go close, but not actually to touch. (woman moans) Yes. (woman moans) Yes. (woman moans) So that was one, gesture, one move. And it started here, and then I went really, really, really, really, really slowly probably like a minute or two until I got here. And then I stayed here for another minute or two. And again, I did this thing when I'm separating when I'm, finding where the... it's like a string, it's like a guitar string and I'm finding it and then I'm pulling it. Finding it and I'm pulling it. And you noticed it was like this yearning like, yes, yes, yes, yes, and touch and touch, no I'm not. (woman laughs) (woman moans) Okay. So after this beautiful process, this beautiful preparation, we're getting closer and closer to the yoni and I think it's time to get there to show you how to really touch a woman's yoni externally and then gradually internally as well. So, darling, would you like me to touch your yoni? Yes. Would you invite me in with a full sentence to touch your yoni? I invite you to touch my yoni. Hmm thank you. So I'm first touching your yoni with my eyes (clears throat) and I'm loving what I'm seeing. So some women would have issues with how the yoni looks like. Porn shows us one version and many women for example would have long protruding inner lips. So porn usually doesn't show that. So they would feel inadequate. They feel there's something wrong about them. (clears throat) One lip is bigger than the other different kinds of colors and shapes, different kinds of hair. And there's even phenomena that women are going to plastic surgery to change how the yoni looks like, specifically they are hiding the inner lips. So this, I find very very sad that there's literally genital mutilation for women to adhere to some beauty norm. So it's very important that every woman that you would, especially for your partner knowing if you are also being with different partners you just tell them how beautiful the yoni is. You first finding the beauty in the yoni you really appreciate and worship their yoni and then make sure that you express it in words how much you love their body, how much you love the yoni how much it turns you on, and also what you would like and love about it. So this is something that maybe some women have never heard 'cause they just heard the negative self-talk they constantly told themselves how much they are not attractive and they have this problem and that problem. So you as a man, seeing that appreciating that worshiping that, expressing that with words and also expressing that through your touch. So your touch is also a way to worship the way that you touch is also a way to worship. Does that make sense for you as a woman? Absolutely yeah. Does that resonate with your own experience or? Yeah, when I was younger, I felt like, "Oh I have too long inner lip or something." Yeah and then I fell in love and it doesn't matter anymore. (chuckles) Oh, it matters it's so cute. Your inner lip is like she's doing this. (laughs) Now and it's really, really cute. It was actually a practice of yoni gazing. So you can literally look intensely sit between a woman's legs and look at her yoni for a while for a few minutes and you can also do this verbally, so you can tell her I see this, I like this, I love this. This turns me on and so on. So really express what it is that you like. And obviously a woman can do this for a man. And obviously for those same sex couples, men and men, woman and woman you can do this to each other. So it's really beautiful to express your appreciation, express your worship of each other's bodies. Okay, it's good to make the woman comfortable. Some women are not as flexible as Alishka is this is a good position to start with. And afterwards I will change position but this is a really good position to start with. So you invited me already a moment ago. And just, if you would like to invite me again to touch your yoni. Can you touch my yoni? I can, would you like to invite me to touch? Yes, I invite you to touch my yoni. Yeah so feel the difference because many women have been subjected and some women maybe somebody asked him for consent, but I'm asking you to invite me which is a more empowered way to connect. So I invite you to touch my yoni and I receive your touch. Thank you, so this is a very important moment after all of this preparation, finally touching the yoni. So I'll make sure, first of all, I did the eye gazing and then I make sure that my body relaxed and breathing into my belly and my body is relaxed am positioning myself. So I'm there, I'm resting on my hands. So this hand is totally relaxed and then very, very very softly. I'm going to cup a