The Healing Power of Sex – A Field Guide

the healing power of sex
Written by Jenny Hale

:The healing power of sex is a highly controversial topic. There are numerous stories of various gurus and spiritual teachers in many different traditions (usually men) who have claimed to have special powers to heal their students (at least the female students) by the power of their magical “wand of light”.

“Ah yes,” he muses wisely, “I can see that your heart chakra is blocked. Let me help you with that …”

When I was in Rishikesh recently, a local tour guide offered to take me to a Tantric guru who lived in a cave near the town. Apparently, he took another foreign woman there, and she had sex with this guru (who was reportedly 70 or 80 years old), and it reportedly changed her life. I wasn’t excited by the prospect.

But then again, this same tour guide told me that he was a Brahmin, and that if I had sex with him it would accelerate my evolution, simply because he was a Brahmin (the Brahmin believe that they are gods in human form). He also told me that my second chakra was blocked, and that the cure was anal sex, which he was generously prepared to offer, free of charge.

As a practitioner of Tantric hatha yoga, I was well aware of the state of my second chakra, and knew full well that he was spouting bullshit. Not to mention that the anus is governed by the first chakra, not the second …

However, there have most likely been impressionable women with less experience with energy work who have passed through this chap’s sphere of influence, and they may well have fallen for his pitch.

So how can you tell the genuine from the charlatans in sexual healing? Or are they all charlatans?

What is the healing power of sex aka sexual healing?

Broadly, sexual healing can be divided into two main categories – healing issues related to sexuality via physical, energetic, emotional or mental processes, or using sexual energy to heal something.

Healing issues related to sexuality

Many people have physical or emotional obstacles to their sexual expression. Some men have problems getting an erection, or sustaining one, or lasting long enough before ejaculating. Others find it difficult to integrate their emotional life with their sex life. Some women find it difficult, or even impossible, to reach orgasm, or even experience pain during intercourse.

The causes of sexual problems can be on many levels.

Physically, too much tension in the pelvic floor can cause problems, as can weakness of the pelvic floor. Yoga, massage, stretching, and pelvic floor exercises can make a big difference when the causes are physical.

Energetically, if the flow of energy in the second chakra is restricted (which may indicate lack of blood flow, or lack of mapping of the nerves in the region to the conscious awareness), there may be weak desire, weak arousal, and other inhibitions of sexual expression. Energy massage, Tantric hatha yoga, reiki, and other forms of energy-aware bodywork can help relieve these problems.

Emotionally, especially for younger women, but also for men over 35, emotional conflict in a relationship can sabotage sexual desire. Childhood emotional trauma can also manifest as various unpleasant symptoms in adult sexuality. Emotional release work, rebirthing, ecstatic dance, and other forms of emotional exploration are important tools for addressing these issues.


Mentally, someone who lives too much “in their head” can miss the important biofeedback cues from their body as to when they feel sexual desire, for whom, and which sensations they find stimulating or pleasurable. Becoming embodied may require working with various forms of physical, energetic and emotional therapy, because there is usually a reason why someone takes refuge in concepts, rather than staying connected with their heart, their gut, and their intuition.

Using sexual energy to heal

Sexual energy is one of the most potent powers available to human beings. Because sexual energy brings into existence new human beings, it has the power to act at all levels – physical, energetic, emotional, mental, and even at the causal level (the level at which we carry karma or make sacred contracts between lifetimes).

Directing sexual energy into an intention is one of the simplest, yet most potent forms of magic. (There is a reason why witches were always portrayed as overtly sexual, and why organised religions have generally tried to make people fear and resist their own sexuality.)

The intention to heal oneself is one of the least dangerous uses of sex magic. We could talk at length about the risks and benefits of sex magic, but not today.

Here’s how

  1. Create a clean, pure, sacred space for your ritual.
  2. Begin by asking the Divine to hold and protect you throughout your magical ritual, ensuring that everything you do is harmonious and for the greatest good of all sentient beings.
  3. Hold your intention clearly in your mind.
  4. Begin raising sexual energy (either alone, or with a partner). If you are working with a partner, make sure they are supporting your intention by focusing on it with you.
  5. Feel the sexual energy moving from your pelvis to the area you want to heal. Maintain a clear mental image of the healing, and feel the emotions associated with being fully healed.
  6. Keep your focus on the intention. Remember, anything else you allow into your mind at this time will also be empowered by the sexual energy. So be extremely vigilant!
  7. When you are finished making love, take a moment of gratitude for the Divine.
  8. Ask the Divine “what is the first step I need to take for this intention to manifest?”
  9. Write down the answer you receive, and take the first step as soon as possible.
  10. Remember, for the greatest good of all sentient beings, you may need to do some work to be healed, or your healing may come in an unexpected form. Give up any attachment to how the fulfilment of your intention will look. Be open for whatever gifts the Divine send your way.


About the author

Jenny Hale

Jnani (Jenny) Hale has an Honours Degree in Psychology, and had a successful career in academia, consulting, and executive coaching before leaving the corporate world to pursue her passion - empowering people in non-traditional relationships.
She has over 15 years of experience building community in polyamorous, D/s, and sacred sexuality communities, and providing support to people to negotiate the relationship structures that serve their highest selves. She runs discussion groups, workshops, and one-on-one sessions, focusing on relationships as a pathway for personal and spiritual growth.

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