yoni and just hold and just pause and just wait and just feel. So this is how it looks like you can also do eye gazing in the same time. Yeah, just making sure that I'm positioning my hands and then we're looking at each other's eyes and breathe. Make sure you breathe, make sure you are sipping breathe. (both breathe deeply) Yeah if you wanna close your eyes you can do that. (breathing heavily) So I'm just holding, just holding, not doing anything not squeezing, not putting my fingers inside, just holding. And it's kind of like firm, but relaxed way of holding. How does that make you feel, the way that I'm holding? Like what is the feeling that comes up? Safe, I trust. So I'm cupping. So I'm cupping her yoni and kind of like my fingers are nearly all the way to the entrance of the yoni. I can even release and then touch again a bit higher or a bit lower? The main thing is that your fingers are not too close to the entrance and trying to kind of like get into the entrance. Okay, so if you have enough touch arousal around then the woman would want you to touch inside. So I'm kind of like squeezing gently. (moaning) Very gently. All of this is still without oil. (moaning) Very gently. Then I'm doing Pussy Shiatsu as it's called sometimes. So I'm using my two fingers to push on both sides of the lips on the external lips the outer lips up and down. Pussy Shiatsu. Pussy Shiatsu yeah. I wonder what the Japanese would say about this. (laughs) I can do this with a fingers. You can do this with the thumbs. And I'm avoiding direct clitoris stimulation right now later we might enjoy it a little bit but there's so much yoni apart from the clit. Well, the thing that you can do is you can squeeze the two lips together which is another thing that women have never received. (breathes deeply) Yeah what's the sound that comes up. Yes what's the sound. (moaning) Yeah let the sound out. Yes so I'm just squeezing and holding. Yes, let you sound out. (moaning) And I'm squeezing just strong enough to actually hold the lips but not too strong to hurt. (moaning) Squeezing all of the lips the outer lips, the inner lips, everything. (moaning) Can also stretch side to side a little bit. If something doesn't feel right comfortable just let me know, darling. Up and down, circles. (moaning) This is good to do before you put oil. Because if you put oil, it will be really slippery, so. (moaning) So after Pussy Shiatsu we can stretch the individual lips. Can do this either with oil or without oil. Without oil, you can have a better hold, better grasp of the lip of the skin with oil it will be more slippery but then also you can slide. So you can do both of them. Can also squeeze again. And now you're ready for me to put oil on your bed? Yes. So I let a drip. Yes. I wanna hear how this feels. (breathes deeply) So using all of the surface of my hand to connect to all of the surface of her Yoni (breathes gently and slowly) On the way from my... This part of my hand touching the entrance to her yoni. So it's a very wide touch. It's not a finger touch, okay? All of the surface of yoni all the way up, very firm touch. So be careful because some guys do it too rough and then they press the lip with, to the bone, which is a bit painful. Okay, some women are more sensitive. Some women are less sensitive but everyone decides of being softer. And then just ask the woman if she would like a more firm touch. Then you can massage. Doing the same thing that we did without oil with the oil. So now I can't hold so much 'cause it's sliding. But the fact that the lips are sliding is also pleasurable. Same thing with the... And again, make sure you've heard before that your fingernails are short and if possible you can also, what's the word, not just trim your fingernails, but file. Yeah file your fingernails. So pulling, stretching, kneading I love how your.. To see how your inner lips are connected to your outer lips. So massaging the outer lips first, massaging, kneading, sliding my thumb over them as well. Sometimes going a little bit outer to the thighs, to the groin. Then you can even go in fine details like the line between the inner lip and the outer lip. So here, this line, very sensitive line. Just repeatedly up and down, just building this repetition, move, rhythm, stability. On the way up to where the lips meet same on the other side. Searching the clitoral hood. So her clit is right here for some women it will protrude out, for some women they wouldn't like the clit hood to be massaged because it will feel too intense. So just tell me if we are intense a bit. (mumbles) Keep going. No it's just what feels-- Oh it feels good. Yeah okay. (mumbles) So as long as you don't explode, as long as you don't explode your orgasm. (moaning) So it's not so much clitoral stimulation, it's more about massaging the hood of the clit, the cover on the clit. You can press here. So this is not direct clitoral stimulation but it feels really, really close because the clit actually extends in inwards. And if you apply any clitoral stimulation you don't have to rub you just can just hold. (moaning) To your belly, so breathe into your belly. So I'm just holding and pressing lightly. And I'm feeling her clit moving against my finger. Making sure I'm not doing it too much. And then spreading the energy, moving the energy. And then the inner lips pulling a bit most of the time just doing this between two fingers. Just going to do it a bit harder, just tell me if it's too hard. That's okay. Yes. So keep asking your partner for feedback reminding her that you can ask if something doesn't feel right for you to do it softer or to stop doing it or do something else and move it over to the other lip , the inner lip. And again, this is a touch that... Is that a bit tender? Yes. Thank you. This is a kind of touch that women have never received. Many women have never received this not even from themselves. You can massage the inside of the lips Along the crack going up to the clit. So the thing with the clit it's just saying hello sometimes, not occasionally coming for a visit. If you just rub it and rub it and rub it's becomes hypersensitive. And you can have this kind of orgasm that doesn't really serve the woman and her pleasure drops. She becomes hyper sensitive, so really careful around the clit. The clit is not bad, we love it, we appreciate it. It's there for a reason we just learning how to play and love the clit and not attack it. (moaning) Yeah go on. (moaning) Just tell me if you are too close to clitoral orgasm, okay? There is so much pleasure. Okay so how does it sound the pleasure. Keep expressing it. (moaning) So what I've done in the past, I don't know what it's two or three or four minutes was one stroke. So two, three, or whatever. I lost sense of time, four minutes whatever it was was one stroke. So let me show you again where it goes from in a way where it goes to. So I start by placing again this area of my palm on the entrance to her yoni, okay? her perineum, perineum is between her entrance for yoni and her anus. So I'm very, very down, very down low. Okay and I'm pressing so it feels really good to be pressing into the perineum and then into the entrance with something which is very wide, okay? So it doesn't feel pointy, later by the way it also feels good when it's pointy but you start from wide and then you go kind of like more pointy. So I went from here gradually, slowly all the way up to here. It just took me minutes. So what it just took me now 10 seconds earlier took me a few minutes because I was moving so slowly. I was building pleasure, building arousal, building awareness. So because I'm pushing into the body, into the flesh, it's like she gets the opportunity to feel everything which is happening 'cause I'm not changing things too fast. And when I do a couple of sessions and teach men how to touch in arouse women So it always happens that the men always, always, always always does this too fast. I've never had anybody who first time or even second time they did as slow as I was showing him. Okay, men always touch too early, too fast, too strong. So really slow. So this is called, this technique is called the slow rub. I haven't learned it anywhere. I learned it by making love a lot and doing a lot of sessions. So I learned it by myself and this is a really amazing favorite with my lovers and with my clients and with my workshop participants. So slow rub really you can do this a few times even because before we did one lip the other lip inner lip other inner lip, clitoral hood, this areas, and this is basically touching massaging, everything, everything, everything. Okay and again this beautiful wide area touch. So this is the slow rub. Theoretically, you can also do it downward. I usually do it upwards, but I can also do it downwards And then we start massaging around the entrance. So this is the entrance to her beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, amazing yoni. So most men, again not you other men, (chuckles) me in the past for sure. Okay well just wet their fingers and well hopefully wet their fingers sometimes not even and just stick their fingers in. So it's, instead of doing that it's much more beautiful, much more arousing much more connected to massage the entrance, okay? By the way later you can do that with your cock as well. Just rub your cock around the entrance until she gets crazy. And once crazily horny and wants you to penetrate her. So I'm pressing with my fingers around the entrance. I'm pressing also on the perineum this muscle which is between the entrance and the anus make sure that don't go down to the anus because then you can bring bacteria into the yoni. So whatever you see in porn is not really healthy and not, yeah totally not healthy for the woman when a man goes between her anus and her vagina. So I just go until her perineum. So massaging the entrance and you can do the same thing with that have done a moment ago, just focusing on this area. Sometimes need to change position. I get a bit numb, so is this just okay? Yes. Yeah and if you need to rest it's okay, I can stretch out. So I'm pressing the perineum, I'm pressing the entrance and when I'm massaging the entrance many women would feel as if I'm already inside. Okay, so really... It's already feeling a little bit inside. (moaning) So baby would you like to have finally, actually my actual real fingers inside you? I invite you to give me a Yoni massage. Thank you. Just, she's she's wet already and she's already lubricate from the oil, so she gave me permission to fill it. You know, we had all of this beautiful preparation, so now it's the right moment. So darling really feel and be totally aware of my finger as it goes in. I want to see a breathe and here you sound. (soft moaning) Yes? Yes. (deep breaths) (soft moaning) (deep breaths) So I inserted my finger very, very slowly. And then I just hook it a little bit up, so it is right now, nearly nearly three knuckles in, a little bit deeper, so I'd say three knuckles in and I just hook it a little bit up and I just pause. I just stay there, I don't start milking and squeezing, just rest. (soft moaning) So again, notice I keep using the same attitudes. Okay, going slow, going slower than what think slow is, reaching a certain point and then resting there. (soft moaning) Feel your pulse inside your yoni. (loud moaning) So angling, hooking my finger upwards is touching her G-spot. G-spot feels something between very, very hard lips. Let's say really when you tense your lips and they're really muscly and strong, it would feel like that, or really hard tongue as well. Maybe not a really hard tongue, you know, just a tongue, and it feels different than the other walls of the vagina so it really sticks out the G-spot. So it's two to three finger breaths inside as you hook in towards up. Okay, you can do this with one finger, two fingers. I'm starting with one finger and soon I might put the other one in. So I'm going to change position in order to reach to different parts. Ah, yes thank you. (soft moaning) Yes baby. (loud moaning) So I'm just holding, just holding. I'm not doing anything, I'm just holding. (louder moaning) Yes baby. Yes baby. Yes baby. So what we'll be doing now is a healing technique, which is called the clock technique. You can also find it in the book, Orgasm Unleashed that I mentioned earlier, and this is really beautiful healing experience, and also an exploration experience. So you can find healing, you can find pleasure. So the healing aspect is that you might go to areas that might feel really tender and painful, and then you just stay there and you just keep pressing there. And you might also find this knots in the Yoni similar to what you find in let's say the back around, different places around the body so the muscles are knotted together and then you just do this you can massage this area a little bit to dissolve the knot, so you either press let's say if the knot is here, you either press the knot itself, or you press all around the not okay. Either the note itself or all around the knot Some places would, there would not be a knot, but she would have pain or very strong emotions coming up, so invite her to express that, to keep breathing into the belly to keep making a sound and generally to stay relaxed. So you see her body's totally relaxed. So it called it's called the clock technique, because I'm starting from here, which is 12 o'clock so if this is 12 and under is six on the left is nine, on the right is three. Okay, so the clock is here. So I'll be going around the clock. I'll be going very slowly, I'm just showing with the direction I'll be taking, but I'll be going around the clock, actually do this with, are you okay with having my other finger inside you? Would you like to have my other finger inside? Yes. Okay. Let me do this with this finger alone. So I'm inserting my finger kind of like all the way in, hooking it a little bit up and this is the G-spot. This is 12 o'clock. Okay? Then I'm going to 11 o'clock. (loud moaning) So here is 11 o'clock. So I'm pressing into this. (deep breaths) Yes, just go for it. Whatever you need to express baby. Whatever you need to express. (loud moaning) Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. So it's okay to express emotions and then just relax. That was 11 o'clock. If something is happening, if this is an emotional expression, can stay there for a bit longer and then you can move to the next point. So I am at 10 o'clock. Finger is in, and if I'm doing, was doing it on the other side, it's like, I'm doing this and just holding. (soft moaning) And if you want, you can do it on little bit more shallow, and a little bit more deep. I like generally to go on the deep ring of muscles, 10 o'clock. (soft moaning) Then nine o'clock. (loud moaning) So on and on, eight, seven, six and then, and obviously after a while, it's like it's going to be really hard to reach. Okay, so keep yourself relaxed okay? If you see my body now my body is all contracted and convoluted. So instead you can just replace the finger, and make sure that the finger is the fingers lubricated and then even from six o'clock you can six o'clock back to 12 to zero you can use the other finger, okay? Just so you don't, you stay relaxed, 'cause your body needs to be relaxed, in order for her body to be relaxed, okay. You can also ask her to describe, so let's say when I'm pressing six o'clock just write down what comes up if there's an emotion, color, sensation, anything, any word, you know? So my girlfriend once said broccoli in one of the points. Okay, so that was the association that she had. It might be strong emotions. It might be joy. It might be numbness. If it's numbness, it means that she's not feeling much and she might be blocking what she's feeling, suppressing what she's feeling, avoiding what she's feeling. Okay, so just stay there and invite her to keep expressing. Just pressing a bit deeper. (loud moaning) So there's a few interesting spots that you can explore as well. So there's the G-spot and the very common thing with the G-spot that people know is doing this to the G-spot either with one or two fingers. Okay. Does it feel different than just holding a dollar? Uh-huh Okay. So now I'm doing this. Always start gently. Don't rub or squeeze too hard, always gently. Can use with two fingers, especially with the Yoni, always err on the side of having more oil rather than less oil and also make sure that the lips are lubricated, all of your fingers are lubricated. And obviously if possible, the woman should be lubricated naturally already. So slightly close to the entrance, so about two knuckles in is the G-spot. Okay. So this is this. If I'm inserting my fingers and angling them up towards here, so it's not so much here, it's more here. (woman moaning) Yes, there. Can even intensify it a little bit by pressing here. Don't have to. So this is another point which is called the A point. Just pressing into the wall of the vagina. It's not exactly a point, it's an area. So it's between the G-spot and the cervix. We'll get to the cervix in a moment. Okay. So I'm pressing all the way here. And I can also be doing the same come here movement. I can be moving my fingers around a bit. Yes? Yes Yes? Yes. Yes? Yes. And you can also be sliding from the A-spot to the G-spot. So really exploring all of this area. If you wanna get even deeper, you can get the woman's legs higher. Then if you insert your fingers all the way in, you would find something poking at you from the back of the Yoni. Okay, so this is the cervix. The cervix is the entrance to the womb, also called the neck of the womb in some languages. Okay. And the cervix is the most sacred, the most sensitive, the most meaningful, the most charged area in a woman's physical body. Okay. You can say the heart is very charged in some ways but the cervix is, in a physical way, it's very, very sensitive. It has a lot of energy. For many women it's numb or it's painful or both. So I'm really needing to press all the way in in order to reach. So it feels totally different. It's like you can't mistake the cervix for anything else. So the walls of the vagina, a very, very soft and juicy and it doesn't feel like the cervix. The cervix literally is like a little nose or finger that I'm meeting. So it's like, if this is my finger inside I'm yeah, it's like I'm meeting this here. So with the cervix first, you can just hold (woman moaning) or press or do this movements. (woman moaning) You can go around in circles. So don't press into this. So don't try to insert your finger into the cervix. It would be nearly impossible with women who didn't give birth, but with women who gave birth, their cervix will be nice and open. So you can press on it, just make sure you don't insert your finger really into the cervix. So going around. And you can explore different angles to which the cervix. So you'll notice it's like, I'm not just putting my fingers in, I'm putting some of my hand into her Yoni. The Yoni is very flexible, so that allows me to reach the cervix. Going around the cervix. So another area that you can reach is just underneath the cervix, sometimes very difficult to reach. So it's very, very deep. Okay. So if the cervix is here, I'm reaching underneath it. (woman moaning) Generally all of the lower wall of the Yoni. Okay. So if this is the upper wall, this is the lower wall. I'm reaching down and I'm doing this all the way in. (woman moaning) I'm doing this. So this area in the specifically bottom wall of the vagina is also very sensitive and it feels a little bit anal because the anus, it shares the same internal wall with the rectum. Okay, so it feels a bit anal. I call it clean anal. So it's the anal feeling without dealing with shit. Not that it's bad, but it's just much easier. Does it feel anal for you? Do you feel the... Uh-huh. Okay. And also if you do this more around the entrance? Uh-huh. Okay. So that's another point. Don't worry about getting all the points, just explore. And another way to explore is what they call twist and shout. (woman laughing) Okay, so you insert, twist, exit, twist, insert, twist, and it's kinda like (woman moans) Half twist, quarter twist, half twist and so, a full twist. (woman moaning) So it's not so much this. It's not finger fucking. It's more about the turning movement. So with the turning movements, with my fingers, I'm reaching all around her vagina. (man sighs) So it's called twist and shout because you twist and she shouts. (woman laughs) (woman moans) (woman moans) (woman moans) You can do that for a while. Can go back to G-spot stimulation. So it's good to be a few minutes on one area, but don't be for half an hour on one area, okay? So move between different areas in the Yoni. (man sighs) (woman moans) (man breathes heavily) You can breath it in, breath it deeper, yes. (man sighs) (woman moans) So if it's sensation is stronger you can breathe stronger, you can breath through your mouth. (man groans) Yes, it's much easier to breathe through your mouth, yes. Yes babe. (woman moaning) Yes babe. (woman moans) So I'm doing this on her G-spot a little bit on her eye-spot, (woman moans) keep breathing. (man sighs) (man sighs) (woman moans) A bit of numbness in your, in your hands? Ahaa. Yeah. So that, okay I'm feeling something. Yeah. So that might happen to women, it happens to many women that they have numbness, electricity, goosebumps, pins and needles, losing sensation, starting with their hands. Just let it be, just let it be. There's nothing, nothing you need to do about that. It can travel up to the whole arms. It can travel to the upper lips and generally to the face. I had some women that, like their hand, hand and arm look up something called T-Rex. Okay, so everything locks up and also there might be other funkier things, really feeling of disorientation, feeling like they're fainting. So there basically, a lot of energy movement and some of the energy getting stuck. So just keep breathing, keep relaxing, keep expressing I'm just trusted to everything. Okay. I never lost, nobody died in my session, you know. So, (woman breathing heavily) Yeah, very natural. Okay. If there's pleasure, keep going. And if it walks, don't fix it. Okay. If you're doing something and it's pleasurable just keep doing that, find the pleasurable area and build pleasure. (woman moans) And also find the painful area and apply healing to them. (man sighs) (woman moans) (woman sighs) (man sighs) (woman moans) Darling, I'm gonna remove my hands in a moment. Mmh. Before I do that, just to unconnect. (man sighs) So I was kind of like in this area, it's good to move around a little bit also to be able to release the throat. (woman moans) Also moving up, so, both my fingers inside and massaging the throat a little bit. Massaging the heart, massaging the breasts holding the hands, so connecting with the hands as well. It can be reaching under and massaging the buttocks, pressing into the lower belly, mainly all the time, come back to here, connecting the yoni with the heart. Also take her hand, so her hand is connected to you. Yeah. (rattling sound) I'm not moving my in fingers inside, I'm just holding. (woman moans) (woman moans) (woman moans) Yes babe, yes darling. (man sighs)